difficult decision - Nanny + pre-school or Nursery?

[cookiemonstress]

Hi
Am hoping someone might have experience of childcare dilemma. Have 2 dc, work 4 days, currently have nanny 3 days (family look after on other day).

Nanny option is expensive and currently working for very little financial gain which is a little soul destroying given the effort of actually doing my job. DD1 also desperately in need of more stimulation and I suspect a bit more routine. Was Having problem finding pre-school place but have found place from next april. However have also found out could get both into in nursery (3 full days) which would make childcare much cheaper (by almost £400 per month). Am in quandry though... nursery obviously less convenient (plus would feel awful letting nanny go) but would mean cuold work from home one day per week in proper peace and therefore catch up on lot more work wise (and laundry wise) so better in that respect. Also significant financial savings so actually worth being at work financially (being back at work more of insurance policy currently so don't slip down too far plus any money is extra money) plus addresses issue of immediate need for stimulation for dd1.

But in terms of dd1, would she benefit more from going to pre-school 5 days (consistent routine etc) and I continue with expensive nanny option (perhaps exploring nanny share when dd1 starts going to pre-school?)..

Have option paralysis and I need to resolve this issue fast!

Any thoughts welcomeed!

How old are your children?

I've run most of the childcare range. Ds stayed in a day nursery until he went to school - I was plagued with doubts that he would be at a disadvantage compared to the children who went to the pre-school but at the time I didn't want to move him.
When dd became pre-school age we changed to a nanny plus pre-school for her (and so nanny could do the school run and holidays)..however dd didn't cover anything at pre-school which she didn't do at the day nursery.
The big benefit of the nanny was that we didn't have to worry about the school run and school holidays for the older child - In our experience the day nursery was better for pre-school age children than pre-school plus nanny.

If you require full day care, then pre-school isn't an option is it... pre-schools tend to only operate for a few hours.

How old are the children?
What start time and finish time do you require for childcare (as timings can affect your choice).
Any particular reason why Childminders are not being considered?
Do you need childcare during pre-school holidays?
Where geographically are you located (could help determine typical costs).

Why isn't DD1 getting stimulation and routine from the nanny?

Hi

My DD is 3 1/2 and I have just accepted a pre school place for her at local school as I felt it was the best option for her to help her settle at school next sept. As we decided on pre school our only option was to look at child minder/nanny to manage the drops offs/collections and to look after DS. My situation is different as at present they are not in any child care so don't need to preserve status quo. However, I decided against nursery for a number of reasons including lack of flexibility but mainly as I didn't want DD to have too many changes before school. My decision though is perhaps easier as I have two DC's so cost of nanny roughly similar to nursery.

This has been our big delimma. I pulled DD out of full time nursery care which DD returned to after previous nanny left. Part of our decision was to do with the nursery itself though, which we didn't feel was appropriate for full time care. Also we were constantly getting charged late fees at night (£1 per minute) when the tube was down etc. it just wasn't working. Our one in town was much better and we would have stuck that.

I think they're required by law to have appropriate learning ie preschool level activities going on at the nursery, so at a good one your children shouldn't miss out.

The nanny option - when you have a nice one - is much easier in many respects. I know it's financially a killer though. We currently do 3.5 days with our nanny, one nursery day, on Friday's I'm home and take her to preschool in the am, nanny comes for a couple of hours in the aft. It works for us.

It sounds like your head and heart is telling you to do the nursery option - and so long as you're comfortable with where they're going I think it should be fine.

What about an au pair / nursery combination to get the cost down a bit but still have flexibility with some in home care, and still get the noisy kids out of the house so you can do some work from home?

Hi
Thanks for all your replies, all very helpful.... DD1 is almost three and dd2 is 12 months. DD1 (in my opinion and hers) desperately needs the stimulation of being with other children for a good portion of the day. (she often looks wistfully through the fence of our local nursery and tells me when she wants to go there). DD1 isn't very good at playing on her own and likes to be in the centre of everything and with the best will in the world, my nanny (and me) can't give her all the stimulation she needs and she is now getting to the point where she is growing out of the toddler groups (there is a bit of nazi three year old cut-off in my local ones).
I live and work in london and timing the commute to work and back is a bit of nightmare for both a nursery but no more than nanny as she works 8-6.
The reason I mention routine is that I am having a number of probs with DD1 (potty training issues, sleep etc) and I'm wondering whether the mix of 3 days with nanny, one day with me, one day with grandparents is too much (given she can't comprehend the concept of a week) and whether the routine of 5 daily pre-school sessions with nanny, me and granparents sharing the pick-up might be better.

I am finding this a difficult dilemma partly because my nanny does do a sterling job and I feel guilty that I might make a decision that will make her life difficult but also that the nanny option is financially a bit of killer for us.

Have considered child minders in past but unfortunately never been able to find one of the good ones (of which I'm sure there are many out there and actually in terms of a childcare model, childminder would be my preferred option). Also childcare has to be close to station/tube so I can make it to office in time and this has been a factor in not choosing childminder.

Ho hum.. really getting to point where I want to decide because really I should be doing work right now and not being otherwise distracted!

Lovely weekend all..

I like GIE's idea, AP and nursery combo.

Watch out with nurseries if you are having trouble with potty training. I picked DD up one night and she had wet herself three times, was barefoot cause she'd tinkled on her shoes, etc. I was meant to push her home in the pushchair socks and shoe-less. Others may cope better but I would really want to know they committed to asking and have enough staff to keep an eye on children who say "NO!" they don't need the loo even when really they do.

I'd say, given the ages of your DCs that then pre-school/nanny/you/grandparents combo is possibly the best compromise.

BUT I would say have a serious chat with your nanny about the routine/potty training/sleep issues - she should be working with you to ensure there is as little interruption to your DCs routine as possible.