Going back to work

[Tilpop]

I'm torn as to what to do. I worked full time before maternity leave and I'm due to go back in July.

The thing is I don't know if I want to. I've loved being with my little boy and I don't want to miss out on him learning and growing.

I still feel like I need "my thing" and adult interaction.

Husband says I don't have to go back (I think he doesn't want me to) he says I will be working to just pay childcare costs.

My work have said I can go back part time if it's possible.

I just don't know

What would you do?

Well obviously it's a totally personal choice but personally I would go back, maybe part-time - I always did 4 days a week and was lucky enough to have a relatively short commute and between DH and I we could make sure the kids rarely had to do very long days in nursery. I never felt I missed out on their 'learning and growing', if anything nursery/childminder did a much better job than I would have at doing exciting/stimulating activities with them in the day and I am absolutely certain I was a much better parent to them in evenings/weekends having a break from the endless drudgery of young children!

I do get the financial equation that comes with looking at the eye watering cost of childcare after maternity leave (and it only gets worse if you have more than 1 pre-schooler!) and it's easy enough to think 'I'm just working to pay nursery fees' and feel like your only option is to give up work, but in reality unless you work in a very low skill/minimum wage type role with nil prospects of progression it's nearly always the financially sensible thing to go back to work at least part time, even if your 'profit' after childcare costs compared to being a SAHM is minimal, you'll be paying into a pension and paying NI contributions which is beneficial to your future, plus keeping a foot in the door of work (it can be quite hard albeit not impossible to get back into work following 3-5 years of SAHM which is what is usually ends up being if you want to stay at home until youngest child is in school), keeping your skills and experience relevant and hopefully working towards a promotion or payrise which will mean your 'profit' from being at work increases. Even if that's unlikely/impossible in your field of work, your DC will only be in need of such expensive childcare for a relatively short time in the scale of your whole career and you may be eligible for some free childcare once he's 2 or 3, or certainly will go to school when he's 4/5, so childcare costs will for sure go down while hopefully your earnings will go up. If nothing else, if you're planning on a second child, it's often worth staying in work in between DC to make sure you're eligible for mat pay for the 2nd DC, in particular if your employer offers enhanced pay, even if you then opt for a period of SAHM after that...

Of course not saying it's not a perfectly good choice to be a SAHP if that's what you really want to do but doesn't sound like it really?

It is completely personal. Most woman go to work to pay for childcare unfortunately. However there's a lot more to it than that.

Pros:

• it is 'you time' and time for you to have adult engagement.
• you're contributing to a pension scheme when working, saving for the future.
• babies aren't babies forever. Once they've grown up you might find it hard to get back into work. If you continue you working on a part time basis it means there are no gaps in your CV.
• your own income and independence.
• there are a lot of benefits to children going to nursery and having different interaction.

That said there are a lot of pros to been at home as well!!

Part time can be the best of both worlds IMO.

Personally for me I like to keep my foot in the door work wise and earn a bit of my own money. But I'm a nurse so I would have to retrain if I didn't practice for a number of years. Part time seems like it may suit you, I'm due any day now with #3 and still plan to go back to work next year, even though DH said it would make more sense financially for me to be a SAHM. But whatever you decide to do is your choice and has to suit you and your needs. Good luck whatever you decide

Go bank to work OP.

1. Bring at home is very lonely
2. It's NOT your husbands decision.

3.Never give your financial dependence up 4.,YOU won't be working to pay childcare- he will be paying 50% of it!!

1. Part time will keep your foot in the door should ANYTHING happen to you dh or his job.