Nannies-did you get anything for Christmas from your families?

[Darklylookingdeeply]

I am can't help feeling slightly gutted that I didn't even get a card. I think it's worse that some years I have been given gifts, some years nothing. It makes me feel like it's performance related or something. Maybe I was shit this year😁

I got a nice coffee mug and a couple of books about things that really interest me - nothing mega expensive, but the fact that they'd thought about what I would like meant a lot.
I've never had a big cash present or Christmas bonus in any of the jobs I've had.

The worst present I had was one Christmas, the family were going away for Christmas so the parents were giving the children their presents beforehand and they asked if I would like to stay for a drink and "exchange presents", I gave the children presents from me and the mum and dad sort of looked at each other as if to say 'were we supposed to buy a present for her?' then they handed me a box of chocolates from the sideboard, no wrapping paper, no card. They were actually quite nice chocolates but it was the idea that I wasn't appreciated enough to have had a gift bought or even a hand made card from the kids.
Money wasn't an issue - there were lots of expensive, beautifully wrapped gifts under the tree for family and friends.

Ah, thanks for the update, @Darklylookingdeeply .

They do sound thoughtless: it's really important to show people they they're valued, and even more so when you are operating as part of daily family life.

I'd be feeling unappreciated in your shoes.

@Darklylookingdeeply, the French house is empty a lot of the time. I let All of my family and friends and cleaner who only has adult children and do often goes at end of June or beginning of July. I don't let it out do it would be just sitting there empty. It doesn't cost me anything to share.

I have “furloughed” my cleaner on full pay this last year, she popped over near Christmas to drop the kids a gift, and we gave her a nice scarf and put £200 in the bank for her.

How thoughtless of them. I've never had a nanny but always gave my Childminder nice gifts.

God, I think I've been working for the wrong people!You are all so generous! I did have one job where the gifts were amazing. They were bloody awful though! I have never felt more like 'staff' anywhere I've worked, if you know what I mean.
@NannyR I have had this too. 'Shit, give her that bottle of wine!' because they clearly forgot. To invite you to a 'present exchange' and still not think to buy anything is exceptional though!

We always do a week's salary and a modest gift - a bottle of fizz or something we think she would use. Ours has been a huge help through the home schooling shit show of 2020 and we wanted to show our appreciation.

@eurochick I would be over-the-moon if my employers did that!
I felt quite sad about my lack of appreciation to start with and like I had done something wrong, but now I'm over it.
There is no way to fathom why people behave the way they do and I will try not to take it to heart.

We always do 1-2 weeks salary + really nice bottle of fizz. Likewise for the cleaner do half months rate + fizz/nice lotion etc. also furloughed cleaner on regular rate. We’ve depressingly benefitted substantially from the pandemic and it feels unreasonable not to maintain our commitments to people who make our lives easier.

Really poor on their part. Why would you not give a gift to someone who is so important to your children?

@Happyhappyday

We always do 1-2 weeks salary + really nice bottle of fizz. Likewise for the cleaner do half months rate + fizz/nice lotion etc. also furloughed cleaner on regular rate. We’ve depressingly benefitted substantially from the pandemic and it feels unreasonable not to maintain our commitments to people who make our lives easier.

You sound lovely

Out of curiosity when have you benefitted substantially

That’s awful op! Even at their least generous I’ve had better presents from bosses than that! This year was the best- I had a weeks salary, bottle of champagne, and a few other bits as well as homemade cards etc.

I had a similar thing happen last year, have always had really (overly) generous employers until last year when I got absolutely nothing from my new ish family. I arrived at their door with a bottle of wine for the parents, toys for the kids and a card, they didn’t even seem embarrassed that they hadn’t gotten me anything. I don’t think it’s anything to do with performance though, some people are just lazy or not very thoughtful. This family loved me and sang my praises. They also got me nothing when they moved away in the summer, again I got the kids going away gifts but got nothing in return. I think it is rude tbh but then again I’ve also worked for awful employers and spoilt kids who were generous with gifts but I dreaded my job everyday.