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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

6 month old sleeping at childminders

16 replies

Sweetpea1989 · 07/12/2020 15:33

Im a FTM this is all new to me. My 6 month old tends to have a morning, lunch and afternoon nap. Shes not a great napper and can take a bit of work or a couple of attempts to get her to sleep.

She was at the childminders 9 - 3 today, and when she dropped her off she had 40 min in the car while she ran errands first thing, and nothing since, she was just nodding off in the car when she got dropped off at 3pm. I know she said she sometimes does lunchtime drop offs/pick ups and today the childminder has 3 toddlers as well as my LO.

Should I be worried she didn't get her lunch time nap? The childminder described her as 'a bit crabby' and wanting to be on her knee all the time.

Shes only going to the childminders here and there, no more than 3 days a week, sometimes 9-1 sometimes 9-3.

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Original poster

Sweetpea1989 · 07/12/2020 15:36

Sorry that should say when she picked her up at 9am she had 40 min in the car.

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KitKat1985 · 07/12/2020 15:40

It can be really hard to get a child to sleep in a new environment when they are out of routine, and when the childminder is also having to look after other kids. Your DD is probably at the age where she'll soon start to drop down to 2 naps a day anyway, so I wouldn't worry too much.

DragonOnFire · 07/12/2020 15:50

Don't worry too much about the naps if your baby is getting used to the new routine and environment. Has she been going to the childminders long?
I would take the rough days with the smooth, as hopefully today was just a busy day for your CM and next time they can both stay at home and your baby hopefully get a nap in a cot?
Our DS went to nursery at 6 months old and he definitely stayed awake longer with all the stimulation, plus no breastfeeding to doze off to. But he was also capable of having quite long naps (3 hours sometimes) while he was there on days he was tired.
If she is going to be busy and running around with errands ask the time then is she basically planning for your baby to sleep in the car seat? I don't think I'd be happy with that as a long-term situation.

FestiveChristmasLights · 07/12/2020 15:51

Three toddlers and a baby is too many for a childminder unless continuation of care or a helper.

Original poster

Sweetpea1989 · 07/12/2020 15:56

Thanks for your replies, shes had a couple of settling in sessions 10-2, and came back shattered, she said she slept once but not the other.

I just don't know if i'm worrying for no reason, if i should highlight concerns to the childminder (don't want to look like a neurotic mother, we live in a small village and don't want to upset anyone.)

As I said shes a crap napper with me so I was half expecting this, would lack of sleep do her any harm? Shes only doing about 6 sessions a month with her so its not like its 9-5 mon-fri.

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Original poster

Sweetpea1989 · 07/12/2020 16:56

We had a right job getting her to nap when she got back, kept trying 3 -4 and we finally got 20 mins out of her at 4:15pm.

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Bamaluz · 07/12/2020 18:29

If she's only at the childminder's occasionally she has no chance of getting in a routine there so I don't think you should say anything.
Just accept that a bit of disruption to her normal sleep pattern is to be expected and it won't do any harm at all.

Original poster

Sweetpea1989 · 07/12/2020 18:38

That’s great thanks for the advice.

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GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat · 07/12/2020 18:42

She won’t be deliberately withholding her nap, it’s easier all round if she does nap so cm will be doing her best. If you yourself struggle to get her to settle (you said we so at least 2 people) then the cm by herself and three toddles will understandably find it tricky.

Original poster

Sweetpea1989 · 07/12/2020 18:52

I totally agree it’s not easy with lord knows how she copes with three! I’m a first time mum without much support so I don’t know what’s normal to expect :)

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mooncakes · 07/12/2020 23:25

If she's just doing random days, sometimes 9-1 and sometimes 9-3, then the CM isn't going to be able to get her into a routine.

PleaseLetIanBeDead · 07/12/2020 23:30

A childminder often has to do multiple school / nursery runs and has children of different ages, sometimes a very big age gap with completely different needs.

Alot of childminders just haven't got the time for 1:1 to keep trying to put your baby to sleep.

Maybe a nanny will be more suitable, although obviously alot more expensive

Maryann1975 · 08/12/2020 14:18

I agree with what others have said, if your dc is going to the cm that infrequently it will be harder for her to get a routine going there. How do you normally get your baby to sleep at home? Some methods parents use really won’t be suitable for when your dc is in childcare eg, if your baby needs rocking or patting for half an hour in a completely silent room, a childminder or nursery isn’t going to be able to accommodate that. Also, think about the times your dc is with the cm. she might not have the time to be getting baby to sleep At 11.45 as she would be doing lunches for the others and if baby is going at 1, it’s not worth trying to get them down at 12.30 for parent to come along and wake them pretty much straight away. The longer you can leave her there (so the full 9-3), the more chance cm has of working with your baby to find a way to get her to nap.

It doesn’t sound like your baby was hysterical through lack of sleep, so I think you will just have to go with it on the days your baby is at the cms and accept that The evening routine will be harder as your baby is tired.
Also, lots of people think that 4 under 5 sounds too much and for some cms it is, but some cms are quite capable of managing these numbers, it really depends on the dc and their personalities and how well they all get on together.

jannier · 08/12/2020 20:58

@FestiveChristmasLights
Thats not correct.....the Eyfs list some examples like continuity of care but it says in circumstances including and not limited to....and you could have up to 6 as it doesn't say 4 or 5 just that you must never go over a total of 6 under 8. Why you would want to I dont know but I guess if they are all nearer 5 and its an exception like a nursery being closed in an emergency then you might.....but 4 under 3 is not hard if your experienced and organised especially if you know the children.

jannier · 08/12/2020 21:03

Op....its taken me 2 months to settle a baby born in lockdown initially he didn't sleep more than 20 minutes in a 9 hour day....nothing to do with going out or school runs.....this week he's done 2 days of 2 hour sleeps....mum only gets 45 minutes at a time sleeping on her and he's always awake 3 or 4 times a night. Give it time.

Original poster

Sweetpea1989 · 09/12/2020 20:17

Thanks @jannier sounds like you have a fab way with little ones.

I honestly didn’t know if missing a nap would do any serious damage to baby as it’s such a hot topic, but if all that happens is she’s cranky I can deal with that for a handful of days, I know I have to be open to childcare doing things differently, and I have every confidence the benefits of a new environment and older kiddies to watch will do her the world of good. Pros and cons eh?

Hopefully as she gets older and settled more into a predictable napping pattern it will get easier....she hopes!

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