want to give up childminding

[ohbequite]

please excuse the name change but am a regular on here.

just had enough!

parents expect me not to care if they pay me 3 days late every week! and not to care if ALWAYS late.

had enough of kids here at 7.30 screaming !
kids that want food all day long.
kids that bite other kids.
kids that are rude and uncontrolable.

just want out !!!

sorry for ranting. please tell me you sometimes feel this way.

I think anyone working with children (and their parents) has bad days/weeks/months.
Sorry to hear things have been especially bad for you recently.

I feel very much like that at the moment. Don't know if you've seen any of my threas recently about ?E-coli.

I have to admit that all my parents have been good about paying on time, only needed the occasional reminders about payment etc, but sometimes the childrens behaviours get me down.

But I know that in a couple of weeks the big cloud over my head will have gone, the kids will behave and then I'll think it's the best job in the world!

Have you spoken to the parents about paying late and being late ? It's unacceptable. Maybe they are used to you not complaining so just think you will take it. How would they feel if their bosses paid them late ? You need to have a word, let them know its seriously effecting how much you enjoy the job and making you want to quit! And yes I have felt that way before, so I eventually got rid of those particular late payers, nasty parents, and replaced with nice ones. Not easy though I know.

Its not the children or the parents that get to me, its bloody OFSTED! How many rules & regulations and terms and conditions have we discussed today for example. Everyday it seems we think of another clause to add. Today its been CP. The paper work is unbelieveable. I don't know if you talk to me, but I have said several times that 'I'm out of here' because of OFSTED, it just isn't fun anymore. I love all my mindees and all their parents, but I just can't do it anymore.

So sorry that you feel this way about the kids though. Have you just had a really sh*tty couple of weeks? It goes like that, I had it last week. DH was not happy about kids being all over the place, DD couldn't consentrate on her homework etc. This week, however, has been good. I was shown that I was appreciated by 2 of my parents.

If you really can't draw a line under whats been getting you down, you need to think about a change. If you're in the staff room regularly, I'll miss you, but you have to do whats right for you and your family.

Heelo Ohbequite,
I am not a CM but I am a parent who has a CM for my DD2, and I 've never paid her late, not once, well, just once that my bank manage to give me a pin number for the incorrect account, but even then, I went later in the day, as my husband gave me the money to pay her. Just give the parent a warning about paying late, or either they pay on time, or they'll have to pay in advance.

Sorry you feel this way I've only ever had one mindee with bad behaviour and when it was obvious his home life was the main cause and things weren't going to change, I gave notice!

If you don't like starting at 7.30, you can change that if you change your working hours.

I very very recently felt like quitting because of a parent (if you're regular, you may have seen my thread about poorly baby). I hate being treated the way I am sometimes but luckily all in all, I'm loving my job and have missed it this week (been closed).

Do you think if you changed hours, gave notice to kids causing problems, were paid by standing order so couldn't be late etc. that you'd be happy? If yes then maybe have a look at 'changing' things rather than quitting. HOWEVER, if you think that you still wouldn't enjoy it and that looking after children all day is just too much then yes, I think you should quit.

thanks mums, just had a really bad week. monday morning one of my school run mindees fell over and grazed all her face. friday at playgroup my 2 yr old mindee was hit in the face by another child, big mark on her face. feel so responsible. nothing i could of done to prevent either situation. on top of that have a really badly behaved 4 yr old mindee (tantrums the lot) just not always sure job worth £3.50 an hour. but i know if i carry on feeling like this will give up as not fair on anyone especially the children. this is one job you just cant do unless 100% happy doing. people notice! especially the children. maybe just need a holiday.

ohbequite I'm feeling exactly the same as you. I've had a really stressful year with my mother, for whom I am primary carer. Then various children left, (starting school, Mum on maternity, dad lost job)I am struggling to replace them. One of my best ever mindees finishes next week and I'm close to tears over that.

I have held a place open since July for a family member, they said they had applied for a retainer to their childcare grant officer, I thought this would cover that period but they meant half fee during their hols from uni..which I can't afford. Then they've cut the hours they are willing to pay for.

In the midst of this I have had shingles (very mild and caught in time by antiviral drugs luckily)so had a week off. So i haven't dealt with the family situation and feel as though I just can't be strong enough to do it.
And my mum's housing benefit has disappeared into the ether so I have to sort that out..she wishes she was dead..

I do agree that this job does so depend on how you are feeling, and what a difference it makes to be appreciated by parents. Late payment makes me so, so cross. It's hard to have direct contact with very different parenting styles, you feel as though you are very strict about behaviour, manners, eating at the table etc, what clothes are appropriate for different weather conditions etc.

Please tell me that I'll remember why I do this...that I'll get a phonecall later to say my reputation has spread and family want to come to see me to look after a 2 yr old and a 3 yr old fulltime!!

Maybe I'll get to go on holiday next year if that happens!!

Sorry for ranting, it's just my family must be so sick of me whining, it's good to vent on here. I think though that I need to get some solutions in place to deal with all this stuff that's going on. I saw the 'advertising' thread earlier in the week and am going to spend an hour this afternoon looking at and working out the best way to drum up some custom. EM

Sorry was so long!

hi earthymama.

sorry you are having a bad time too. really hope it all turns around for you soon.

you know what im also getting quite stressed about. filling vacancees. a c/m friend has been advertising for 7 months and nothing! so much competition from nurseries in my area. 3 have opened up in the last 4 years. 2 holding up to 100 children!

and all the paper work.

maybe us c/m just need to let off steam a bit more and stop pretending we're mary poppins! hope you have a good week.

I am a parent who has used minders for two and a half years and i have never ever ever been late ever paying my minders. I had one who fined late paying parents. harsh but effective! At the end of the day if their bosses didnt pay them they would have something to say about it so you have every right to refuse to mind their children for every day you are missing your money for. Disgraceful behaviour if you ask me.

prettyfly1; yes i know. if they didnt get paid it would be a different story.
thankfully only a few parents are like this. the vast majority are fine.

Am glad I am not the only childminder who is the same position as some of you lot ie not beeing able to fill places and parents who pay late or don't like paying full fees when their child is off.

I also read your posting Mayreen, OFSTED have totally spoilt our job, they are slowly forcing us to be like nurseries with this Early Years Foundation Stage training, observations and assessments etc. Parents choose us because we are like a home, if they want all that they can go to a nursery. I have NVQ Level 3 but am still only on £3.50 per hour.

Sometimes I wish I was in a job out of the home but my 5 yr old comes first.