Childminder/nursery/nanny...help!

[Rosecottage888]

Currently on mat leave with 9 week old DS. I will need to return to work in March when he will be 8 months and we are starting to look at options now but I have no idea which service would be best for his age!

Please could anyone help with what was best for your little ones when you went back to work? We would need an 8-6 type arrangement for 4 days as my mum will be able to have him one day a week.

Thanks in advance

I don't think you should go back to work full time, I think it really impacts their development. Perhaps try and go back part time and look for a nanny. :)

@Lydiamallettkeyworth

I don't think you should go back to work full time, I think it really impacts their development. Perhaps try and go back part time and look for a nanny. :)

@Lydiamallettkeyworth based on what? Maybe her husband could go part time if it’s so essential.

Nursery for me. Couldn't cope with idea of child minder holidays and sickness.

@Lydiamallettkeyworth would you like to pay my bills so I can go back part time?

[quote Rosecottage888]@Lydiamallettkeyworth would you like to pay my bills so I can go back part time?

[/quote]
I just think it's a bit irresponsible. But of course your choice :) it's the things we do when they're younger that play out majorly when they're older. I and my husband @Keyworth85 have always prioritised our daughter before work. It's just a matter of priorities. Have a reflection. X

Yes either or is fine! I just think it's clear part time hasn't been thought about. Really it should because kids are so perceptive and pick up on this. :)

But why is it “a bit irresponsible”? There have been absolutely tonnes of academic studies that have considered this precise question. Can you point to anything to support your view @Lydiamallettkeyworth or are you just making it up as you go along?

Of course we all make our own choices, but that doesn’t give you the right to claim the OP may be damaging her child in later life by putting them in childcare now.

I don't think there's a blanket 'best' option - it's so individual. We chose a nursery because the only childminders available to us would have required him to go on a LOT of playgroup and school runs spending hours a day in the buggy for other kids to be taken and picked up here and there. But that's not at all childminders at all.
Also our nursery had loads of outdoor space, lots of time in nature, creative play on a larger scale than we could do at home. Again, that's not all nurseries and some we visited felt cramped and claustrophobic to me.

@FolkSongSweet

But why is it “a bit irresponsible”? There have been absolutely tonnes of academic studies that have considered this precise question. Can you point to anything to support your view *@Lydiamallettkeyworth* or are you just making it up as you go along?

Of course we all make our own choices, but that doesn’t give you the right to claim the OP may be damaging her child in later life by putting them in childcare now.

Sure. I am a post doctoral researcher at a Neural Network Institute for Childhood Development. My PhD prior to this was around researching neural pathways in childhood and how malleable it is based upon parenting choices. I find this stuff incredibly interesting. PM me if you want to read some of the research.

She is being very irresponsible. The child subconsciously recognises her absence, in lots of different ways. She clearly hasn't even considered part time as an option before looking at these options is downright selfish. But each to their own. I just feel passionate about this :)

@Lydiamallettkeyworth how do you know I haven't considered part time? Please don't make assumptions. My OP didn't ask for opinions on whether I should return to work FT or not, it was asking for opinions on the best childcare available.

[quote Rosecottage888]@Lydiamallettkeyworth how do you know I haven't considered part time? Please don't make assumptions. My OP didn't ask for opinions on whether I should return to work FT or not, it was asking for opinions on the best childcare available.[/quote]
You may have done, sorry. It's just your first post was badly spelled and articulated; it just didn't come across that you'd even thought about all the options properly. Good luck thoughts

Lydiamallettkeyworth a horrible, callous, judgemental character assassination of working parents. “We put our child first”- eugh! It’s a nursery not a work house! Some people have no choice, and some people have a choice and still go back to work, if you want to think you are superior for your decisions, that your child is better rounded then do but keep it to yourself rather than chucking a load of (primarily mother) guilt on others!

@Lydiamallettkeyworth your own spelling and grammar isn’t shit hot either. Maybe reread your own posts.

Interesting that you apparently have a job and also children. How did you manage that?

Thank you to all the helpful posters 🙂

Just ignore @Lydiamallettkeyworth
She's just Another smug self righteous STAHP who feels the need to lord it over the rest of us. My DD has been in full time childcare since small - she's far more confidant, articulate and further along in her reading and writing than the kids I know who are with STAHPs

Personally we prioritised paying the mortgage and not being homeless over giving up our jobs so I don't see how that is being selfish

@Lydiamallettkeyworth...
Did your research include real people with real issues like the stress of putting food on tables obtained from food banks, the depressed dealing with possibly homelessness, depression caused by lack of self worth, Esteem etc....or thoes who spend most of their day not lovingly playing and relating to their child but cleaning watching TV or on their phones....a sweeping statement that seems to assume all parenting is equal. Rather than it being quality of care over quantity.

We have a childminder for my DD who is 8 months, she loves it and i love it!

Lydia have you just made that up?

Wow @Lydiamallettkeyworth

Lay on the guilt. Many parents work full time and are happy secure confident children

@Rosecottage888 depends on budget

Cm and nursery about the same. Nanny more costly but no need to wake dress and take child to childcare .. nanny will also do childs washing and cooking and freeze some meals and obv look after an ill child

That’s the huge big difference v nanny v cm and nursery

It really depends, all have pluses and minuses, and depends as well on availability in your area. I worked full time, and DS was with a childminder until he was 2, just for 3 days though, we were fortunate enough to have help from family for the other 2 days, she only worked 3 otherwise we would have probably done 4 or 5. I chose her as DS loved being outside and exploring, anywhere with trees, flowers and mud he was delighted. Although nurseries do go outside, she had NT membership, and they went out everyday even if just to the park and for a woodland walk. Holidays weren't a huge issue for me as I just took them when she did (she gave at least 6 weeks notice) as work was flexible, and she wasn't off sick at all; but worth considering if you would be able to deal with that. When he turned 2 we decided to move to nursery because we needed longer days, and it was the right time I think. Remember though that whatever you do you can change your mind, there will be a notice period and not saying to mess people around, but if you find what you think will work best and it doesn't, you can try something else. I haven't used a nanny, if you can afford it though then worth looking into.

Lydiamallettkeyworth
Absolutely no need to poke your nose into the OPs business. She asked about childcare, NOT opinions on full or part time work
You have just no business branding any mother irresponsible for their hours of work.
You also had no business getting a sly dig in at the OPs spelling. Please "have a reflection at your own spelling and also how horrible your comments on this thread have been