Childminders kitchen and bathroom unclean

[Benji17]

Hi, I have recently moved area and had to find my son a new childminder. After visiting a few I settled on one that my son and I really liked and she seemed really good with him and had lots of great toys etc. Because of covid-19 when we first did our viewing/meeting we only went into her back garden but I could see through to her living room which seemed tidy and had a baby gate on the doorway that led to the rest of the house. Since then I have taken my son back to sign the contract. This time we went indoors and I immediately noticed the part of the house where the kids do not spend their time is fairly dirty. I didn't think too much of this as I knew my son would be in the living room which was clean. However when I took my son to the bathroom I noticed the bathroom was really quite dirty, as in their were yellow stains on the toilet seat and it was generally quite grimey, on our way back I did also notice the kitchen had a lot of unwashed dishes and a lot of clutter on the worktops. She does take the kids out during the day but she does also cook meals for them obviously in the kitchen.

I'm just wondering if I'm being a little overly picky or if I should be concerned.

Other than the kitchen and bathroom being unclean we really like her.

I’d be concerned about that. It suggests a lack of hygiene.

If she is making meals for your son and he has to use the toilet then no you are not being picky.

Thanks for your replies, I just don't know what to say now. I have signed the contract but I haven't paid the deposit yet. How do I tell her the house isn't clean enough!?! And can I just not give the deposit now the contract is signed?

Hi, I would say by not paying the deposit automatically makes the contract invalid. If a deposit had been paid and then you change your mind you would not get the deposit back.

Another way to look at it is...Is it a busy childminding setting?
Was the kitchen actually dirty or just messy as she had not had time to wash up before you came round? A cluttered kitchen and a few unwashed dishes would not bother me if the rest of the house is clean and tidy . Like wise with the bathroom how many children had she had in that day?

Hmm, there is a difference between lots of unwashed dishes in the kitchen because she has been busy with the children all day or because she is lazy and isn’t bothered about cleaning. What time of day did you visit? If she had just finished work after a full day with 6 dc, I would be more understanding, but if she had finished work at 5 and your visit was at 6, I would expect better.
Tbh, I wouldn’t be happy with a dirty toilet anytime of the day. Knowing you were visiting, she should have checked the bathroom was clean. She should be doing this periodically through the day anyway. Children are notorious for leaving accidents or not flushing properly. I’ve had visits straight after work and cleaning the toilet and trying to make the kitchen presentable are my main priorities.

The play spaces are always Hygienically clean. They may not be tidy, Sometimes look like a bomb has gone off, but they are always clean, so I wouldn’t prioritise these areas before a visit.

So she hadn't had any kids in that day and usually only has 3 in at any one time she does have a few older kids herself. I think I'll just have to cancel but I feel terrible telling her that it's too dirty. I also thought if it was that it usually was clean but just wasn't at the time of visit and she hadn't got around to it she would have said something like "oh sorry the kitchens a mess I've just been busy this morning and haven't got round to it" if it wasn't usually like that.

The kitchen is not too much of an issue famiy life and older kids mean washing up goes on and sinks overflow....before she cooks she should clean down.
The bathroom would do it for me.
Check your contract is there a settling in period....Pacey have it on the back it explains your not committed during this time and can end the contract.

As a childminder myself, my kitchen is cleaned regularly during the day and my toilet is also cleaned daily.

If she hadn’t been working on the day you went to sign contracts and it was still dirty Just imagine what it would look like when she’s got a house full of kids too 😬 my house is always clean and tidy when new parents come to visit.

I know it’s hard to say but if you aren’t going to use her it’s probably better just to tell her the truth, hopefully she will completely understand why and it may help to improve the hygiene

I’m not at all picky but I have to agree that it’s an indication her hygiene standards aren’t high enough - she knew you were visiting, it should be clean even if not 100% tidy. Our first childminder always kept things really clean and tidy - much better than our house! - because it was her place of work, she was prepping & serving meals, and parents are in and out every day. She employed a cleaner to help. Our second childminder wasn’t as tidy but by then the DC were school age, took a packed tea and spent most of the time playing out, so it was a different standard and type of care.

Thanks for your input everyone! I've emailed her and let her know nicely that we won't be sending him and it's because of the hygiene concerns. She seems so nice and deserves to know why we've backed out. Hopefully she won't take it badly!!

@Benji17 did you email the childminder? What was her response?

I used to be childminder and I would be mortified to hear this!! I was always super conscious of people visiting and would 'extra' clean so never had any issues. I do however have a friend who sounds just like you and she's a very naturally messy person but was always super fussy when the children ate and washed their hands before. She was super fussy about stuff on the sofas etc which I used to think odd considering the state of the house but the kids were always cleaned and looked after well!!

She sounded just like her, not you!!

There’s a difference between messy and unclean.

For me messy is ok, unclean isn’t. Like a PP said I would make sure my house is extra clean is a potential customer was visiting, so if it looked like that on a day a parent came in, I would say you made the right decision IMO