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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

If a mindee ruined your cot and it was unusable, what would you do?

186 replies

QueenEagle · 25/08/2007 12:06

2.5 year old ds is put in a travel cot for his afternoon nap. The other day he pulled off his pull up full of poo and covered the cot in it, getting it in the mesh and on the fabric. Minder says it is impossible to clean therefore unusable.

She wants me to replace it and says she has no insurance to cover such a loss.

Am I liable??????

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

fawkeoff · 26/08/2007 12:26

franny you are talking out of your arse.Childminders are not poorly paid at all, and the child is a toddler at 2.5....do people forget the stages that toddlers go through???? they just take their nappy off all the bloody time,it cant be helped its a learning process!!!!,she could have just cleaned the bloody thing instead of using extorsion

beansprout · 26/08/2007 12:29

Hey, don't be so harsh on F&Z, she is just making a reasonable point!

If we aren't allowed to discuss poo smearing on MN in a civilised manner, then what has the world come to?!!

Shoshable · 26/08/2007 12:35

I was one of the CM's that said that the CM should replace it herself, but OMG childminders most places are poorly paid, I dont know any that charge more than the minimum hourly age rate! and yes some do have more than one child, but try looking in the staff room, to see how many of us are struggling, and before anyone jumps on me, Yes I know I am one of the ones that are not.

fawkeoff · 26/08/2007 12:37

fair enough i retract the paid bit in my post....but you know its really unfair to be asked to replace something like that

BradfordMum · 26/08/2007 12:38

I think that all childminders are different - as are all parents.

This happened to me a couple of years ago. I told the mum, who was mortified. She whipped the cot out of my house and tipped it. The following day she arrived with a brand new cot for me. It was HER choice, and I was very greatful.

Surely, this is not about just whether the CM is out of order, but also how the OP reacts to what her own child has done.

This is jusy MY opinion.

Sally x

FrannyandZooey · 26/08/2007 12:59

Thanks beansprout

Fawkeoff no need to be so rude

I would really advise that QE works this out with the CM for the sake of their good relationship. It isn't worth falling out over a travel cot IMO. You people who think the CM is being dishonest - are you not concerned about QE leaving her child there in the future?

FrannyandZooey · 26/08/2007 13:04

JV I agree children are unpredictable, which is why the CM is paid to watch over them

however most children aged 2.5 do NOT take off their nappies when in bed and smear the contents. I know some children do, but it isn't something I would expect if asked to look after someone's elses child without warning. If my child did this, I would warn the CM and try to put them in clothing where it wasn't possible for them to get the nappy off (I know some children are great escape artists). If my 2.5 y o did this unexpectedly I would be mortified and offer to replace the cot.

I've worked with children for nearly 15 years btw. As we seem to be taking childcarers' opinions more seriously than other people's

Aitch · 26/08/2007 13:17

i'd definitely offer to clean it myself, i must say, you'd really have to get a scrubbing brush out and do it in a garden and i'm not sure that i would expect a childminder to do it in her 'off' time. if there's one in kiddicare for £30 then i'd suggest going halfers if you can't get it clean. if she really didn't want to i'd pay the mney and forget all about it. she's a good CM, that's the bottom line. don't let something this trivial spoil that relationship.

belgo · 26/08/2007 13:31

my dd1 did this at her creche, and there was never any suggestion that I should clean it up or replace it, they were incredibly reasonable about it. They told me quite a few children do this at some point, but I still felt guilty.

NannyL · 26/08/2007 13:47

IMO although not all children smeer poo everywhere, many do, so many that its considered normal

it is not that odd for a 2.5 year old to smeer poo everywhere, and also obviously you dont watch children while they sleep

To even suggest that the child new he was doing something wrong so the mum shoudl pay is absurd.

Its a normal thing for some 2 year old to do.... and childminder should not ask to pay

some children have major tantrums... some dont
some run off given half a chance... otehrs never do
some children put everything in their mouths for years, others dont
some children enjoy smearing poo, and some dont

ALL completely normal for a child, and just cause some dont do it, doesnt mean that no child should or would cause many normal 1 and 2 year olds do!

alibubbles · 26/08/2007 14:35

I've been a childminder for 21 years and have dealt with all sort. It's part of the job, I'd just get on and clean it.

I had a child puke up recently in my brand new car seat, and I mean really puke! I just had to grin and bear it and clean it up, Vomit emoticon!

I'd do the same with a travel cot, but then I wouldn't have a 2.5 year old in pull ups or nappies,( unless special needs of any sort) but that is another contentious point!

A comment today in the paper talks about children starting school unreliable in their toileting habits at 4.5 years old, - well in my opinion people are lazy and leave it far too late training these days.

I have minded over 50 children and all have been dry and clean by their second birthday, including lots of boys. My own DS was clean and dry at night at 18 months old.

There is a window of opportunity at 18-20 months and most parents choose to ignore it as it seems to much hassle.

C/M could have it professionally cleaned at offset the cost in her wear and tear.

UCM · 26/08/2007 14:42

Duct tape, didn't vvv use it, that's the answer.

fawkeoff · 26/08/2007 14:45

sorry franny....pms and a hangover

belgo · 26/08/2007 14:53

oow alibubles - strong stuff about the potty training!

policywonk · 26/08/2007 14:55

I think duct tape for potty training purposes is a bit strong, UCM

turquoise · 26/08/2007 15:00

Agree with Aitch and Franny. I would have certainly offered to clean it myself, and if it could not be cleaned, at least compromise on replacement cost.

Rather surprised at the vehemence towards CM by most of the posters tbh.

Fireflyfairy2 · 26/08/2007 15:05

My ds did this before he was potty trained!

He was in c/minders bedroom & smeared it all over his own clothes, her wall, the bed clothes, his shoes & the cot.

She told me when I picked him up & asked why he had on his extra set of clothes! I was mortified & kept saying sorry.

She said not to worry, she washed the bed clothes & washed the cot, put a bit of flash spray on the walls & all was fine again.

Surely she can wash it, I don't understand what her problem is.

belgo · 26/08/2007 15:07

it's probably more common a problem then any of us know, due to the fact that no one ever talks about it. It's not something I've every told anyone in RL.

FioFio · 26/08/2007 15:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

belgo · 26/08/2007 15:12

there are lots of unpleasant things about children. There are lots of unpleasant jobs. But in a lot of jobs you can't pick and choose the nice bits.

belgo · 26/08/2007 15:13

if I throw out a cot every thime it got poo on it I'd have gone through about five cots.

fawkeoff · 26/08/2007 15:14

i understand that poo isnt the nicest thing to be cleaning...but im sure she's had her experience in cleaning it as we all have,i dont see what was wrong in her attempting to clean it first before asking for money to replace it.

nappyaddict · 26/08/2007 15:27

i think she is a childminder and she has to accept that these things happen. if it had happened in a nursery would they expect you to pay for it? i doubt it very much.

on the vest thing - these used to do big sizes. it doesn't look like they've got any in stock at the moment but you could give them a ring? also woolworths do them in 2-3 i think.

NutterlyUts · 26/08/2007 15:43

Thats life though Fio.. We all have to do unpleasant things, some of us within our jobs, but we just have to get stuck in.

At the end of the day, QE is paying this lady to look after her child, in loco parentis, and so, that means doing all the things a parent would do while that child is under her care. And in this case, cleaning poo is one of those things

nappyaddict · 26/08/2007 15:43

oh and if you can't find them in 2-3, get 18-24 months and some vest extenders.

whoever said all toddlers should be potty trained by 2 is talking tosh aswell. you can train this age but it often takes lots of hard work, many accidents and could take months. i've often seen it cause confidence issues when the child can't seem to manage it and the parent keeps pushing it and any progress they have made regresses. if the child isn't ready it is much better to wait. when i think of the few toddlers i know, the ones who tried to train at 2 had a long battle, the ones who trained nearer to 3 grasped it in a day or 2.

and on the other side of the coin i wasn't dry until i was 4 cos i had a small bladder which had to be stretched, but obviously when i was 2 everyone just thought my mum was lazy

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