Nervous about baby starting with a child minder

[Hopehope20]

Hi,
My baby is almost 11 months. I return to work on Tuesday and he starts with a childminder who he will go to for 3 days a week.

I really like her so that's good...I've just worried myself sick over how he will adapt. I've convinced myself he won't nap (with me it takes white noise...black out blind)where as there it will be in a room with other children playing etc. He is a bit if a fussy feeder so again...I've convinced myself he won't eat. I have this huge overwhelming guilt about leaving him and I feel awful to think that on the first day I take him there he might not think I am coming back.

Am I over reacting? In general do children actually adapt much more easily than parents expect? He is a confident and very social boy....but with no family around I have not left him with anyone other than his dad so it has built up to be a big thing for me. I have so much fun with him and now I just feel so sad as each day ends and Tuesday gets closer.

Any nice stories you could share would be so helpful. Thank you xx

Get a mini cctv camera in your home x no need to tell her just observe u will feel better then c

Your worries are very normal, I've been there - leaving child with childminder and am a childminder myself.

Children do adapt very quickly. I always put babies down for a proper nap in a cot in a quiet room. I've had babies who didn't nap, but eased them into a kind routine.

Sometimes they cry when you pick them up... because they just realised they missed you.

Children will often eat better when they are part of a bigger group.

The guilt, we all have it. I used to cry leaving mine, but she was so happy with her childminder I had a job getting her out of there!

Three days working is a good balance, you will enjoy the times you have even more.

Blissa1 it is illegal to video anyone without their knowledge.

Snd the baby is going to a childminder in the childminders own home.

Anyway now I have that iff my chest. I was a CM for almost 40 years. You will be surprised what a baby/child will do for a CM that they wont do for mum. I only very occasionally had a child who wouldn't sleep through other children playing in another room. And I walked the school run so some napped on that in the buggy or carry cot. If he is sociable he may well be tired when you get him home to start with, not from lack of sleep but from all the new exciting things to do. The CM should give you report at the end of the day, mine got a daily diary that went back and forth between home and childcare. In it were all feeds, naps and a quick update on what they did that day.
With food, again they will see the other childrennwating and this can help with being fussy. He eont go hungry with a good CM, she will know how to encourage him to eat.
Yes he may well get upset initially. But as a general rule, the CM can usually distract them enough to settle. I used to try and send a photo once they had just to reassure Mum. Please talk to your CM. She is there to settle you as much as baby.

Childcare providers are incredibly good at getting children to nap. What baby will pick up on is your emotional state so do try to be calm and show them that you are comfortable with the CM

OP, most children adapt and settle: as a species, it’s what we’re good at. They often settle and adapt more quickly if parents have already addressed some transitional changes to their routine and environment to be a bit used to what they’ll encounter in childcare.

"get a mini cctv camera in your home x no need to tell her just observe u will feel better then c"

This is just so very wrong on so many levels.

Please don't worry OP. Your CM will take good care of your baby and get him into some sort of routine. I imagine there will be a quiet room for naps and he'll like the social aspect of eating with others. There may well be a few days initially where he is unsettled but it is amazing how quickly children adapt to new surroundings and routines.

Eating and sleeping may take a while to settle, but don't worry. An experienced childminder will soon have your child happy and settled.

I’m a childminder. I don’t want your baby to cry any more than you do, so I do everything I can to settle them and try to get them to eat and sleep. This is easier for some children than others, but they do all get in to a bit of a routine, which may be different to what happens at home, but it all works out.
Tuesday will be hard, but Wednesday will be easier and the next day easier still. Hopefully your childminder will be able to reassure you after Tuesday that everything has been fine. I send photos and a a message through the first days, so parent scan see that their baby is happy and we are getting on well.

As a pp has said, it is normal for your baby to see you and then cry after being completely happy all day. They often don’t realise they are missing you until they see you again. You cm has done this many times and I’m sure has plenty of tricks up her sleeve to help your baby settle in with her.

Thank you so much everyone for your reassuring words. I don't think I'm giving my CM or my boy enough credit. I just need to get Tuesday over and done with!

Thanks again xx

The hidden camera post was bizarre to say the least....

blissa educate yourself on what the different forms of childcare are before giving ( very wrong) advice

He is getting on wonderfully. She gets him to nap far better than I can. He isn't drinking his formula but is eating lovely. He is in general a very happy chap there and he got all excited at the door today so I'm over the moon. Thank you for your help when I needed it x

Excellent news

Good to hear OP.

Fab all is going well

Does he sleep in the room with children playing

Surprised there isn’t a separate sleeping area /bedroom

My mindees sleep one end of my through loung non sleepers play the other end. Never had an issue even for children who wont sleep at home. We have a wind down story time then quiet play until sleepers go off...we play board games dominos do phonics games etc then have 1 to 1 cutting skills writing or whatever we are working on.