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Original poster

CM CLUB. advise re:special needs pleeeease!

10 replies

abitofadviceplease · 09/08/2007 20:50

(changed my name for this as would be very obvious to parent in question if a mnetter)

basically i have a new starter been with me a few weeks,(aged 4 1/2)its was quite obvious to me on day one that the child has some form of special needs,im thinking autism or asperges.im not an expert by any means but do recognise autism as have a bit of experience with it.
the child has attended a nursery for past 2-3 years and they obviously either havent picked up on this or just didnt say anything.
i need some help on how to approach the parents with this? i cant just come out and say "hey your child seems to be showing signs of autism!"
i have a friend whos a infant school teacher and recognised this straight away,as did one of the other parents (who wrks in ss special needs)
how do i handle this???
the child starts school in sept and im very confident the school will pick up on it almost immediatly.

OP posts:
Original poster
abitofadviceplease · 09/08/2007 20:58

come on where are you all????!!!

OP posts:
allthatglisters · 09/08/2007 21:15

I would be very careful. Rather than saying 'I think mindee may have ...' I would start by saying 'I've noticed they do such and such' (just picking out one thing perhaps) and see what response you get. It's also nice to comment on some positive things.

edker · 09/08/2007 21:38

Autism is serious if you are sure.
I joined Barnet link care sessions and they taught us about disability kids including autism.

If you have any doubt tells the parent you need the talk with her over a cup of coffee for example.

I think this is the best way.

Because if the child is autism you will have to work with parent and alone without their help I think you can't cope with many difficult situations which will be appear when you start to look after him.

Good luck

gringottsgoblin · 09/08/2007 21:42

my ds has AS. we had 3 awful years at school before we found out that was the problem. if you suggest it and you are wrong they might be annoyed, but it would be much worse if no one suggests it and he is just labelled as naughty as my ds was.

dont know what to suggest about telling them cos its never going to be easy. maybe ask if they have noticed him doing certain things at home as you have noticed them when he is with you and say they can be signs of ASD

Original poster
abitofadviceplease · 09/08/2007 22:35

gringott, how would have liked to have beeen approached re your ds if you were in this situation?

OP posts:
coppertop · 09/08/2007 22:50

Are you sure that the parents have no idea? Pre-diagnosis I didn't really tell people that I suspected ds1 had ASD. The problem is that people tried to be kind and reassure me that he was fine, and I felt a bit stupid about bringing it up again with anyone other than the people assessing him and other SN board posters. When he started pre-school I just told them that ds1 didn't talk as it was the only tangible thing I had IYSWIM. Is it possible that the parents already suspect but haven't said anything?

nannynick · 09/08/2007 23:23

Alas you are not qualified to make a diagnosis, so you must not say "I think your child is autistic".

Instead, I would note down events/behaviours which cause concern. Then talk to parents about those events/behaviours, asking them if they have noticed the same thing. How they handle that sort of thing.

Provide them with contact details for obtaining advice regarding say "behaviour issues", such as Health Visitor, local Children's Centre etc, so that the parents can then talk with a health professional regarding those behavioural issues and what may be causing them.

It's difficult to know what is best to do, as having a 'label' is not always beneficial at this young age. The child may be developmentally behind, and once in school may start to catch up with peer group.

cat64 · 09/08/2007 23:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

justoneweeboy · 09/08/2007 23:49

I have very close friends whose ds was picked up by a cm. The cm simply said to the mum "I feel as though my programme is not meeting the needs of your ds, there is a support group for cm called (special needs assessment team can't remember name of this) and with your permission I would like them to see what I am doing and give me some more ideas of how to work with your him." The assessment team diagnosed child and my friend has always felt the cm approached it all in a non threatening way and has continued on with her for several years as a carer.

Peachy · 09/08/2007 23:52

Hi

I also have 2 kids, one with HFA, one with probabl ASD but no firm diagnsosi.

For us the Cm has been a great help along the way, rather than saying @I think X', she's just confirmed questions, raised incidents where DS ahs responded differently to toehr children.

She ahs been a major part in getting DS this far and is a very important part of his life, i can't thank her enough for the care he receives.

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