Feeling guilty - any advice welcome

[gfg562]

Basically I look after our nephew sometimes 2 days a week depending on his dad's work patterns. I started when his mum went back to work after maternity leave as I was on my maternity leave, and they had expected both sets of parents to look after their little boy, but one set pulled out due to health reasons, which I totally understand. We get on well so I didn't want to see them stuck, and things set off not too bad, as my baby wasn't mobile. However I'm now really struggling with two very active toddlers. I know childcare is expensive and I feel really guilty about letting people down, but AIBU or sensible before one of our children has an accident? Whilst I was changing my son's nappy this morning, nephew had climbed onto the kitchen table and thrown everything off, and I'm scared he'll fall off it or hurt himself if he breaks something that I 'think' is out of reach. Nephew is great but I just can't manage them both at the same time. They are 12 months and 23 months. Will it get better soon or just worse? Any tips or help appreciated! x

I know childcare is expensive and I feel really guilty about letting people down

You aren't letting them down though. You helped them out for a while, whilst you could, saving them a lot of money for that time, but now it isn't working for you, so let them know.
If you'd wanted to be a Childminder, you could train and set up as one and get paid for it.
'Helping someone out' is usually for an emergency or is short term or / and is reciprocal. Providing free childcare long term is a totally different thing.

You're not letting them down. You have helped them out massively.