I am feeling uncomfortable

[Mimi666]

I am a 18 year old au pair and I arrived to my host family around 4 weeks ago. We did talk through emails and skype before I came, and they seemed to be really nice, but I am compeletly ignored ever since I arrived. They never asked me any questions, I am only talked to when it is about the kids. I told the mother quite a few times that her sun ia cursing and hits me and her 2 year old sister with different objects, her reaction was the following: I know, but it is getting bettef.
I am feeling really unhappy, I have troubles with sleeping and eating, when I see the kids, I start shaking and I cry almost every day. I know that this situation us also my fault, becouse the might not like my personality or becouse they thought my German would be better or I would be different, I don't know.
How could I bring this up to them?

Poor you. Can you go home? You are not eating or sleeping. If you were my child that is what I would advise.

I would leave....did you get the position through an agency? Sorry you're having a bad time.

Did you come through an agency? Could they help? I knew a girl who had a horrible placement years ago in Paris, we encouraged her to change it and she ended up with a lovely family and had a great experience.

Sorry to hear about this @mimi666. Four weeks is a long time to be feeling like that. Have you got a support network of any kind? Anyone who you can get in touch with to talk things through and who can help you speak to your host family if that is what's needed? It can be scary tackling something like this on your own.

A lot of au pair placements don’t work out.
I’d go home.

If you don’t want to go home yet ( and you have every right to walk away from this) then you need to tell the mum you would appreciate a chat when the children are in bed. Tell her you would like to learn some strategies to work with the little boy to help him stop hitting, and be honest about how you feel. She has a duty to see you are safe and trained to deal with difficult situations.

If she isn’t helpful at all - honestly, I’d just leave.

I had three au pair jobs as a teen - two were fine but the third - the middle one - was horrible. I left after 3 weeks and went into a great job where the mum was clear about what she wanted and organised which helped me realise it wasn’t me who had messed up the horrid job, it was them.

Listen, life is short. You're 18, soon this will be a distant memory. Go back home. Don't be miserable.

My mum always said to me that life is too short for misery, so where you can root put the misery. Be it a job, relationship or whatever. She was right about life being short, she died young, so I believe her now more than ever.

Have you told your mum?

They’re possibly very embarrassed about their children’s behaviour, but you don’t need to put up with a child attackig you, especially if the mother is not helping you with the situation.

You don’t write like a native English speaker, but if you’re non-EU take advice before going home, you may be able to get a re-placement with another family rather than going home and wasting the VISA.