Meals and 'treats'?

[PinkChick]

just took dd and mindee to cafe for lucnh.
Let them choose, so they picked a hot dog..fine..nice change as we would have normal had sanwhich or tortilla and i used to love hot dogs asa child...let them pick a N.A.S drink..great..then secretly i bought them each a smarty coverd dohnut(yes, overload today but its a one off)..neither knew this and dd ate her lunch quickly so i got her one out and said to mindee theres one for you if you eat all your hotdog..mindee(as kids do!) wants one now..i say no, only if you eat your lunch(she knows this, its always beent the same)
mindee then says shes full and doesnt want anymore hotdog and says she wants dohnut instead!

now i know i could have waited until mindee had finsihed her lunch BUT she eats very very slowly and we were on way to park, so didnt want them to miss out..but whats your normal etiquette?
i wont refuse anyone anything as long as they eat their meal or at least have a good go if i think theres a lot there, but i dont give treats/deserts if they have picked????

I wouldn't have given it to them either - stepson knows not to ask for treats in the day if he hasn't eaten all (or most) of the meal before.

my mom always used to tell me if you have enough room for pudding you have enough to finish your meal - mind you, she loves her puddings that much that she eats pudding before her dinner - when I asked her why she said if she has her pudding after dinner she might not eat it all and would rather waste a couple of potatoes than a slice of pavlova!!!

LOL, i just wanted to make sure i wasnt being mean for the sake of it

I don't serve pudding until everyone has finished

so how long do you give everyone to finsh a meal Katy?, my dd and this mindee would still normally be sat at table an hour and half at least if i didnt keep saying eat up, come one so we can play so on etc?

Use a timer - then when it dings dinner goes away & pudding comes out

so would they would atill get pudding if they hadnt touched their meal in that time?

Nope

Just fresh fruit (sliced apple/banana) or the fruit part of the pudding (timmed peaches/stewed apple)

Ice cream/Custard/cake = eating dinner

I leave the dinner on the table until the first child has finished their dinner - but I have no fussy eaters

That is so when they have eaten their fruit they can go back to the meal - if they eat it they do get the cake/custard/ice cream

but they do get a desert(i meant desert not pudding)?, mine are all slow and fussy eaters(dont eat v.healthy at home the majority of them) so if i do chicken breast tortilla theyd leave it and have fruit, i know its all good, but i want to encourage them to eat bits of it all.

Yes - but again I don't have fussy eaters

hmm, timer may work with them but would have to work out the rest..ta chick

It's not answering your OP but, to encourage one particularly fussy eater, we play a game where we try to decide if the food is crunchy or not. Cucumber is particularly good for this!! I make a big deal out of it if it's crunchy pretending that they made a huge crunch noise!! Fussy eater loves it and usually finishes his plate off!

I know that this particular mindee gets fed again at home so he's not that bothered whether he eats his tea at mine or not because he'll prob get biscuits when he gets home!!

If he doesn't eat his tea he only has fruit after, is offered his tea again but no yogs or anything. When he does eat really well we have a huge party to celebrate!! !!

We don't eat out often, however, we did go out last week and we agreed that as long as he had his cucumber and toms he could leave the sausage from his hot dog and have his ice-cream. I'm never quite sure whether he genuinely doesn't like something or not so I don't push it too much.

BTW smartie donuts sound yummy! Any left?!

i ate last two so worked hard at aerobics tonight!