dilemma - cleaner has been slating nanny to MIL - what to do?

[Tutter]

quick background:

• nanny/mothers help due to start f/t with us next week - she's come to us via an agency - our gut feel is that she's a lovely girl. strengths - she's bubbly, outgoing and flexible. she's only 20 with only a year's experience of nannying (3 yrs in nursery) but not a major issue as she's not going to be sole charge

• cleaner - a bit of a busybody - has been working for us for a few months. tendency to whinge and talk about other people in negative way

• 2 weeks ago new nanny spent day here and was sole charge while i was at hospital. cleaner also here

so... today i was at hospital again. MIL staying. cleaner here. cleaner same-ish age as MIL. makes it clear she doen't think much of nanny - says that 2 weeks ago ds wandered through kitchen into garden, cleaner found nanny lying on sofa reading a book (hers, not ds's). words apparently exchanged

now i have to decide what to do with this information. nanny's references very good. i called agency owner to chat through and get advice - goes against everything she knows to be true of nanny, and she warns about flare-ups between claeners and nannies (not uncommon, apparently)

my feeling atm is to leave things be, and just to get my own feel for nanny over coming weeks. plenty of time to observe, as ds2 not sue for 3 weeks

opinions? advice?

hmmm... if you dont want to ask the nanny outright could you possibly set up a little camera somewhere to see what she does when she is looking after DS - at least this way you will know for yourself what she is doing rather that hearing it from nosey cleaner.

would feel a bit odd doing that tbh soak

act of last resort i'd say

Have a feeling that you are not allowed by law to film people without their consent so might cause huge ructions if it came out.

Why not just have a general "chat" after a week or so? Ask her how she thinks it is going, how she is spending her days, does she find she has enough to keep her busy, how does she occupy herself when ds is asleep. I have to say that if you are paying someone cold hard cash to do a job, I don't think reading when there is stuff to be done is on, but if she finds that she has spare time, then you can either ask her to do more or she should be able to fill it in as she wishes.

think reading a book is odd, unless it is for 15 mins while she is sitting down with a cup of coffee when ds in bed

it just isn't the sort of thing you do at work. If ds is up and about, her job is to be with him not reading a book. If he is in bed, then there is usually stuff to be done, but fair enough to read a book while you have a sandwich and a break or something.

I would talk to her about it, and ask the cleaner for her version personally.

lol!! sorry - been watching too much 'britains worst...' !

I'm with PPH (Hello PPH!). There is nothing wrong with reading a book per se, but it's something I'd expect her to do as part of taking a break rather than 'multi-tasking' whilst looking after your child. I occasionally used to come downstairs from my home office and find a former nanny sitting by the french windows in a large old chair reading a novel and doing a passable imitation of a character out of a Joanna Trollope novel. But the kitchen would be immaculate, the children would be quietly napping and there would be freshly baked muffins on the table. Our current nanny sometimes reads whilst cuddling up to the children and cat and watching Cbeebies for the last half hour of the day. Fair enough - there is only so much 'In the Night Garden' a sane adult can take.