CM Club - Feel parent is pressuring me into doing what she wants!!! Am I being paranoid?

[star1976]

Mindee 2 has been coming to me for 3 days a week since March. Mum did say then that there may be a chance of her going full time in July, if I had the space, but hasn't mentioned it since.

I obviously need to fill the other two days for financial reasons, and have been trying desperately! Have finally got a possible for the two days, which would also involve picking up two older siblings from my daughters school (great financially).

However, mindee 2's mum said this morning that she may soon need me 4 days a week, so full time isn't going to happen.

When I said that I may have filled those two days and would be able to confirm for sure within a week or so, she said 'well if that is the case I may have to rethink my childcare'!!!!

If she gives notice cause I can't do the extra day I will be screwed! Not to mention extremely pissed off cause have turned people who have called for a full time space away cause said didn't have the space!!!

Don't know what to do !

Already in a right state financially and arguing with DP loads about it, can't afford to lose business, or turn more profitable business way .

Having missed the point, have to state that the parent knows that when her DD started with me, I was finally able to quit my horrid weekend job. And that I heavily rely on the income from her.

Asked parent to start paying me monthly in advance instead of weekly (as this is my normal policy but agreed to see how weekly would work) but said that she can't do that and if that is a problem I should give her notice.

Feel like cause she knows how much I need her business she is trying to manipulate me!

She also constantly states how wonderful her other childminder is and makes me feel like a second class child care provider and that she is only using me as other childminder won't have both her children at the same time!

Sorry, that really is too long isn't it!

Was it you who had the problem with the after school club and is this the same woman?

get advertising and then tell her to sling her hook!!! she sounds horrible!!

is there any chance that the after schoolies will be with you full time in hos for that bit of extra income til you get a proper full timer???

No that was me....I hate being blackmailed - it makes me stick my heels in and be extra stubborn

Could the 2 days a week plus siblings put you on until you manage to get another full times? If so - Take them on and politely tell this lady that it's 3 days or 0 days.

If she removes her child, then so be it. Don't let her make you feel like this. All you can do is be professional, but you don't have to be manipulated by her.

Take care,

Sally xx

Yes in holidays I would have the two schoolies all day for those two days. In fact they have already booked in for 4 days during last week of term and the first week of the summer holidays.

I have baby booked in for 3 days and older sisters for those 3 days and another 1 day (would be baby too but I can't cause of mindee 2).

And I know that there is a very high chance of days during the rest of the holidays too.

AND, it is my DD's best friend and her little sisters, so she is really excited about the prospect of it!

She sounds unreasonable to me - how can she expect you to turn people away on the basis that she might need you.

I think you politely say that when she confirms that she needs 4 days a week, you will assess your position at that point, but you cannot turn other people away on the basis that she might need you.

Alternately, tell her that if she really wants you to turn other people away so that she can keep her options open, she has to pay you for those two days. Not a childminder, but I would think that reasonable if she is asking you to turn away definite business.

Sorry - not well written! Must remember to preview!

Makes perfect sense to me! Thanks!

let her go, you will find someone who respects you, she obviously doesnt.

My opinion:

she is trying to manipulate you. advertise a space, when you have a replacement, give her notice. You don't owe her anything - she is not doing you a favour! You are a business and you have your living to earn. you cannot put someone elses needs/wants/convenience above your own. Don't feel guilty.

my childminder charges 50% retention fees if someone wants her to hold a place for them and not advertise it.

Thank you everyone, you have made me feel a little better.

Feeling so stressed with it all (and everything else that is going on at the moment) and desperately need to sort out my financial situation before me and DP end up killing each other!!!!!

Took details from an enquiry yesterday for a lady who wants her daughter looking after mon - fri 7 hours a day. Not to start till Nov but at least something to think about!

Advertise for someone to fill her slot. She is behaving very badly and you do not want to be lumbered with her. You need to show her the relationship works two ways - she is not doing you a favour by allowing you to look after her child