Would you go to work and put your kids in childcare (and what kind)

[DieAntword]

I’m thinking about getting a job. It would be full time. My kids would be aged 3 and 1 ½. They would be in nursery at least 11 hours (depending on commute) a day 3 days a week and maybe 9 hours the other two.

Nursery would be cheaper but I’m genuinely concerned about them spending so much time in a group setting so young.

The alternative of a nanny would cost more than the pay I’d get by a significant margin but honestly I’d not be going to work for the pay as much as honestly the ego gratification of feeling appreciated by a wider group than just my family and getting to feel like I’m working on important things and doing big projects.

What about a childminder?

My little girl has been in nursery from 8am- 5.30pm either 3 or 4 days a week since she turned one.
We had tears at drop off for a few weeks while she settled but now she has a blast and we always knew nursery was important to us, much more so than a childminder or nanny.
Personally it's very important to me for my daughter to see her mum working, and nursery offers so many more experiences and social learning opportunities than just me/my husband or a nanny/childminder ever could.

I couldn't afford to give up work completely when I had my DDs, so went back part time. I was fortunate that a friend owned a nursery, so they both went there. DD1 went 3 days per week from age 18 months until she started school. DD2 went from about 7 months until school, for 3 days initially and then 4 days later on. They both loved the setting, the friends, the experiences and it gave them a good start before they moved on to primary school.

If you don't want the larger nursery setting, maybe look for a good childminder in your area? It would be a much smaller group of children but they'd still get the gentle learning, socialising, activities etc. If you know what school they're likely to get in to, maybe look for a CM who serves that school, ie does wrap around care and school runs for children attending that school.

I’ve used all 3 over time.

They nanny was great, gave me more flexibility and the kids got to stay at home, okay with their own toys and have more 1:1 time with the nanny - but it’s very expensive

Childminder was similar but I took them from and too her house. Less children about and a more personal setting

Nursery, high turn over if staff, less personal but great for building relationships with other kids - the least expensive option

I think it's a HUGE change from Mummy full time to 51+ hours in childcare. Given this isn't about finances it's about you finding purpose, could you compromise and find something closer (sounds like commute could be quite long as you said 11 minimum) and given nursery won't be OK with you being massively late to collect? Or part time hours working up towards full time over the coming years?

Honestly I think it's a selfish decision to put them in childcare from 0 to 50+ hours because you want to

Childminder is more home from home if you we're happier with a nanny, but can't afford one. You might be able to find one who will also do drop off and pickup at your local school in a year or so for the older one.

JupiterDrops - interested to know what a nursery can provide that a childminder ever could?

Childminders are registered in the same way as nurseries by the same inspecting team (Ofsted inspectors will go into a nursery one day and a childminder the next) they work to the same standards (EYFS) many will have the same qualifications if not higher than nursery management, they offer all the same experiences including socialisation in large groups (via networking and attending groups and many are trained in speech and language support amongst other things, but they allow a child to follow their own interests and a lot more time to have individual support particularly important for young children.
They tend to be cheaper and can be more flexible, you can find ones who work with co minders or assistants and if you pick the right person will support your child right through school.

I'm having a similar dilema as I have to return to work. I'm considering using a combination of nursery and childminder initially to see where DD seems happier.