Mum and Step dad for childcare.

[LG123]

My mum and step dad have offered to have my little one when I go back to work. They haven't asked for any money but I would like to offer something, what would you offer. I'm considering 15% of what I would pay a childminder as I'm given 85% of that back.

But wasn't sure if that was a piss take or not..

How would you get 85% back? Its normally 70% max on tax credits.

Seriously?

@jannier Universal Credit pay 85% up to £646 for one child and as I'm only part time it will be less than that so I would get the 85% back. But yes you are right if I was on tax credits it is 70% but I'm on the new system.

@spinabifidamom Seriously what? Could you elaborate?

So if a childminder charges £3.50 to £5.50 an hour in most areas with a few going as high as £8 in seriously expensive areas, you would offer 53p to £1.20 with most areas being about 80p that's a bit if urine extraction I would ask them how you can contribute towards costs and what they would like not suggest a few pennies as that suggests they are not worth much. But remember that they are not paying insurance over heads craft and consumables or doing the hours of unpaid paperwork that registered childcare has to do ever week. Its also worth making sure they are happy to support your parenting style not one that conflicts as this does cause a lot of issues as children get older from refusing food, unacceptable behaviour and comment like I want to live with x just because x never says no.

@jannier Thank you :). I have asked and they have just said they don't want any money as they are happy to see the granddaughter morw but it makes me feel bad that they are looking after my child for free. As it stands she will only be 3 months old when it potentially starts so there is much in the way of parenting that I can see that could be different but both my mum and my stepdad and have been super supportive of my parenting and haven't done anything I've asked them not to. I just wanted to give them something such, was looking at £100/£150pm plus supply of nappies and food etc.

Sounds fair to me. My Mum has mine one day a week before and after school. I have offered money and she was absolutely horrified and didn't want any. I do occasionally buy her flowers or a treat but she wanted to do it.

Maybe supply all consumables and add a gift card for shopping if they wont take money or a weekend away now and then type treat. Its a much better way to suggest a sum than a percentage.

@jannier Good idea! I was never going to tell them it was 15%, more 15%ish in my head otherwise I'd be worse off than using childcare and can't afford to be.

@lg123 my mum also refused to accept money. I have treated her to coffee/afternoon tea at a naice cafe, paid for her and dad to go away for the weekend, meals out etc.

I think your proposal sounds fair and you cam always negotiate it if you feel its not enough etc

How many days are they having them? My in laws did one day a week until then went to school. It never occurred to us to pay them but we did take them out for a meal or have them to ours every 4/6 weeks.

I don't know about universal credit, but to claim tax credits for your childcare costs, your provider must be Ofsted registered as you have to provide the registration number and address. Is this not the same?

Good point

@Pinkprincess1978 2 days, taking them sounds like a good idea, thank you.

@ZoSanDesu - yes that's why I was going to propose the 15% as I wouldn't be able to claim any help and if I was to pay more than that I may aswell pay a childminder/nursery. Pretty sure that's fairly clear... sorry if it wasn't.

They might not take it as cash, it might take money for outings, a contribution towards food (when she's older). If not a nice treat for them every so often.

I don't know the rules but I think if they are receiving reward (cash or gifts) they have to be Ofsted registered. Might not apply to people related. I'd check that out though

@Lost5stone It doesn't apply to people who are related. Reading what Ofsted say, relatives do not need to be registered but using a friend if unpaid it has to be less than 2hrs, if you do pay them it's 3hrs. I checked it out a while ago when looking at childcare options. I just wanted to make some sort of gesture, feel a bit cheeky using them as childcare without giving something.. they have their own lives too.

You won't get any childcare paid by tax credits or universal credit withought a registered childminder or nursery so one of them would need to be a registered childminder. Well that's the rules in Scotland anyway.

Are you sure you can claim the UC help with costs if you are using familial car. I know when it was WTC I couldn’t look after DN, as despite having relevant quals I wasn’t a registered provider. I’m not sure about UC though

Sorry x post

@Thatstheendofmytether @Dazedandconfused1988 no I can't claim help that's why I proposed 15%, the difference between what UC pay and the total. I'm not bothered about financially better off, I'd just prefer someone I love and trust to take care if my baby when she's small.

Ah I see what you mean. No I think if they haven't asked for money them offering them 15% of what you would pay for a cm would probably be ok.

Right enough for a full time child I would take £175/week,if you were to only give 15%of that it only comes to just over £26 pounds so it won't be much, but they haven't asked for money anyway.

Just be grateful to nice parents and buy them a thoughtful gift occasionally and don't take the piss with late finishes etc!

@Thatstheendofmytether it would only be part time but I am thinking treating them every now again might be better.

@Desmondo2016 I'm thinking that now but definitely no late finishes. I took a part time job during pregnancy as I wanted to a little job that I don't finish late or take home with me lol.