When did you stop having au pairs?

[Cornwall73]

Our twins will be 5 this summer and we are currently looking for our third au pair (had au pairs every year since kids were 2yrs old).

Just curious about what age people stop having au pairs. Ours have been a real lifeline to us as all our family lives far away or abroad so the extra pair of hands has been amazing.

I don’t want it to end, but my kids share a room and if they want their own then to will have to stop having au pairs or move!!!

We are asking ourselves the same thing. When both are in secondary - possibly? But I don't really want them coming home alone. It depends also if we could find an older one who was happy with a housekeeper type role. I have seen the occasional profiles from girls saying they'd prefer that role but few and far between. I think some sort of pretend they like kids more than they do and it might not be impossible....

Also -Brexit?

I know, from next year I think we will struggle it is such a wonderful experience for everyone, they have improved their English and experienced living in another country. We have benefitted from someone helping us with the nursery drop off and pick up and learned so much about their home countries, met their families and consider them friends.

I'm also thinking when both are in secondary (kids are currently 6 and 9). DH seems to be envisioning longer, but he always had them growing up and had a much younger sister, so they probably had au pairs into his teens.

I just think it also might be hard to attract one as your kids get older as it seems to me, the older the kids, the more like being a housekeeping rather than a child carer it gets, because at, say 10+, kids might be less interested in having a friendship with the au pair and just be doing their own thing and won't need so much attention. And obviously, most au pairs don't want to feel like a housekeeper.

Re Brexit, I guess we're just going to have to pay £300 a pop or whatever for visas for APs from outside EU for the foreseeble as their position will at least be clear. Loads fewer EU au pairs available last we looked and I'm guessing it'll be even worse next time, which will either be this summer or end of the year.

10 is not an issue. They're still interested in the AP then. My older DD will be 14- have to see how that will go. It might actually be easier for them to hang out together tbh. I can imagine the two of them exploring London together.

We need so few hours at this point we'll have to compromise somewhere.

I was thinking that we wouldn't need an au pair when both DC are in secondary, but as it turns out the DC will be going to different secondary schools and will both need to be picked up and dropped off at the same time in different directions. DH is often abroad for two or three days a week so we will probably continue with an au pair for longer than planned.

Same thoughts I also don't want to end AP since they're teenagers and below... I don't want my children to come home alone from school. But I think, once they aren't teens anymore, they would be on their right minds and would have to take responsibility of themselves.

I'm expecting kids to make their own way back from school at secondary age, but I suppose at least DD will come home to DS and au pair for first two years and after that she'll be old enough to be be in charge.