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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

Trial half day with a Nanny - what to do?

29 replies

MummyMunchkin · 03/05/2007 11:36

I'm having a trial day with a Nanny next week. I've never employed a Nanny before so wondering what to do. Any advice would be appreciated. My son is 4 months old.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

fridayschild · 03/05/2007 12:58

Try to leave her to it! She has been a nanny before, I'd guess, so she's used to trial days. You want to see what she will do with your boy, and whether you can have a good working relationship with her. She'll need to ask you about what he likes doing, and whether your parenting style is baby-led or routine-led, but I would suggest being as hands-off as you can bear. It's a great chance to watch her starting to form a bond with him.

Eleusis · 03/05/2007 14:08

Get a nanny diary if you don't already have one. And ask her to fill it out from day 1, including what the baby eats, when he sleeps, if he was well that day, if he required any medication, etc. If you ask her to start a nanny diary later she may see it as an addition to her duties or possibly she will think it's punishment for something you are unhappy about.

NKF · 03/05/2007 14:09

I think they tend to hate keeping a diary. There may be exceptions but all the ones I've spoken to have hated it.

Eleusis · 03/05/2007 14:12

Perhaps, but then as an employee it isn't their choice. I hate writing weekly reports, but I have to do them anyway. And boy do I hate them.

juliewoolie · 03/05/2007 14:13

Dont do the nanny diary. I have had to do it in a couple of jobs and it makes the nanny feel like you are constantly checking up on her. If you start off with good open verbal communication then it shouldnt be needed. Good luck with the new nanny and remember you have employed her because you trust her to look after your most precious one.

NKF · 03/05/2007 14:15

I wouldn't do one. I'd try to get home early on some occasions and have a chat. It's a style of work thing. In offices we are used to writing reports. But nannies tend to be more practical and hands on and it irks them. Irks them unecessarily I'd say.

Eleusis · 03/05/2007 14:17

I completely disagree in the case of a 4 month old baby. When the weekend comes and he won't eat or drink anything, you will want to grab that book and thumb through week and see what he ate for the nanny. The nanny diary will become your bible if it is used properly.

Or when baby is sick, nanny leaves, babyis crabby and you think "oh shit, when was his last dose of calpol" You will want to find it in that book.

And, is sleep routines are inportant to you (as they are to me) you will want to be able to look them up.

Eleusis · 03/05/2007 14:19

Or several months down the road when nanny is off sick, suddenly you are calling into work for a day of holiday, and then you realise you can't remember wher they go on Tuesday morning. You grab the nanny diary, and there it is. Monkey music at 10:30, and off you go...

NKF · 03/05/2007 14:20

Perhaps more important if it's a week at a time. And of couse different styles of employer. I just thought it was worth pointing out that it can irk them. If it's important then go for it.

Eleusis · 03/05/2007 14:35

But, that's exactly my point, NKF. If she introduces it later it may irritate the nanny. But, if it's laid out from day one then it will just be part of the job.

NKF · 03/05/2007 14:37

By all means. Spell it out at the interview so the nanny can decide if it's the job for her. Not just in nannying work, there is too much hard selling of jobs. By both employer and employee.

NannyL · 03/05/2007 18:31

I agree DEFINITELY use a nanny diary!

I always write in it every day and i think the younger the child the even more importnat it is.

As for a half day show nanny round your kitchen...
where you keep things
how washing machine / dryer / dishwasher etc work.
where you keep hoover / dustpan and brush etc

give her keys to house and show how alarm works etc!

show her where to find important phone numbers

where the stop cock and fuse box is

where you keep bedding etc

how the babies nursary is in order... ie what you keep where

how to collapse and lie back the pram... and unswivel the wheels and all the other fiddly bits

tell nanny the basic routine that you use... when / how long baby sleeps for etc

maybe have a cup of tea, and a chat and then leave her to it for a while

good luck!

NannyL · 03/05/2007 18:32

also all the nannies i know write a nanny diary...

it seems to be the done thing down here!

Original poster

MummyMunchkin · 03/05/2007 20:49

Thanks this is all really useful - particularly the debate on the nanny diary. I hope to be able to use one as i already keep a record of when he sleeps etc an its really helpful to look back on if hes being particularly cranky.

OP posts:

Josie3 · 03/05/2007 20:56

I think that as this is a trial day you should use it so see how your lo responds to the nanny and vice versa. It's also really important that you like and get along with your nanny. All the practical stuff that NannyL suggested is spot-on, but I'd only be doing that if i was sure i would be employing that person. I'm assuming you would have a hand-over week or few days in which to do all of that. Just go about your day as usual - ask the nanny to play with/change/feed your son as you feel comfortable. This will give you a great idea of what she is like.

fridayschild · 04/05/2007 11:44

Our diary has

what they eat (so when I feed them at the w/e it isn't fish fingers 2 days in a row)
when DS2 sleeps and how long for
capol - who got it and when
playdates - the weekly classes aren't in

and I put in the times the shopping is arriving / plumber expected etc

Another thought - if this is your first nanny do you want her to be assertive and tell you how to do things? or vice versa? This is the sort of information that you should be looking for in the trial period.

Mumpbump · 04/05/2007 11:47

Ds goes to nursery so not quite the same, but they provide a written record. I agree it is very useful to know how well your child is eating, what their nappies are like and how much sleep they have had. The nursery also gives basic details about what they have been doing each day which if you can't be there is a valuable life-line to a parent, imo! I love reading about how ds has dressed up as a fireman, been out in the garden or even (yesterday) been to the local pet shop.

majorstress · 04/05/2007 11:52

About the OP, I got warning bells which turned out to be justified on one of mine from a little outing, I was actually trying to show her how to get the bus to the park-I would definitely get her to take baby out on a bus or whatever she is going to use so you can see how she copes.

My best nanny was delighted with my (late) introduction of a diary! She thought it was great! thanks eleusis

WanderingTrolley · 04/05/2007 11:53

As a nanny I never minded the diary - never took it as being checked up on.

NannyL's suggestion's are good for a nanny starting a job, but if I were your half day trial nanny I would wonder if you wanted me to change a nappy, spring clean or regrout the shower.

Leave her to it a bit, and have a good chat. See how well you and she might get on. If you feel you couldn't approach her with something difficult, or she's hopelessly indiscreet, or just not your cup of tea, you'll know to not employ her. OTOH you may find she's a great laugh and shows a lot of initiative.

Good luck.

NKF · 04/05/2007 12:07

All those things - playdates, calpol etc - I'd just tell the nanny and she'd give me an update.

ScottishThistle · 05/05/2007 06:52

I never hated keeping a diary for my Baby charges, it was as useful for me as it was for the Parents...Sometimes you forget what they ate yesterday or how well they slept!

ladywithbabies · 05/05/2007 16:03

I worked as a CM between DD and DS's arrival and I kept a daily journal for each of my charges, I found it as useful as the parents did and enjoyed using it. I also felt it gave me a real sense of achievement to look back on all the things we had done and the fun outings etc. It also served as a gentle reminder to me to look at the variety and nutritional content of the meals I was preparing over the week.

MissGT · 06/05/2007 20:57

The diary drives me crazy (i'm always forgetting to write in it until my boss is about two minutes away but i do think its a great thing to have - esp if she is running late or i'm in a hurry to take the other one home (i nanny share) it means i dont have to explain everything! and its great to look back at!

yellowpoo · 06/05/2007 21:17

I was a nanny and am now a mum. Never had a problem using a diary, it just let the mums I worked with know what was coming next... ( e.g. qty food eaten, day sleep and when) you verbally do not remember everything, nor can you explain in an end of day meet up. I loved my job and the families i worked for always agreed terms before i started. We met to discuss changes when necessary. As a mum, I can see the need for the diary even more clearly.

Genidef · 07/05/2007 10:31

Most of my friends (and we ourselves) started out with great intentions with such a book. I haven't met anyone personally where it's been carried on regularly past the first month. I can see why it would be useful, though, in principle - which is why we did it, especially with regard to medicine, etc. When I had a question about the day I had forgotten to ask, I just called the nanny to discuss, if nec, i.e re Calpol times.

RE the original question - I agree with leaving her to it as much as poss. Otherwise, she may spend most of hte time trying to work out what YOU want her to do and come across as not able to structure the day on her own etc which wouldn't leave you with a great impression or be very reflective of her skills.

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