Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Flip

Original poster

Having trouble with DD being babysat. HELP!!!!!!!!

7 replies

livysmum · 02/04/2007 01:32

Hello.
DD is 7 months old and I can't leave her side.
Today I left DD with Nana. I got in my cousins car to get a meal and nana and DD went for a drive to have a nap then back home, she was fine for 2.5 hours but then once she realzed i want tehre she started to scream. NAna couldnt figure out what it was so called me home, as soon as I picked her up she was cured.
I'm worried about the long run, what if DP and I want to go out for a day or have a weekend away (we've been in different countrys for 2 months, we need to re-kindle if you know what i mean). Is there some type of method I could do to get her used to someone else taking care of her? And i'm going to be back at work soon so god know what'll happen then. I just want to nip this in the butt b4 it gets reallllllly bad.
somewhat my fauly cuz I've been with her every day since birth and when she cries whoever is holding her gives her to mum to calm her down.
help someone!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

PenelopePitstops · 02/04/2007 04:17

just let her go with other people. she needs to get used to it now otherwise it will become worse when she is oldr. she will get over the tears eventully no matter how horrrid it sounds and she willget used to neig with other people if yur nana knows how to look after a child there should be no problems so if she is being cared for see will eventually be happy. you just need to bite the bulet and tell your nana to keep her.

Eleusis · 02/04/2007 08:10

You start by having more people around when you are there. For example have nana come over and give her lunchwhile you are there. Then go in the other room for a few minutes. Start with a variety of say two or three people who she can get used to then gradually widen the circle. She will learn that when you go away, you do come back.

When are you due to go back to work?

looneytune · 02/04/2007 08:24

Agree with others and just wanted to reassure you that this clingy phase is very normal around this age, even with children who are used to being left. One of my mindees started to get very clingy at toddler groups around this age (actually, I tell a lie, she was a bit older but still, it happens) and would SCREAM with arms out if I popped to the loo or did the coffee if my turn. It broke my heart, especially as she wasn't mine This phase DOES pass so hang in there

colditz · 02/04/2007 08:27

It's very normal at this age, she will jsut grow out of it

Original poster

livysmum · 02/04/2007 16:24

I sure hope she'll grow out of it. like she was fine for a bit then the scraming. nana thought it was wind so she had her over her knee rubbing her back and she was starting to lul herself to sleep then I walked in. So i guess nan just has to endure the headaches and DD will start to realize she is ok without me...

OP posts:

Cashncarry · 02/04/2007 16:44

I think about this time (7mths) is the time when separation anxiety kicks in so I think, in my limited experience, it's perfectly normal.

There are plenty of us first-timers who have the same "precious first born" syndrome as they call it on MN! DD is 2 and a bit years and I still feel that way sometimes

I would say maybe as well as getting Nana to help look after her, maybe use a creche or something with a more play-orientated environment so there are plenty of distractions when the "I miss my Mummy" feelings start to surface.

Don't worry - my DD was EXACTLY like this and in fact wasn't looked after by anyone other than me until she was 15 mths old and she went into full time nursery

ThePrisoner · 02/04/2007 21:51

One of my mindees was extremely upset at being left - she started at 5 months, and I had her for only an hour at a time, a couple of times a week, and slowly built it up to the whole days needed. Believe me, she was very very distressed (and the poor mum felt so guilty). I have minded her now for 20 months, and she is a sheer delight, and very very happy here (as is her mummy).

I suppose my advice would be to work on the "drip drip drip" theory. Try to make sure that you have her Nana around, whilst you are there. She will get used to her being there, just listening to you talking, having a coffee, and that Nana will sometimes give her toys or cuddle her. She will gradually realise that this person is fun to be with!

Is she going to be looking after your dd when you go back to work?

Flip