Could you please talk me through the process of finding an au pair?

[Aknowingsmile]

Have now joined Aupairworld and have a list of favourites but not really sure about the right steps to follow in order to find/secure an aupair... do I approach several of them at the same time? Do I include details like the pocket money I'm offering on my initial email and suggest a Skype chat or am I supposed to ask other questions first? If we chat on Skype and I like them, do we just agree on a start date and that's it? (I understand I would be sending them a detailed document with working hours, expectations etc; any documents I will need to ask them besides their passport?).

Thank you

Also, any pointers on rules/items to include on the document to send them would be much appreciated. Ie would it be unreasonable to ask of them to fly back to their country for the Christmas period for example, or that they vacate the living room after say 10.30pm in the evenings for some privacy or would that be really rude?

1. Yes, approach several at the same time...the more people you approach the better the chance you have of getting the ideal person for your family. However, the process can move quite quickly so it doesn't pay to be too slow either.

1. Your initial message should be re-itterating the important aspects that you require from your au pair.

My initial message is something along the lines of
Hi......., we really enjoyed reading your profile (insert something interesting about their profile). We're an experienced host family living just outside London. We're looking for a confident, experienced driver who loves children and can stay between xxx and xxx.
Looking forward to hearing from you.
(your name)

When they reply (if they don't fit the bill they rarely reply), at that point you can ask if they have any questions about you. After that message, I then ask if I can have their email address and I send them an info sheet.

I will happily send you my info sheet that I send out if you pm me, although I'm not back home until Friday this week.

You can then include pocket money, the fact that you would like them to vacate the living room after 10pm (I'd say 10pm rather than 10.30 and make it quite fluffy), I put stuff about not accepting people who even smoke occasionally. Also working hours.

The majority of European au pairs would want to return to their home country for Christmas anyway. However, if they are further afield i.e. Aussies, Canadians South Africans, it may to be too expensive, so you would be expected to host them.

After I've emailed the info sheet and if they reply and are happy with everything, I then arrange a Skype interview. I try and have a few within a couple of days so that I can compare.

Documents I ask for:
Passport
Police check
Driving licence (if they are driving)
Declaration of any health conditions they have.

Hope your search goes well.

Thank you so much Underneath for all the great info - it would be really helpful to have a copy of your info sheet if possible please, I'll PM you now. Thank you so much for your help

Thank you so much Underneath for all the great info - it would be really helpful to have a copy of your info sheet if possible please, I'll PM you now. Thank you so much for your help

Aknowingsmile, I have had Au Pairs/Mother's Helps for a few years now and I find that the ones who fare best are those who fall into the family, treat and are treated as part of the family.
Yes - they are an employee but they are also there to be part of the family and to learn the culture which includes family life.

With regards to the 10:30pm rule, you will find that most Au Pairs will have an evening life that will mean you do no see them most evenings. Leaving your home as their "home" makes them feel more welcome and it also ensures you get more from the person.

All the best with the search.

fialor that's not correct au pairs are not employees in the UK.
It is correct that they should be treated as part of the family, however, its important to get expectations straight before someone comes.

If the OP wants some space in the evening and then hires an au pairs who wants to be with her all evening, its not going to work.

Underneaththeash, you are right but mother's helps are, hence my employee comment.