Feeling so stressed and under pressure

[cm38]

I'll try and narrow it down!

Been a childminder for 14 years. Overall I love the job. I have got to the point where I'm totally stressed out and fed up of it but don't know what to do. I live on my own and need to work myself into the ground to pay for my outgoings (nothing extravagant just normal bills) and am feeling stress due to the family's I have. I'd like to add that work is sparse and if I could replace I would.

Family 1 I've had for 10 years..child ends soon and parents have fallen out due to a separation. Therefore they have terminated the contract earlier than I thought and are only paying for what they need. I kind of relied on their money so feeling a bit stuck

Family 2 has been back and forth to me like a yo yo. Lovely family but so disorganised and has just told me she's got a new job so needs to change days as her job has some childcare included. Not really that easy for me to accommodate. He's arrived today with her saying 'he's got a bottle because he's really poorly and I feel sorry for him??? I know if I send him home she will just scrap the 2 days she's asked for and I need the income but not happy.

Family 3 never pay on time. One of their children is extremely hard work.

The rest of the family's are term time only so I don't get paid in the holidays.

I work a 55hr week and am struggling..financially and emotionally. My car is bankrupting me but i can't seem to change it as failed the finance to be able to do so. I feel stuck in a rut.

My friends are amazing support as is my partner but my sister isn't. I just feel I have to do this job as there is no other alternative.

Rant over!

It's hard when work is sparse. The families may also know that they are in a position of power, because you need the money and can't replace them. My only advice is what to put in place for future families.

1. A fixed contract, so they pay for your availability, whether they use it or not.
2. Are you sure if you send a child home sick they won't book the days they need?
3. Late payers are billed £5/day as agreed on contracts.
4. Can you charge a retainer in the holidays for term time only children? Or if you charged a bit less, but all year, so maybe more over the whole year?
5. Run a holiday club, so you have term time only children and holiday only children (I charge a bit less for my holiday club, but they eat me out of house and home).
6. Can the children bring their own packed lunches, nappies, etc to save you some money?
7. Would a career change work (a change is as good as a rest)? Working in childcare (in a nursery, or pre school, a teachers assistant, or an Ofsted inspector, council Early Years dept). Maybe something completely different (supermarket, office, pub).

Do you ever meet up with other local childminders, so you can pass each other work and ideas?

All good ideas from HSMMaCM above. about two years ago I went through a blip where I really disliked my job, I'm back to loving it now, but the changes that have been made to help me like it are more luck than judgement. (I only do a four day week and 2 out of 3 families are absolutely brilliant, the third is manageable).
It I said hard when work is sparse and you feel you can't turn anyone away because you need the money. Do you generally enjoy the job or do you think it might be time for a change?

Not sure why you are allowing your clients to pay for what they need

And be behind with payments

The cms round me who have been minding for years (probably 10+) are all quite happy (or don't know how to change) to have children who only use the hours they need. Their reasons, they don't think it's fair that parents pay for something they don't use, childcare is too expensive, it's the way they've always done it. (We've suggested for new starters they put them on fixed contracts, but they think it's too complicated). The newer minders amongst us all have fixed contracts, parents pay for their days off and holidays etc. Some have late fee charges in place and we generally are all full, so parents generally don't see this as a problem.
I think for some, it's just the way they've always done it. At my initial training I was told to accept no messing around about money and contacts and I never have done, but I can see how easy it is to be to kind and be taken advantage of.

Thanks HS tbh I do most of what you e listed other than the fixed contract..may look into that. I am annoyed that the family who have decided they can't pay the bill are loaded and are basically saying they'll make alternative arrangements if I don't agree..I'd love to say yes but am struggling and I've had the kids 10 years..great relationship..cannot even begin to think going down the retrieval of money route..sigh

Mary I do love the job..most of the time stress free..hard work but fun..flexible etc..I think I've got too much else clouding it maybe that I need to sort. I've actually booked a long weekend off..was going to cancel due to money but tbh need it!

Blonde I've already explained why! The family behind are always behind..not good enough I know but I can't afford to just get rid of everyone..wish I could

Mary Ann I agree and that's all great and what I do but I think I struggle more where I live. I'm clawing at what i can get as too smaller town and too many childminders.

I don't think the length of time you've been doing the job determines how you do business. I know many newly registered who effectively let parent dictate terms and pay I also know many 25 year plus running child-minders who have sorted things out and run their business to contract.

In my role supporting cm's I find that those who allow parents to decide and live in fear are the ones who get mucked around and are left being owed lots of money and struggling to pay their own bills. I think because they don't seem bothered parents assume they are happy to go with the flow, SO business head on contracts straight addressing all problems you have had with existing families and advertise like mad for new families on your terms a stressed unhappy child-minder is not good for anyone so in the long term you will be doing everyone a favour.