Do you take your au-pair on holiday?

[Exmouth]

Just wondered

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She is part of the family so you should give her the choice - we do. Sometimes they came with us sometimes they stayed at home - whatever they wanted.

Our au-pairs have always wanted to come on holiday with us. I find it a strain tbh - I want to get away from them!

I won't be doing so for most of our holidays because they involve staying with rels or friends who don't have the room.

If we do a self catering hol I will give AP option of coming with us or staying at home or going away themselves.

I certainyl wouldn't want them on holiday with me all the time, holidays are for me and DH and DS to get a bit of quality fmaily time and although you try and make your AP welcome they aren't actually your family.

Have to say part of that is that with only one 2 yr old in tow I can't imagine our holidays would be alot of fun for a teenager! ie we aren't going to a city or a theme park. We spend most of our time on holiday taking it in turns to collapse!

Part of our problem is that we only just need an au-pair. I could manage most of the year without one, but not school hols. I am beginning to find that their presence somehow gets in the way of me interacting with ds a bit. I have only just begun to see that - at least, this is what happens in our family, I'm sure for some people they don't feel that.

We are different - the school hols are the only time we don't need an AP - they go to various sets of granparents, aunts and of course on holiday with us. Could you speak to your relatives and see if they'd have ds for a week - I'm sure they'd enjoy it?

Gosh I really am different aren't I? Every AP we have had has become a major part of our family and still is.

Hmm I think sorting him out for 20 weeks of the year would be hard on family! I should point out that the a-ps want to be part of our family and I have only ever had really good ones. I find even really good ones hard to put up with.

exmouth, waht do you find hard about it? askign because i like my space and privacy but we're thinking of an au pair

If you really need time away from the AP then I don't think it's unreasonable to go on holiday on your own & give her some time off!

Sunnyjim I find it hard because no privacy. My au-pairs have always done housework as asked, and more, baked cakes, cared for and about ds - but this morning, for example, got up naked, as you do, and stroked cat and au-pair was around and just felt a minor sense of lack of privacy/irritation. I think if you have maybe a very big house, or a really pressing need for an au-pair, then it's different.

Last night I got so fed up about the whole thing that I saw down and worked out that dh and I between us, have 10 weeks' hols a year and by only having an au-pair for July and August we can get by the rest of the year just by each taking two weeks' hols a year separately. So I get my privacy rest of year and we cut down on cost and holidays no longer a problem.

Best solution all round.

I can't go on hols without her - she's too young, too sweet, knows no-one around here yet. Just wouldn't be fair.