Nanny down time

[7654novice]

Hi. Our nanny works a couple of days for us. She is great in so many ways!!! So amazing with kids and generally pleasant and professional. We try not to micromanage her as we feel she's capable and we trust her with the kids.
One issue though - baby has started taking much longer naps in the morning time in the last couple of months and nanny does not seem willing to use any of this 1.5-2 hours to do Anthony round the house. To be fair, we did originally say that we want her to be a Childminder and not a housekeeper but baby slept less then and we didn't think she'd have much time to spare.
I have broached it with her, gently to start, but several tines more recently as direct but pleasant requests. She seems really put out and I feel hostility creeping in as a result.
To add, older 2 (school going) get a half hour TV in the afternoon and she also has a sit down then while baby has a second nap. We do not ask for any cooking and she doesn't feed kids apart from baby's lunch which is pre made by me. She works an 8 hour day.
Am I asking too much to expect her to use some of this 1.5-2 hours productively presuming she's had time for a decent break?

Ok, I see

Yes sitting down doing nothing for 2.5hrs in an 8hr day is smooth

But

As others said I'm not suprised she's pissed off with you asking her to dust and do windows. She is not a cleaner !!!!!

But

You can ask her to do nursery related stuff. Yes she can do some washing and we many separate kids /adults. Just buy another hamper to put kids clothes in

No one likes to wash their employers dirty blood stained - skid marked etc undies

Nanny doesn't like to cook 🙄🙄 tough. That's part of Nannys duties / she can batch cook or least prepare /chop veg etc for kids meals

Smooth? A lot lol

So 1/4 of her working days she is relaxing

Yes nannies deserve a break but takes 10m to sort and out washing on. Not like SHe has to scrub by hand

Not a nanny or a nanny employer but as a parent I bet this halcyon nap period doesn't last and in about 1-3 months, nap time will reduce and problem will be solved.

Pippitysqueakity - my 3.4 year old charge still naps for 2 hours after lunch! He has done since I started looking after him at 5 months old.

Jumpingcold - I'm not really sure what else you need to know! If I'm making macaroni cheese I freeze some plain, some with ham, some with chicken (I generally cook fresh veg for each meal) what ever is in the fridge. Same if I make a tomato based sauce, I add extra stock to make soup, meatballs to some, chicken, cod, salmon again, whatever is in the fridge.

Pippity, my 2 older ones both slept for 2 hours middle if the day til they were 3.
I'm just kicking my self that I wasn't more explicit about expectations at the start. I thought the 'role can be adjusted with agreement from both parties' bit would cover it. And soon after the nap almost doubled!

A nanny is a specialist childcare worker. Many of them are highly qualified, and good ones have chosen to devote their careers to looking after children. It looks like you need a general skivvy rather than a nanny - I can't believe you actually asked a nanny to clean windows!!! I doubt you'll have a problem with her much longer - she's probably looking for a new job. As others have said, nannies do duties relating to the children. If you want a cleaner, you'll have to hire one separately. You sound like you are just jealous of the fact that she has a longer break than you, and trying to be malicious by giving her horrible things to do like cleaning the windows. Totally unfair and unreasonable.

"it used to annoy the shit out of me when employers would ask me to empty the dishwasher. Your evening meal, you empty it."

Crikey. That wouldn't work in this house. We need everyone to muck in and we've always been very clear about that, there's no way on god's earth I'd be stressing about emptying a clean dishwasher of the kids' plastic plates in.

Think this thread shows that there's a MASSIVE range of expectations, which fits with our personal experience too, so the only way round it is to clearly put it in the Job Specification. No surprises.

When the Baby I look after is asleep I take a break. I I will do laundry/ironing and cooking. On a Friday I clean her toys. But that's it.

My understanding has always been that nannies will generally only do nursery duties: so personally I would never ask mine to iron or wash my clothes or do any general cleaning/dusting. She will unload the dishwasher if it's been run, or set it if it's full. She has actually offered to do some batch cooking for the whole family to eat including adults (especially when our new baby arrives) - but I think there is a big difference between offering as a favour and having it set as part of your explicit role.

It seems to me though that you could reasonably ask her to:

• Leave the sink and drainer empty if you do so in the morning (i.e. then she is only washing/putting away what she and the kids have used)
• Batch cook or do preparation for cooking children's meals including for evening meals (if you were at home you would probably do some prep for evening meals during the day - and presumably you sometimes have leftovers etc. from evenings and weekends that she can use for the kids?)
• Put away the kids clothes when they are out drying (even if they have been washed together: my DD doesn't get through enough to justify separating out the washes, but when I remember to hang it to dry separately my nanny will fold and put away).
• Leave toys tidy at the end of the day (other than whatever they are playing with/doing at that moment).

"But the 2 hour sit down she's getting is driving me nuts! I sat down for a sum total of 7 minutes yesterday, one of my days at home."

You seem to have accepted that the posters here are right about what tasks you can ask a nanny to do - which is fine

But there is something else. You have to disconnect from being "driven nuts" about her getting a sit down (if there is still time for one when she has done all the reasonable child-related things).

She isn't you. It's your house and your family. She's a paid employee.

If you were the receptionist for the CEO who owned the company, would you think it reasonable that he expected you to stay all night when he stayed all night? Just because he has to, so why don't you?

Respect her. Be nice. Draw up a reasonable list of additional things: child laundry, child food, etc, and suggest that she get to that when she has time. Say that you didn't expect her to have any time when the baby was up and down all the time, but you hope things have settled down a bit now, and she should probably have time to get to some of this. Don't check up on her. Trust her to be reasonable about a balance between working flat out and being strung out, and lounging about on her phone.

If it turns out she is actually a proper piss-taker, get a new nanny. If she doesn't work at the flat out pace of a mum in her own house at home with preschoolers, cut her some slack - it;s not her house.