Sorry if this offends anyone but...... 'plump' nannies?

[sunnyjim]

Is it just us or are nanny's generally 'plump'? (okay in this specific case I'm talking fat really, size 18+)

We have a new nanny, not started yet, but doing the odd half day alongside me to check that we all get along.

I just have concerns about her ability to deal with DS (active 22 month old) on a day to day basis. She finds it difficult to get up or down from the floor and I found I had to slow my pace massively when we went out to the park today.

I guess a part of me thinks that if she has a weight problem, does this reflect in her willpower/ self motivation in other areas?
Will she feed him decent food?
Will she take him to active sporty things (which he loves) or focus on sitting sitll crafty things (which he hates)

Don't forget to add:

'Must not take sugar in coffee' to the advert!!

I suspect you won't be telling her the real reason you're not taking her on will you?

FWIW I'm a size 24 DS is 15 moths old and full of energy as you would expect at that age, I have no trouble at all playing and keeping up with him and I'm probably as worn out as anyone by the end of the day. I also manage to feed DS a very balanced healthy diet.

I am unsure as to what universe you come from where having sugar in the house is such a huge issue and something that would concern you so much, please tell me what happens when a friend pops round for coffee with sugar?????? Do they have to go without. It actually sounds like you are the one with hang ups about food and nutrition.

Maybe if you had thought about it a little more you would have expressed your concerns about the poor ladies mobility in your OP without refering to her size.

Anyway I am off to call SS to take DS away as I am very overweight and DH is skinny so we must be the most unfit parents alive.

Was someone offering dust earlier, yum yum.

I have been a working with children for over 12 years now and I am over weight not proud being like this but its hard to lose it.
I have always worked hard in a 12 hour day 5 days a week.
Looked after children of all ages and they loved me. As I could give them big cuddles.
Also I took them swimming played sports with them was always playing with them.
Looks like you havn't done you homework properly on finding the right nanny.
Taken short cuts like most parents do.
I am disgusted and appalled of this thread.
I can not belive some of you are parents.
If the nanny is good at her job and the children are happy then you have no worries.

I can't believe this thread! I have been a nanny for 6 years and have always been a size 24-26 (currently bordering on size 26/28!) and my size certainly does not affect the way I care for my little ones!

I have as much energy as the next person does and used to walk for miles per day in my last job. Not because I had to but because I and the toddler liked to get out and he loved to be wheeled around in his pushchair. To not employ someone because of the size...isn't that discrimination???

sorry but just ROFL at justaposition of these threads!!!

....where do nannies start
...TELETUBBIES WANTED
see there is a niche market for us plump uns'

I was just saying to the ones who were against bigger nannies and I personaly think angencys are the way to go to get a nanny.
sorry but thats how I feel.

Sunnyjim

I respect you coming back to this thread and explaining your reasons behind it - as another person said, probably not well put initially but explained much better now.

I hope it hasn't scared you off of MN, weight is a touchy subject for a lot of us, and, tbh, initially this thread was lighthearted.

Anyway, I hope you find a nanny who you and your child are happy with.

"Sunnyjim, I'm sorry that you have had such a hard time," thank you

"I do agree with a lot of posters that your OP was written in a tactless way though."
Yes and I haev apologised for that and said that i was operating on lack of sleep, lots of worry and a concerned mum radar when i typed it - so I would really appreciate it if people could be grown up enough to accept my apology!

"I also think you are just trying to get advice and canvass opinion about something that you are not quite sure about, like most of us do on MN at one time or other."
Yes, maybe I wasn't as tactful as I could have been, once again I am sorry about that. I was hoenstly trying to find out if my concerns about her fitness levels were something anyone else could advise me on.

"So to try and help:
I would also be worried if a prospective Nanny didn't look physically fit enough to keep up with my three active boys."
thank you, finally someone else admits that wanting to have a carer who can keep up with and participate/inititate physical activities with your kids is a valid 'job spec'

"I agree with your stance of letting him do what he enjoys rather than pushing him into acivities that he doesn't at the age of 22 months.
Most nursery teachers will tell you, that you can't force a child into enjoying activities at the age of 3, let alone 22 months."
I completly agree, that is why I was concerned about her insistance on crafty activities which he doesn't like.

"I wouldn't be worried about their size per se, but more how fit they were"
So am I, as I've said several times now. My OP was badly written under trying circumstnaces. I have no desire for a slim/tall/fat/short/blonde/dark/ etc etc nanny. I just want them to be fit and healthy in addition to the usual list of caring, kind, practical etc.

btw: re sugar in the house - yes of course i have it! What I said was that we prefer not to have sugar or any other sweets out on the table for DS to see and ask for. I was a bit taken a back when after i'd got the sugar tin out for her tea (and put it up on the shelf with the coffee jars) she took it down and poured it out into a bowl without asking and left it out on the table near DS highchair.

Nanny912, I requested a CV and carried out an email interview, followed up references, did a CRB check, did a 2 hr interview, and I am in the process of doing 2 half days 'on the job' (with full pay) before signing a contract - exactly where have I taken short cuts?

sunnyjim, i bet you didn't anticipate this much fuss when typed your origional post !

i wonder why weight is such an emotive issue? i agree with the majority, that weight should not be a concern when employing a nanny (or anyone else) BUT i also agree with you that things like good energy levels and meal planning skills are important and valid issues for a nanny (of any size!)

i have no advice/help to offer really, except to say that if you don't feel that this nanny, or any other nanny, is right for you or your son then maybe you should trust your instincts?

hth

Ooh I really have tried not to join in but I can't resist...

I'm afraid that from your posts you do have an issue with the fact that she is fat, I suspect (like many women) you have issues about being over-weight which go beyond your concerns about her ability to keep up with your DS.

Sugar is not heroin and if you had a problem with her leaving it on the table, you ust needed to say "Henry will have that tipped on the floor/his mouth/the cat in 30 secs, so please could you make sure it's kept in a cupboard".

If you are uncomfortable with her weight you should not employ her, though if she is a really good Nanny (presumably you thought she was good enough to try) despite not being perfect, you may never find out that DS lost out on her good points.

I want to put things striaght I wasn't saying you were all cutting corners with finding a nanny I have seen on other websites that one Parent found a nanny then came home to find her gone and children left on their own.
She said she did all the right checks and everything.
Just frightens me.

I have gone for jobs from websites,
But felt i needed some advice from agencies about the job. And feel from a nanny's point of view my next job will be from an agencies.

Some nannies feel they may want support from agencies.
I regreat thaking my last job from an website as its not all what it seems I have been there 4 months and not happy. As I feel they rushed in to finding a nanny as mum is still post natal depression.

Wow, what a debate. So many different opinions.

I have been a nanny for 10 yrs now and have now gone into maternity night nursing, privatley which i love.

Anyway...... i dont see weight should be too much of an issue.
If you have vetted the nanny before employing her/him and you feel happy and confident leaving your child/ren with them that should be good enough to employ them because at the end of the day you need to have 100% trust in that person and a good rapor between the 2 of you for it to work.

weather she/he is a size 8 or a size 28 if you feel happy and comfortable and you can see your child/ren happy then go with your heart.

Oh how funny!

I could swear we had a trouble maker on Nannyjob ages ago who went by the name Sunny Jim!

I thought that too ST but thought maybe the name was slimjim on nannyjob.

You're right it was slim jim, not a coincidence surely!...Similar kind of post re weight, always chose something that would offend!

Good for you Sunnyjim - if you don't want a unfit, unhealthy person looking after you kids that's up to you. There are plenty of healthy, loving nannies out there.

Sunnyjim,

Do you think it may be that your intial concerns over your nanny's weight/fitness level may have affected your objectiveness on her overall suitability? What I mean is from the way you have gone on to explain yourself it seems to me like your nanny is just not right for you. Her level of fitness is only a part of her unsuitablility but her pouring out sugar into a bowl and leaving it on the table when you've just explained how you feel about that says to me that she might have issues with doing as she is asked because of her personality. (I'm sure other nannies read that and thought "she did what?")

Go with what your instincts tell you, nobody could/should judge you on that. I actually think if she was right for you, her weight probably wouldn't have been an issue, but your previous experience with nannies may have triggered a 'flag' which made it hard to see past objectively.

ROFL at this thread.

Madniss.

I agree with Jura. Nanny912 sounds as if she has a vested interest in promoting agencies.

You sound bitter, nanny912, about parents who chose to do the hiring themselves. What right do you have to take that tone?

Everyone here knows that nanny employers (and probably nannies too) get better advice here on mumsnet for free than the agencies offer. And an agency is out to make money, and they don't care about much else. Once they convince the parent to jack up the salary (so they can get a higher comission) and that comission is in their greedy little hands, well that is the end of the agency/parent relationship.

Okay, my view is synical. Some agencies do a good job. But, they are not the norm. So for you to insult parents who don't use them, saying we "cut corners" is well and truly out of line.

There... have I said enough, Jura?

And another thing, nanny912, be nice to Jura!

cynical

Sorry hijack

Nanny912:

"Taken short cuts like most parents do.
I am disgusted and appalled of this thread.
I can not belive some of you are parents."

F**K OFF!!!