Au pair not eating??

[LoisEighty]

Or at least, not feeding herself.

This is only day 5. First couple of days I made her lunch. I have asked her if there is anything she particularly likes eating, I have told her what we typically eat. I took her to the supermarket and asked if she wanted anything in particular - after much prompting she said grapes, which I bought but I don't think she's eaten.

When I did an online shop I asked if she wanted anything, she said no. However I bought crisps, biscuits, yoghurt, fruit, supernoodles, coke and squash, bread, ham, sliced cheese, pasta and cereal bars and have told her that they are in the kitchen.

I have cooked dinner every night and she eats with us, but I have yet to see her get herself anything. DH says she had some cereal yesterday morning.

What else can I do?

Nothing. Presumably she's an adult? You've done plenty already.

Are you worried she may have an eating disorder? Or is homesick? Or lazy/expects you to prepare food?

Does she look like she might not be eating generally?

She looks generally well fed!

I guess I am worried she doesn't feel comfortable or like our food, or maybe is completely clueless and doesn't know how to feed herself.

Is she completely new to the country? Maybe the food just seems very different to what she's used to and she doesn't really know what to even ask you for.

She's new to the country but has good English and is Northern European so although there are differences in style, pasta, bread, cheese, ham, fruit, yoghurt etc is all essentially the same.

All my au pairs have been similar in eating only meals and very little or no snacking

ive assumed that it's either a European or health thing - I think we snack an awful lot

If she is having cereal and a meal in the evening then she might just snack in the day. My adult DDs barely seem to eat anything during the day.

Having had several APs now the fall into one of two categories eating very little outside family meals or behaving like a swarm of locusts there is absolutely no in between. The last one would eat 2lbs of cheese, 32 slices of ham, 8 pints of milk, two large loaves of bread and regular family meals a week. I don't think I saw her eat a piece of fruit in 9 months.

I'm not worried about snacking - more that she has had breakfast once and lunch twice in 5 days...

I wouldn't worry too much. We've had 4 au pairs. They're often shy about getting their own food at first. But there's not much you can do, they're adults and you can't second guess what they like, you'll get it wrong. Fwiw I usually leave a supply of crisps and chocolate in their rooms so they can help themselves comfortably. Or give them money to go to the shop to buy their own food sometimes. Has she got time off / money to go into town and get herself lunch and coffee? It settles down over time as they get more comfortable.

Just have a chat with her

Reassure her that she can eat anything she wants from the house etc

If she's otherwise looking healthy and ok then maybe that's her eating pattern?

I wouldn't worry too much. We've had 4 au pairs. They're often shy about getting their own food at first. But there's not much you can do, they're adults and you can't second guess what they like, you'll get it wrong. Fwiw I usually leave a supply of crisps and chocolate in their rooms so they can help themselves comfortably. Or give them money to go to the shop to buy their own food sometimes. Has she got time off / money to go into town and get herself lunch and coffee? It settles down over time as they get more comfortable.