So do i just lie and say she fell in a puddle of mud?

[StrawberrySnowflakes]

one of my mindees whom i have spoke of on here before is still same as in cleanliness and hygeine despite me actually asking her mum umpteen times now to clean her nails etc...her clothes are washed as she mentioned mixing darks with lights at weekend and colours mixing, but coat, gloves, hat, scarf are always black.so..ive just chucked em in washer..am hoping duffle coat will dry by home time but what would be best to say? as shes going to notice the smell and colour of them??she fell in snow/mud?(which her dd will say no i didnt!), maybe she got food on them??

hmm

if the mum notices, then obviously clothes will be considerably cleaner. Which means they must be filthy in the first place.

Just don't mention it. If she asks, tell her that someone commented on how filthy the child's clothes are.

TBH I don't get this muck under the nails thing. I don't think I have ever cleaned under DD's nails but they are always clean. Must just wash out in the bath. Also maybe they aren't trimmed often enough which will encourage dirt more.

your very right and sometimes you have to be blunt, but would you be upset with me if i was your cm and i said that?..even tho they were filthy?

I wouldn't be upset with you, I would be ashamed of myself.

no, not just one off, but have put off doing them as didnt want to step on her toes.
and re nails, hers are often long and i(am told i shouldnt tho) cut them with dd's nail scissors.we dont do anything at moment (in this weather) to make her nails that dirty and even when i have scrubbed thme clean, she comes back next morning with dirt there again?..her mum also says she doesnt know where it comes from but im baffled?..its not everyday comes out in bath muck under nails, i have to get blunt end of scissors to scrape it out and still didnt get it all????

I would say don't mention it and if she brings it up, say "I was putting a wash on anyway and noticed it had got a bit grubby so popped it in.

do u think its a sign of neglect here>? Poor child I say-whats it going to be like for child when has to go to school like this

Still don't get the nails. Esp at this time of the year when they are not playing out as much. And if they are playing out they are running about, rather than messing about in the dirt etc. How old is she?

someone said that before?, but as im new to this i couldnt say!?
her mum is very loving most of time, but things like this too me are normal stuff you do?

shes 3 and gos from here straight home?

sorry that sounded odd, her mum IS very loveing>

Agree that other children are likely to pick up on this at school. But am also making a mental note to stick one of DD's coats in the machine tonight. In my defence, it is a lovely warm coat bought by a loving Auntie, but it is cream - on a 2yo.

well nail prob arises when we bake/make and other children notice it too

mindee 2 just got picked up and is normally ready to go but we were printing off nick jr printable on here, so he came in.he said.."ooh, smells lovely of clean washing in here"!

As colditz says, for the mum to notice, the coat must have been filthy, and therefore now very clean. I personally wouldn't mention it unless mother does.
Like you say though, things like nails, clean clothes etc are things most of us would pick up on, and whilst i can appreciate that mum is busy and may not notice ALL the time, surely she must see it some of the time?

not only does she notice, but i say it outright to her.."could you please clean under dd's finger nails tonight as we were baking today and noticed them when washing our hands"etc, even said "ooh, look at your nails!, dont know how she gets them like that as we dont play anywhere to get that dirty"!!...nothing..even mentioned to her dad and nothing..thing is, it is causing probs when other children say urgh look at your ails and may obv be carrying germs under them, explaining why they always have cold/bugs etc??

well my washing powder and softener do smell lovey and the coat..erm..didnt so i think its highly likely she will notice!

ok, so while im upsetting her about washing her dd's coat, i might as well broach the subject of dirty nails again..what can i say to make her clean them??

I think that is more tricky than washing her coat. Wouldn't be all that happy about it smelling of conditioner btw, as it is not something I use, although my MIL washes things sometimes and uses conditioner and I get over it. This is when the DCs stay overnight - so their clothes from the previous day.

Although I must admit when DS was PFB and I used to wash his new clothes before he wore them, MIL realised this, bought him clothes and washed them, and I washed them again in non-bio.

with it being a coat and not touching skin i thought it would be ok?..wash tabs are non bio.

Well its got to be better than dirt! I was just telling you about me, and I presume that my childminder isn't worrying about the state of DS's clothes (although he is regularly covered in mud after being in her care) so I am a different sort of person. I'm sure the mother won't worry. And I don't even use non-bio anymore....

Note to self - wash ds's coat tonight ... he's been rolling in mud all weekend and have sent him off to c/m in it - Strawberry, you don't live in surrey do you
I'd be DELIGHTED if my c/m washed & dried ds's coat for him esp if introduced in a 'doing a load anyway, wanted to fill the machine' way - but think I'd take exception to being told he wasn't clean (ie fingernails thing) - could you find a way to integrate this into your home routine - eg get a nice nail brush, encourage nail briushing before meals - excuse being more mud at this time of year???

are you allowed to clean the mindees nails yourself?! keep a nail brush and make such a fun game out of it maybe she will ask mummy if she can play the game at home!

i think this is shocking tbh. obviously you can't keep kids clean all the time (or for more than 5 secs really) but i feel sorry for this little girl.