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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

Ok fellow CMs. Stupid question i know, but.........................................,

19 replies

saltire · 19/01/2007 13:44

any advice would be appreciated.
Mindee 1 came this morning at 6am, 2 hours earlier than usual. He has been up since 5am. He is crying with tiredness, but will not sleep. We went for a walk this morning - i walked him as opposed to using the buggy, then had lunch, and he was rubbing his eyes. We took the other mindee to nursery, and he sat forward in the buggy, (as opposed to lying baack) so he wouldn't have to lie down, everytime i try and lie it back he cries. He sits forward as far forward as he can go, and falls asleep with his head hanging onto his chest, I tried him in the travel cot, he cried so much i thought he was going to be sick, i tried him in the bed, he got out. He really is so tired, and is currently on my knee, crying, rubbing his eyes, but will not sleep. I am going to take him out again in a minute, but he WILl NOT lie back in the buggy. On the occasions he does fall alseep in the buggy, if i try and put it in a lying back position he screams the place down.
The wee soul is really tired, you know when they start tripping over, and bumping into things because they are tired, and everything is a huge drama to them because of tiredness, well he is like that.
I feel so useless posting this but he really needs a sleep, and i just don't know what to do,
His mum won't be here until 6pm.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

shosha · 19/01/2007 13:49

Message withdrawn

blodwen · 19/01/2007 13:53

Let him sleep in the buggy with his head on his chest if necessary. It may not look comfortable to us, but if it means he will sleep, why not? Maybe you could lie him bach when he's fast asleep? If not, leave him sitting up. Plenty of toddlers sleep in upright buggies, and I'm sure the odd occasion doesn't hurt. Good luck.

WanderingTrolley · 19/01/2007 13:55

He's completely overtired,isn't he?

Agree with letting him fall asleep in what looks like an uncomfortable position then slowly lying pushchair back a bit.

Original poster

saltire · 19/01/2007 14:05

Thanks everyone, i do let him fall asleep in the sitting forward position, but as soon as i tried to put it back, he woke screaming. He is uusally here from 8 till 6. Normally he would have a wee snooze on the floor (on cushions) or in the buggy. He will not under any circumstances sleep upstairs in the cot/bed. He never has, he has always made such a fuss, although he will normally have a nap in the buggy. Odd days he won't, and is crying with tiredness by the time his mum gets here.
He is still on my lap, but if i try and move him into a lying in my arms type position he cries, he is still awake, but rubbing eyes, yawning etc
The reason i'm not sure about him sleeping upright is that he pulls himself, and the back rest, and the straps as far forward as he can go, so it's not actually where it's supposed to be, then if he moves slightly, it goes back into position and he wakes again, thus not getting a proper good sleep, which the wee soul is so obviously needing.

OP posts:

flatmouse · 19/01/2007 14:10

has he got any bruises on his back? Will he lie on his tummy?

Original poster

saltire · 19/01/2007 14:14

No he has no bruises, why do you ask? He won't lie on his tummy.
I am getting him into the buggy again in a minute, and will go for a walk and go and collect the DS from school.
His mum doesn't like it if he falls asleep after 3pm, as he then falls asleep in the car and won't waken for his dinner when she gets him home

OP posts:

dmo · 19/01/2007 14:22

6 till 6 is a really long day how do u cope?
i have had a baby here today 8.30 till 2pm and she has cryed all day (on her 2nd visit) i dont know if i could have put up with it till 6pm
hope he sleeps soon for you and is in a better mood when he wakes up

Original poster

saltire · 19/01/2007 14:29

I don't usually have him 6 till 6, today was a one off. I am paid for 8am till 6pm, she turns up between 8am and 8.45 and picks him up between 5 and 6, it depends on traffic.
The thing is, if he doesn't sleep at all, he will be very clingy, and i wll not get anything done, i have DSes and 2 other mindees this afternoon, if i try and do, say a craft activity with them, this little mindee will be hanging off my leg, crying wanting picked up, carried, etc. When i make the afternoon snack, he clings onto my leg and won't let go, if i move at all in the room, even though i am not actually leaving the room, he screams blue murder. I know he is tired, and i know i shouldn't say this, but his parents don't actually have any bedtime routine with him or his brother, they are allowed to run around the living room till they fall asleep and are then taken to bed. I know this because i used to mind his brother till he started a tnursery, and this what he used to do, so of course the little one does it now as well. I really think that is part of the reason why he gets so many colds ans snotty noses, he doesn't get enough sleep.

OP posts:

shosha · 19/01/2007 14:40

Message withdrawn

StrawberrySnowflakes · 19/01/2007 15:53

i was gong to say the same thing there Saltire..did he have any bruises or anything on back or tummy, simply meaning is it painful for him to lay flat.
dd would never be laid back in buggy and used to wake bolt upright if i moved it!..he is obv very tired and run down poor thing, if hes nods off at 3pm, id leave him, at least then he HAS had some sleep and thats so what he needs(and you could do with a 5min break i say!).
hope he feels beter

Original poster

saltire · 19/01/2007 16:14

Well, we have just got back, he's still not sleeping, still sitting on ym lap, crying if i try to put him down, or try to move.
Shosha, in response to your comments, i have another child usually from 11.30 till 5.30 every day (the child i have today i have 3 days a week). I have tried to get a nap routine worked out with him, but he cried and screamed so much when i put him into the cot, that it's just not worth it.
I had to take him to the GPs last week, to meet his mum, as he was ill, he had a virus and a chest infection, and got antibiotics, he has looked brighter this past week than he has done for a good few weeks.
The only problem now is that i won't can make any dinner for my two till this little one goes at 6, when he's like this i can do nothing, and it's not fair on other mindees TBH.
Sosha you are right about parents letting their child get this tired. I have tried really tactfully to get them to get help from HV, or sleep clinic, just to help them get some routine, but TBH they aren't the kind who listen to anything.

OP posts:

StrawberrySnowflakes · 19/01/2007 17:04

i think you should speak to his parents and explain that you cant care for the other mindees when hes like this, ask her to keep him off a day or two until he picks up..put it in the way that if it were another child, you would not be able to help her son and vice versa??good luck

mogs0 · 19/01/2007 17:17

One of mine was like this. Would never go near a cot at my place or at home. I used to drop my ds at nursery at 1pm then walk for 2 and a half hours with mindee in pram so that he'd have a decent sleep then go collect ds at 3.30.

About 6 months ago his night time sleeping had got so bad that his parents agreed to try out sleep training. For three days I tried him in the cot every lunchtime and he screamed for at least an hour and no sleep then on the 4th day he cried for 4 minutes then slept for and hour and a quarter!!

He now goes to the bedroom after lunch, gets his dummy from it's special place and asks to be lifted into the cot!! And will sleep for about 2 hours. He is so much happier. The first 6 months with him were so hard but now he is a dream to look after!

crace · 19/01/2007 17:22

I agree that you need to work with his parents to get a sleep routine going, sadly it make take a bit of time to get sorted but clearly he is missing a nap and needs one.

You just can't do your job with the rest of them properly like that can you?

Isyhan · 19/01/2007 18:58

Have you said anywhere how old he is? I cant see it if you have? All I can say on it is that when I was doing my nurse training on paediatrics I looked after a little boy who could not sleep in a normal position e.g. on his back because medically he had problems with his liver. He would sleep face down with his bottom in the air and if anyone tried to place him on his back it hurt him and he would scream. Im sure its not that as that was quite rare but it may be more than being overtired is what Im saying. I think you should discuss it with the mum and maybe suggest they speak to the Health Visitor if it doesnt resolve.

Original poster

saltire · 19/01/2007 18:58

This child's brother, who i minded from the age of 6 months is, i think the root of the sleeping problems. When he first came to me, he would only sleep if the buggy was moving, or if his car seat was moving. If i stopped, even to cross the road, or at a kerb he would waken and start screaming. Then once i started moving, he would settle again.
His mum spent the first 6 months of his life rocking his car seat - all day every day, and, well i don't know what they did at night.
Then as he got older she said "he gets so upset being in his room, he screams the place down so we just let him play till he falls asleep."
Of course little brother comes along, and as he got older he realises big bro is getting to run around the living room, so he wants to do it.
The little mindee has never really been one for sleeping long anyway. As i said he would never ever go in the cot, he would scream for scotland. He would occasionally sleep on the floor, if i put cushions down for a story, etc. But then he never got long as the others would waken him. He was horrendous tonight between 4 and 6. Luckily DH got home at 4.30 so he was able to feed the DSes.

OP posts:

StrawberrySnowflakes · 19/01/2007 19:22

as hard as it sounds(and i dont know if i could do it), it might be best to do things your way when hes with you ie:take him to cot/bed, put him onto it anyway he wants upside down if it works, sooth him, tell him your going to loo, folding the washing whatever and leave him(safely) thre for 5 mins and gradually increase..its sounds terrible but he really needs a routine and hes not getting one at home by the sounds of it

shosha · 19/01/2007 19:31

Message withdrawn

StrawberrySnowflakes · 19/01/2007 19:42

saying that you cant be running up and down stairs while you have other children to look after can you...hmm, dont know honey, its a tough one if parents are causing it

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