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Advise form childminders and mums please?

17 replies

attimesihatebeingaCM · 10/12/2006 15:32

I am a cm, have been for years and years. look after a family after school and one day last week my dh picked the kids up from school for me (my2 and minded2) this was a one off as I wasnt expecting to have mindees as the parent told me the day before they were being picked up by another parent, and would ring that evening if it was any different. They didnt ring but at 20 mins to pick up time rang to say I was to pick kids up as usual!) I had already arranged for my dh to pick our kids up so text him and asked him to pick mindees up to)

Parent has rung yesterday to complain that my DH had picked her kids up! She claims never to have met my DH(which isnt true, although she has only met briefly at pick up times) she also thinks nothing of leaving her kids at the local leisure centre unsupervised or other public places.

The kids are unruly, answer back and very bad mannered but of course never do wrong and never get told off at home.

Of course it is my "job" to pick the kids up but I feel a bit annoyed that they are even making an issue of this!

ok you wise peeps give me your thoughts please?

OP posts:
attimesihatebeingaCM · 10/12/2006 15:47

of course the title should be from not form!

OP posts:
dmo · 10/12/2006 15:50

well if she had kept you informed ...........
it will blow over
my dh sometimes takes the kids to school my parents are ok with it

S88AHG · 10/12/2006 15:52

I am with you on this one, 20 ,mins notice just isnt good enough really. To get round this kind of thing, I am also a CM, I have my husband registered as my assistant, so then nothing can be said by anyone if it happens again. I think she was a bit cheeky to be honest.

attimesihatebeingaCM · 10/12/2006 15:53

Thanks for the reply. None of my other families have ever had a problem with it in the 10 plus years I've been minding!

I was shocked tbh at her attitude! I dont think it warranted a rant over the phone to me and not letting me get a word in edgeways didnt make me feel any better!

OP posts:
attimesihatebeingaCM · 10/12/2006 15:57

Thanks S88AHG, we did think of having him registered years ago but it would mean he has to be around for inspections and courses and tbh that isnt always practical when he works and if I'm on a course he has our kids to look after.

It was a one off situation.

OP posts:
BuffysMum · 10/12/2006 16:24

Perhaps dh cold get CRB enhanced checked just in case. But TBH as a parent I think the parent was well out of order you were told that you would be informed the previous evening not 20 minutes before hand! Fair enough if she was paying you to have them even if they weren't with you you should be available to collect them but nothing in that situation warrants that kind of torrent about it. Can you even make it school in 20 minutes? I would struggle!

attimesihatebeingaCM · 10/12/2006 17:05

ah well they were paying me but I had discussed with then about being asked to help at a school fundraising event and they were fine with it because the kids were being picked up by another parent (joint custody thing). Had I had known that they werent going to be picked up by their other parent( as I had been told the day before.) I would have been prepared to leave the event and not help until they were picked up from me. I didnt think asking my DH to walk them home would be a problem. They were in his care no more than 20 mins before I came to collect them from him!

A previous week they were late picking up by half an hour. I tried repeatedly to ring them to find out if everything was ok but they dont remember to switch their mobile on yet that is the contact number they gave me.

My judgment has never been called into question before and I am a little miffed at the attitude especially as they (7&9yo) are frequently left in public places totally unattended when it suits the parent oh with the instruction dont leave the building, so thats ok then!

OP posts:
kt36 · 10/12/2006 17:17

i used to be a cm i did it for 4 years all the kiddies were great buy om my word the parents treated me so badly . i even got into a legal battle over payment it was hell. i now work in an elderly peoples care home and love it home is home now and work is work if that make sense

attimesihatebeingaCM · 10/12/2006 17:19

oh I understand that fully!

OP posts:
kt36 · 10/12/2006 17:25

i lost the money battle due to offsted being thier usual useless selfs it cost me almost 800 pound arghhhhhhhhh

ayla99 · 10/12/2006 19:35

Sorry, but its been made very clear to me that mindies are not allowed to be left in the care of our dh/dp's unless they are also registered or in the most extreme emergency such as the cm being carted off in an ambulance.

It was very thoughtless of this parent to give you so little notice, its a shame you didn't just tell her she left it too late.

StrawberrySnowflakes · 12/12/2006 13:41

i would assume you dh is already crb checked? as my dp is..and if she wants you to jump at 20 mins notice, when your dh is already at school with car collecting your two, she either is very grateful for your help at such ridiculous short notice, or or sorts her self out so she doesnt have to do this..sounds like she was trying to save a few quid using a friend, but it went wrong!

BabyFox · 12/12/2006 13:46

As a childminder myself I would not ask dh to pick up my minded children as to do this dh should be reg as an asistant.

When Ofsed did my inspection last year this was a topic that she bought up.

If I used a childminder myself I would be a bit miffed if their husband picked my children up as it not his paid job to do so. I do think the parents left it very late to let you know, but then (don't take offence) if a parent said she would phone I didn't I would have phoned them that evening to check.

Also Buffysmum dh should be CRB checked as this is part of the reg process

StrawberrySnowflakes · 13/12/2006 14:04

my dp had morning off today to go to dd's school play, mindee came and i said to mum, ooh we have car to get to school today so mindee and dd wont have to walk in this(pouring down and gale force wind), ill run in with dd and mindee can stay in warm car with dp(cant actually get parked for love nor money at school).
mum gives me a funny look when i said about dp, so i said well we can walk if youd rather (but that would mean 25 minutes each way in rain and wind or 2 minutes in the car with dp in front whom funnily enough isnt an axe murderer!) they see him every night as mindee is getting picked up late at minute.FGS idhave said thanks for keeping my dd out of the cold and rain

Tan1959 · 13/12/2006 16:29

attimesihatebeingaCM - Poor you for being in this situation. It was cheeky for this parent to ask you at such short notice; Ayla99 is absolutely right, if your dh is not registered as your assistant, mindees cannot be left in the care of that person.

I really do sympathise with your situation but these rules are also here to protect us and no matter how well the parents know our dh's or as in my case, my ds's (grown up), it is just not worth taking any kind of risk precisely because this sort of situation could arise

kslatts · 13/12/2006 17:00

Hi, I'm not a cm , but I am a working mum. I wouldn't have a problem with a cm's dh/dp collecting my dd's from school.

StrawberrySnowflakes · 13/12/2006 19:09

seems a funny subject this one doesnt it?

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