Full-time WOHMs who can't afford nannies....

[SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve]

What do you do about the school holidays/inset days/half-terms/sick days?

If you both work full-time, and you can't afford a nanny, what do you do? I'm hoping for a range of different answers, rather than a fight, please - I am interested to know what solutions people on lower incomes who can't afford nannies have found to enable them to work full-time.

we aren't there yet, dd is 7 months, but our general plan is..

i get 5 weeks annual leave, dh gets 6 weeks. each will take time off alone over school holidays, and just one week together in summer holidays.

we are lucky that SIL works school hours so can cover inset days etc.

other than that we'll use unpaid parental leave where needed ie if child is sick.

also, i will be working nights, dh days, so i will do school pick up, then dh comes home to take over, then i go to work.

Going to lurk on this one as have been wondering the very same thing.

DP is a teacher so the school holidays are mostly covered and I take holiday for the days where they may not coincide completely .

Inset days - work at home for part of it and arrange shared childcare with a friend (ie have both children for the am or pm) and catch up in the evening.

Sick days - sometimes work at home (can do this if it's my older child who is sick as he needs less attention - harder to do with the younger) or take as holiday or parental leave. DP and I share the sick days between us.

I also have a great friend who informally child minds - will take to school and pick up some days as I need her to and I pay her - so she takes up some of the slack.

DP is a teacher so the school holidays are mostly covered and I take holiday for the days where they may not coincide completely .

Inset days - work at home for part of it and arrange shared childcare with a friend (ie have both children for the am or pm) and catch up in the evening.

Sick days - sometimes work at home (can do this if it's my older child who is sick as he needs less attention - harder to do with the younger) or take as holiday or parental leave. DP and I share the sick days between us.

I also have a great friend who informally child minds - will take to school and pick up some days as I need her to and I pay her - so she takes up some of the slack.

i would also add that having debated this at length with colleagues, most seem to use grandmas for a lot of childcare.

God, I opened this wondering if it'd be a "why the hell not, you rich bitches" thread [hackles subside]

I'm luckier than Mad Jack McLucky with my childcare and fully appreciate it, so won't comment further - just hope that you find something, Greeny.

oooh and also quite a lot of people seem to use these sports camp things that local leisure centres run. that seems to take care of half terms and the odd week in the summer holidays. not sure what they cost though.

I'm thinking mainly of families in which both parents have to work to keep the household - I just don't know what they do about the times when they have to be at work and the children aren't at school. Particularly if you have no family or close friends - how do you do it?

a) Rely on holiday clubs which cover schools hols and some half-terms
b) get into informal childcare shares with other WOHM (5 mums/dads club together and each take a day off per week during the hols)). This works quite well for inset days in particular
c) Use a childminder
d) use family

But for illness take parental leave - there's isn't much alternative.

i don't work full time, but 4 days so almost do! DS at nursery at the moment so holidays not a problem yet. If sick one me or DH will take a day off work. I am lucky that my Mum does not work, but she lives 2.5 hours away so not easy for her to just "pop up" in an emergency. WQhen he starts school I imagine that we will look into before cand after school clubs or maybe use a childminder. In hols we will both take holiday from work seperately I guess and use grandparents for a few days here and there and perhaps holiday clubs? Think it is going to get harder rather than easier

the couples I know where both work full time use things like afterschool and holiday clubs, or a childminder.
Also at school age you can share with friends who are also working and want to swap children for a day. (though I scuppered that for us by having 3 close together, too many to palm off on anyone).

I can't afford a nanny and haven't the room for an au-pair.. I manage by having a fabbo Childminder, a great mum and a flexible work environment although dd only started school in September so haven't had too many problems yet. I'm very grateful to my mum and I think my childminder is a godsend.

Hi fennel

Are childminders much cheaper than nannies? All the parents I've known who have both worked in poorly-paid jobs, they've had family/grandparents to shoulder the childcare.

If you just have one child then a cm is much cheaper. But the main thing is that cms will tend to do school hols only which a nanny typically won't.And you can get WFTC too.

I was just about to post that if you use a ofsted registered carer/centre then you can claim CTC/WFTC.. it's definitely worth it in my experience.

I pay around £3.50 an hour for my cm and that includes dd's meals which sometimes is breakfast, lunch and dinner but mostly just lunch and dinner

Greeny there is more to cover than just the hols/inset days/sick days. There is also the before and after school care. Maybe you are thinking that there will be breakfast/after school club. But there isn't at ours.

Anyway I don't work full time. I work 3 days but if I did work full time I wouldn't be able to afford a nanny so would end up doing what I do now. I send DD to a day nursery. DS goes to a CM before and after school - there is no club.

I am lucky in that because I am part time (Tues-Thurs) inset days generally don't cause me a problem as they are usually Monday or Friday. If the children are sick either DH works from home or more usually I take a day's leave. My children are fairly healthy fortunately. If the CM is on holiday in term time(better for me because I only have a school age child with her) I do a combination of me working half a day, DH working from home before 9 and after 3.30. getting a friend to have them. I am lucky here in that because I am part time I can return favours. If the CM is on holiday in school hols (eg October half term she was) we sent DS to MILs for one day and night (but involved 2 hour return journey each for DH and me), my friend had him for a couple of hours, he went to hol club one day (10-3), I took half a day and DH took a day off.

Another thing that people do is space their children out to have a 2 1/2-3 year gap so that the first child is eligible for nursery grant by the time the second child starts.

School holidays - 6 weeks in summer, 2 weeks on holiday, one week DH, one week me, 2 weeks with sister & SIL
half terms - either me, DH take holiday or sister

inset days - grandma or take as holiday

sick days - I have taken as holiday or grandma has looked after her, but these are the worst parts as you cannot plan ahead.

It is bloody hard at times and I resent having to use annual leave for DD being ill. Also, parental leave has to be taken in weekly blocks, notified in advance and is unpaid. How useful is that?
So glad I will be on maternity leave for 12 months from April next year.

By leave for when the children are sick I mean annual leave not parental leave. Although at our work you get the option of buying an extra week's hols. I worked it out that with the tax/NI implications this meant I would be loosing about £20/month net so I took it. That way if I did need to take time off with the children I would not get a big hit in one month's pay.

Some of my friends have just moved their children to a different school solely because of the provision of before and after school and holiday care. It's been a priority for us in choosing schools too even though we rarely use it at the moment.

We worked out that a live in au pair would probably be the cheapest option, if you have a spare room and like having feckless young foreigners in your home (which we do). in the end we didn't do that as we both work flexibly anyway so don't struggle as much as some to fit work round childcare - getting a flexible job where you can start and finish at odd times and make up the hours is also worth considering if you have the choice. we save a fortune in childcare by both being able to work very flexibly.

some employers will let you take parental leave as odd days though, depends how flexible they are. but yes, the law says it has to be week long blocks.

I do think it is so much easier if you have family local that you can call on for ad-hoc/emergency childcare - eg inset days or if CM is on holiday, or school rings up for child to be collected.

I don't work full-time anymore - but still 30 hours a week. I am also lucky in that I work at home 2 days a week so that removes makes life a bit easier (not that working from home with 3 kids in the house is exactly easy!). I had an excellent CM who would look after all 3 in the hols but not too often as she wasn't really geared up for older kids and it cost me a fortune too. My parents step in to the breach but again, not too often as they are quite elderly now. DH is self-employed so can take time off when he wishes but can't afford to do too much. I've not found a satisfactory holiday club - most aren't all day, or too expensive, or no good so I don't tend to bother.

So in brief - mostly my leave, some of DH's leave, some CM and some gps. It's always a bit wing and a prayer really...

I definitely think that would be my preference fennel - luckily for me I don't have to work at the moment, although that may change in the future, but something with flexible hours etc would be more do-able. I just wondered what happens to people in lower-paid, less flexible jobs, who can't afford not to work but can't afford the most flexible childcare either - lots of schools still don't offer "wraparound care" etc. I don't know what we would do if our circumstances suddenly changed and I had to get the best job I could at short notice - it probably wouldn't be very flexible and I don't know the first thing about different kinds of childcare and what people do if they don't have family. It's a hypothetical enquiry really, it will all become irrelevant when I write my Best-Selling Novel

I work full time and am a single parent. Use a combo of

after school clubs
childminder
Grandparents
holiday playschemes
I buy an extra week's leave
and occasionally ask friends who don't work to help

Sounds complicated but with one child totally doable.

If I had 2 or 3 I think I'd be a lot more stressed!

I think you're right Greensleeves, if you both work full time in inflexible jobs and not particularly great salaries, then without relatives to help it's really hard. You'd need a really good after school club system or a good childminder.

but your DH works flexibly doesn't he?

my DP takes about 4 weeks unpaid parental leave a year. but obviously that only works if you don't need the full income. he's a bit work-shy so it suits him.