Spending lots of time in car with childminder

[jclm]

We have a great childminder. But I'm a bit worried that my daughter is spending too much time in the childminder's car, at dinnertime, when she should be eating and then playing before I pick her up.

The problem started last month, since the childminder has been dropping her other mindees off at home at 5pm, so dinner is rushed and play time is cut. My daughter is in the car from 4.30-5.30, then back to the childminder's house for a quick play, then I come to pick her up at 5.45-6pm, and drive another 30 mins back home.

Has anyone got any words of wisdom about this - or maybe people using childminders just have to fit in with the others, even if this routine is inconvenient.

How old is DD?

I wouldnt be at all happy with that (and my younger DD did a fair bit of car time at her CMs for school runs etc and it was OK). But does your CM get more income from the other mindees? If so she might not want to change the arrangement.

I guess it might also be tricky if you live rurally.

I might not mind it so much if it was the only car run of the day (eg no school or nursery runs in addition).

'people using childminders just have to fit in with the others, even if this routine is inconvenient.'

It's basically that^.

I wouldn't be happy with that amount of time spent in the car either, but you do have to fit in with the childminder's other plans/mindees.

You can talk to the childminder and see if there are any alternatives, but ultimately if you don't like the routine all you can do is move your DC to another childminder with a routine that is better suited to your needs.

This happened with my child at the childminders too.

On a Friday, she would be in the car from 3.30 until about 4pm dropping/collecting others, then back to the c;/m house for 20 mins then out again for 10 mins.

Sometimes I would walk to collect her and they would pass me in the car as c/m running late for a drop off!

Another time I used to turn up at 5pm to catch them on the drive waiting to drive off with my dd in the car...imagine if I had missed them! I would have been waiting on her drive for 20 minutes.

There were other issues, including her "dinner" consisting of a packet of Wotsits...

I'm not with her anymore, because my booking ended with nothing else lined up. I gave her the proper notice and payment.

I wouldn't be happy with your arrangement - is it just after school pick up or do you use her at the start of the day every day too?

Sounds rubbish and not fair on your dd.

Thinking of a family situation that is similar, say a family had 3 children and 2 of them did swimming lessons after school. The third child would have to go with them on the journey there and back plus watch the lesson.

Children at a childminders are part of a big family, so they fit in with what works for everyone.

Talk to your childminder about the journeys, offer a solution if you can think of one. Alas you may need to look for alternative care if these journeys are a deal breaker.

Is your daughter bothered by it? It's not ideal, but if she's ok with it and you're happy with the care otherwise, I'd probably let it go.

I don't think that dropping mindees home is a normal part of using a CM. I'd expect school runs to local schools and perhaps dropping to local activities, but not dropping them home 30mins away.

I'm a childminder and this is why I won't drop off or collect children other than the school run which is a 10 minute walk. Extra drop offs or collections just make things too rushed and I don't think its fair on the other children. I would have a chat with your childminder about it. Is it a long term arrangement or just for a temporary period? If she wasn't already doing these drop offs when you started with her you are entitled to query this change of arrangements.

Hm. Time in the car on school runs is sort of part of the deal with childminders. Hopefully this would be offset by lots of positives such as great activities, a lovely relationship with one carer and flexibility for you as a parent. You would also hope that time in the car is kept to a minimum if at all possible. I don't organise loads of after school activities miles away for my own kids for example. I pop one of them 5 minutes down the road once a week.

If you feel the positives don't outweigh the negatives of being in the car or that there are times when she is being taken out when it could or should be avoided then I guess you need to see if there are any alternatives out there?

Many CMs do school runs (I don't), but it is unusual to drop children home at the end of the day. It is not unheard of though and I know some CMs who offer this service. Parents have asked me if I will do it and the Local Authority has asked if I would take on children who needed this extra service. Did you know about it before you started there? Is your child happy? Are you happy?

It's not a complete no-no, it just depends if it works for you and your child.

If its a change you were not consulted over I would ask what the situation is and how long its going on for explaining why you are worried. I dont do collections and drop offs.

It depends what's happening in the car. Does she play music to them, real music, not just what's on the radio.

DO they do i-spy, play verbal games?

Is it her natural rest time?

Time in a car can be productive, if managed correctly, and if your child is very active at all other times it needn't be a huge issue.