Best place to find an aupair ?

[subina1]

Hi All ,
I will be a new mum in December and am looking for an au pair, not so much to help with the baby, but pretty much everything else, ie cleaning, odd food shopping, odd cooking, washing baby clothes etc
I think it should be a fairly easy role, as I wont expect them to look after the baby
I am really keen on finding a sweet, genuine , kind girl as I live in a flat and it will be important to have a good relationship and get on
Any ideas of the best sites to use ? can I use gum tree ?
Subina

Nowadays I find Au Pairs less keen on cleaning etc. than they were 6/7 years ago. My role used to be 4/5 hours cleaning and ironing and 20 hours childcare. To recruit anyone now I have had to reduce it to 3 hours total cleaning and ironing and 22 hours childcare ( well in truth less ).
I use au pair world, in general it is far trickier now than it was even two years ago to recruit a female au pair their are fewer off them, make sure pairs very, very easy. Two years ago I had 150 applicants in 36 hours and had employed someone in 4 days. Recently it took me till the very last day of the 8 week premium membership and I had to send my details to every candidate so hours surfing details.

I use aupairworld too. Au pairs generally don't like cleaning but I need them to so make it clear in my profile and messages that cleaning is included.

Lonecat, are you in London? It is still very easy for me to find aupairs and I have been using aupairworld for 8 years now. However, the nationalities have changed. Used to be a lot of Germans and Scandinavians. Now it is Spanish, Italians and lately French. Aupairworld is a barometer of rising and falling economic status.

I wonder, if you don't mind me asking, what's the going rate for an au pair in London? 9-5, 5 days a week

Au pairs should not be working 9-5, wtfih, get a nanny for that.

Hi Subina,
congratulations, I hope all is going well with your pregnancy. We have had a number of au pairs over the past 6years. I agree with lonecatwithkitten, I'm not sure that an au pair will be willing to come to your family. They really want to mind children more than anything else. Also when I was on maternity leave with my ds2 the au pair really only wanted to look after my older son. You could definitely put up a profile and see what response you get. If you are based in London you could get lucky as nearly all au pairs want to be in London. I use kangarooaupair and find it really easy to use and have had good success there so far. The au pairs are mainly from Spain and Italy. You could alternatively get a cleaner to come into the house for a few hours everyday?

I'm not in London, but still in South East. Last recruit last month they all seemed to want Manchester!

subina there are 100's of au pairs on au pair world. There will be plenty of candidates that work with your family and lots that would like a nice kind family and just a baby to look after.

You need to make it clear though that you need some time alone with your DH during the week, when you have a new baby, you're going to be exhausted and also need someone who's happy to cook a couple of times a week.
Look through the other host parent adverts on au pair world and decide what is important to you. the trick is it make expectations clear before she/he arrive, which can be very difficult when you haven't had a baby before, but you can iterate that that they need to be flexible, but you will keep language class times free.

wtfih - i think you do mean a live-in nanny and its from £300/week.

Thank you. Sorry, all new to me.

Thanks so much for your replies
With a new baby I think its very important to me that I will take responsibility for this, but someone around who can help with be amazing , especially as this is my first and I am very anxious and nervous.
Simple things like knowing I can ask her to pop to the shops to get a few bits if I am stuck, wash up, do the laundry, cleaning etc
I was thinking hrs of 8am to 2pm and perhaps 2 evenings, and then allow them to have the rest of their day free ? never done this before so as you say Karoleann I will need someone who is flexible in what their chores are. I suppose when you meet them you can explain all and get a feeling for whether they would be interested
For the right person I think this could be an ideal job
I imagine there will not always be chores for them to do, its more knowing someone is around when I do need their help
I am quite a soft easy going person, and as such personality will be important for me, I want some sweet, kind and genuine, very important with a newborn and also with my elderly parents probably being around a lot in the first month
With the agencies such as aupairworld and kangarooaupair do they do all the references etc or do I need to do this ?. My biggest concern is having someone honest , genuine plus all the other qualities
Sorry for all the questions
Thanks,
Subina

I have also found that there are far less candidates on au pair world than when I have previously recruited.

There are still lots, but a lot are completely unsuitable, or disappear after a couple of messages.

I'm wondering whether it is the wrong time of year.

As an au pair that used to be on au pair world, I'll tell you that a lot of the families on it these days either seem to want only a live in cleaner or an au pair with loads of experience, fluent English, Mandarin and Klingon, gourmet cooking skills and former work experience with Jamie Oliver, a masters in geoengineering, driving licence for a tractor and 35 hrs a week all for £90.

Au pair groups on facebook are a better choice in looking for au pairs, as there are many of them looking for families on there after au pair world turned into a dissapointment because of what was expected from them. I haven't been on since March I think, but when I was, even as someone with three fluent languages, excellent cooking skills and years of experience, I couldn't find a family because honestly the work load most of the family wanted was awful for very little money. A lot of au pairs (like me honestly) won't do more than 30 hours a week anymore. Awarness is being spread on au pair groups about how much work anyone should do, and almost every post I saw that asked for more than 35 hours would get at least 3 comments saying "this is a nanny position".

E.g. Regards the workload for little money, I got offered £100 for 60 hours a week, and then they told me when the child starts nursery I would get £60 as I will only be working 45 hours. Keep in mind this was a London zone 1 job position.

OP are you in London? I could easily help you find an au pair.

Anon, £100 for 60 hours per week aupair work is very low. 60 hours per week is nanny hours, not 35. 35 is higher than average but still pretty standard for an aupair job. I am not surprised you cannot find an aupair job.

There has to be a meeting of expectations on both sides. I have no problems finding aupairs who work 35 hours. Unfortunately, I deliberately avoid aupairs who are looking for an easy ride, which can mean aupairs who have done more than one stint and these aupairs might be found on facebook or gumtree. There are also aupairs on aupairworld who have previous aupair experience but guessing from some of their detailed questions that they are focusing on how easy or hard it is. My aupair role is pretty easy with lots of free time and older children who can pretty much take care of themselves (no school run). I want my aupairs to get a good experience in London but I would tend to stay away from someone who has too many expectations as well.

PS I don't need all the skills you listed just someone who is pleasant, willing to engage with my children, willing to do housework (which I am very clear about) and has good English because both my dh and I work full time.

Subina, I'd urge you to rethink getting an au pair for basic household stuff when you've got a new born. I think you might be far better off getting a mother's help/cleaner/postnatal doula type of position, someone to come in a few times a week but who lives out.

I had an au pair in the house when ds was born (so dd would get someone to play with her whilst my attention was on the new born). Bits of it worked out well, however there were times that having an au pair in the house felt like an extra burden - when ds woke at 3am and I'd desperately try to keep him quiet so as not to wake the au pair, or times she wanted to sit in the living room and chat whilst I just desperately wanted to chill with my baby, and I once silently wept when I went to make a cup of tea only to discover she'd used up all the milk a bit earlier...

Having a new born can be hard work, and if you can afford it definitely get a cleaner or mothers help, at least for the first few months but remember that an au pair can be in your house 24/7 and you have no idea how you'll feel about that once your baby is here.

I agree with above post - live out mothers help maybe better than an au pair when you have a new born and first baby . Consider how much privacy you will want after your baby is born as by having an au pair in the house you will lose this . When my children were babies I used to love visitors but then after a hour be wanting them ( politely ) to leave !! We have au pairs now but our children are at school . It can take up to 4 weeks for the au pair to settle in and you will find yourself supporting them more ( finding language school , transport , family routines etc) during this time . We recruit via childcare international - fees are high but worth it for us . I am rubbish with Aupair world but I know many other families who have found great au pairs . Good luck

I think a mother's help is more what you are looking for.

Au pair is more for taking kids to school and pre-school/nursery, and looking after them for a bit either side, plus some light housework like tidying.

I always use an agency to make sure they are vetted and that they are who they say you are., I don't have the time or resources to do this myself.

Or just a good cleaner might do it!

It's hard to find a good one. But you can look in internet there is a lot of helpful services.

Agreed - find a great cleaner ( try local parent FB groups - my local one has lots of cleaners advertising ) and start online supermarket shopping !!

The best way to find a cleaner is by personal recommendation. Ask your neighbours if they use a cleaner (particularly a neighbour who has a clean home) and whether they would recommend her.

As about cleaning. It's hard to maintain the clean house and care for kids. I think in such cases is better to use house clearance agencies . For example twice per month will be enough for you. + you will have more free time