Depression Diagnosis - Should I Employ a Nanny?

[MummyMoving]

I have recently been diagnosed with clinical depression. I've started medication and been told to rest. I'm a SAHM with 2 young children and have no family or friends in the area who can help out.

My husband is keen to hire a nanny to take pressure off, even though we can't really afford it. He wants to ask his parents to help us - but this feels totally alien and wrong to me. I already don't contribute financially and don't want to be a further drain.

Does anyone have thoughts or advice about this? Thanks in advance.

What about getting a mothers help, they can help out at home so you can spend time with the kids and on bad days take them out and about so you can sleep/have time to yourself

I think asking family for help would be more sensible than hiring a nanny in this situation as you say that you can't afford it, and you don't want further financial worries.

Could his family take them out for the occasional day? That way you get a break and they get quality time with their grandparents.

Get a cleaner not a nanny. And invest the balance in a fighting fund for taxis, good holidays with kids clubs and quality activities. Maybe a CM one morning a week.

The nanny might make you feel undermined and inadequate wrt your own DC.

I would get someone to do Cleaning at least once a week. If you do lots of ironing then I would look at contracting that out to a provider who collects and returns it to you.
Look at all those dull domestic chores, contract them out.
Playing with your children is the fun bit. Do not feel pressured to be doing a great deal with them, some days you will feel up to taking them out other days you will want to lay around at home and let them play. Train them to stay in close distance of you, not wondering around the entire house.

Look at spending 1:1 time with each child but having the other in part time childcare appropriate to their age. See what is available locally, such as a pre-school which runs morning/afternoon sessions for children aged 2.5-4.5yrs.

My friend who was a bit marginal with her PN mental health (to my eyes - obv I don't know her diagnosis) developed a routine where she went to the gym every morning, dropped her baby at the crèche - and took 2 hrs to herself to exercise/sauna/coffee/nails done/swim/whatever. It worked really well, because her little girl bonded with the crèche ladies really well - and it was much easier to set up than hiring a nanny / signing a contract with nursery etc. And it meant that my friend used the time to invest in herself, rather than be tempted to spend the time cleaning!