Can I ask a childminder/nursery re info sharing EYF

[Wonderingif1]

Hi,
DD is starting nursery and currently with child minder 2 days a week. Childminder has asked me to sign a letter to agree to nursery discussing any 'educational issues' with her and sharing diary etc. of progress to date.

I have NO issues with my childminder but I want any info re dd to go through me not through a third party and I want to say no!

Can I say no and if I do would that raise red flags? I have nothing to hide just would prefer all conversation to go through me ( I will be doing 3 out of 5 pickups) and it would then be for me to decide if childminder has information or not. Thanks.

I would be slightly if a parent didn't give me permission because it would feel like you don't trust me. It wouldn't be 'instead' of you knowing but as well as you.

Also I notice you don't say you want to decide what info the nursery has (permission is to exchange info both ways). Is it just the cm you want to deny permission to?

Thirdly it's a ofsted requirement and will make things difficult for the cm to justify not having the child's best interests at heart. It's all about the TAC (team around the child) and might raise red flags if you have other markers.

Thanks,

It's really not about trust, I have had no problems with my childminder at all and completely trust her. I may be just being precious I just don't like the idea of people discussing my child's development without me!

If childminder was collecting/pick up every day then of course it would be different as she would be point of contact for nursery and I would have no problem with her being the liaison, it just seems unnecessary as I will be at the nursery more often.

Sorry to address your second point, I think it's both ways really, not against my childminder! I want the nursery to treat/ assess child the same as if he had just parents care prior to starting.

You'll have to get used to it I'm afraid, this won't be the only time your child will be discussed without you being there. Nursery and/or cm might liase with school, teachers will discuss your child between them etc.

Maybe if you understood what will be discussed....
I chat about our planning, what can we do to compliment each other's settings.
Is little Johnny doing much mark making? - I don't have much evidence of it at my setting.
How is Sarah enjoying your garden? She prefers being indoors at my setting.

The we might share termly reports. It's useful to get a full picture of the child objectively. If you pick and choose what you want to tell the cm (presumably all the complimentary stuff!) then it's not a full and complete picture of your child's development and any help they might need. It's not in the best interests of your child.

They will treat and assess your child just the same! This is to benefit your child, not hinder him.

lol - no not just the complimentary stuff!! It's really not about hiding misdemeanors! I'm not really sure what my concerns are which is why I don't want to discuss it with my own CM in case I phrase it wrongly and it comes across as a trust issue and I offend her!

I just don't really want termly reports etc shared re my dd (sorry previous typo!) when presumably these things would be discussed with parents if there was no childminder. I just feel I know my dd better so would rather be the one to do this. I'm being precious aren't I..

What TeddyBear said.
It's so they can do the 'handover chat' at beginning and end of the 2 days when CM collects.
If there were issues / concerns, it's helpful to know if a child does the same in different settings, or just in the one - as that might make a difference to the way something is addressed, or if it even is something they need to be concerned about in the first place.
It really is the best practice, and best for the child, that everyone talks to each other.

A little precious but I understand.

I think if you trust both parties to work in the best interests of your child and you as a family you should give permission.

It's really no different to her key worker chatting to another staff member about your child.

Well ... To demonstrate how I worked with a couple of children's pre schools:

1. I emailed the pre school my assessment with a copy to parent. Pre school sent me their assessment in a file via the parent.

2. pre school and I had an informal chat on pick up and drop off, with the parent passing each of us any additional information.

Number 1 was better for showing Ofsted but number 2 was more efficient at sharing information for the child. Neither method hid anything from the parent.

I have a child who has a SALT teacher. Initially I found it hard that the SALT therapist wrote directly to nursery and me (as I wanted to control the information flow, because I didnt feel my nursery were doing enough and that my concerns were being reflected seriously enough in the SALT reports for the nursery to take action). However now 2 years later I think it is useful, and it does make it all about my child (& not me). Try and relax - everyone has your child's best interests at heart.

Thank you everyone, that's been really helpful. I'm still not 100% happy and I think Alanna may be right and it's a control thing! I do appreciate that everyone has my child's best interests at heart however and so I guess I have no choice - I don't want to make things difficult for either party!

I was just curious if anyone had ever said no to this and what would happen if they did. The last thing I want is it to cause bad feeling or ring alarm bells - I also don't want to be 'that parent'!! I just want to be 'in the loop'!

You will also know your child best and be number 1 carer. But if you're going to use childcare providers home you need to accept that they need to know your child almost as well as you do.

Believe me I wish I didn't have to jump through these hoops either! I'd love to just care and love and play with my mindees and not faff about with all the rules and regs that OFSTED insist on, but that's the rules!

Then not home

Sorry to hijack this slightly, but I just don't get this. Ofsted say this is a 'must' so nurseries/Childminders have to share information with each other about children. But a parent can over rule this descion. Who has the higher right and has anyone ever had to face ofsted about a parent who had refused permission and what was the outcome?

Well in theory a parent can refuse permission but TAC means that agencies (so everyone in contact with the child) must exchange information/report to safeguarding team of the child is at risk. This is usually with parents knowledge and consent but doesn't have to be.

If ofsted visit and inspect then in theory they would be graded down but it depends on the individual inspector of course.

I had a parent who refused and had to demonstrate how I tried to give information to the parent to pass on to the nursery. It is much better if everyone shares and everyone has an input. Most importantly the parent. The CM could say the child can't climb stairs, the nursery could say the check can climb stairs and the parent brings it together by saying the child can only climb stairs if holding their favourite monkey, or counting, or whatever. It is worth it and it does work.

So to summarise because I'm waffling... The permission to exchange information is more of a 'we need to do this is it ok?' and is by no means forbidden if a parent declines permission.

Just decline. Safeguarding information is different and obv doesnt require permission.

There was a thread recently about a CM wanting to attend parents evening did to this ofsted recommendation. I reckon ofsted get a bit big for their boots sometimes, this is like the ruling about friend swapping childcare that ofsted staying imposing and then government had to turn round and say was nuts.

If you decline, please give both settings a letter to say you will pass information between them, or they will both be downgraded by Ofsted.