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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

Expecting money from au pair

18 replies

janetwim · 18/03/2015 21:14

Someone who I know from our coffee morning recently shared that their au pair won a pretty large sum of money. I personally know the said ap and she's a lovely girl, very nice and kind.

That said, that same person who told us that (her host mother), told us how she's expecting the au pair to give them some money (I'm talking over £30000) because they were such great host parents to her and they think they deserve it. I was very disgusted and so were the other present laides at our coffee morning, and certainly don't get why they would expect to get such a large sum of money from someone who does not owe them anything!! Also they said that she still works for them while searching for a house to buy and they stopped paying her. Reson being : why should we keep giving her money when she's richer than all of us. The fact that they believe they're entitled to a bit of the money simply because she lived with them when she bought the winning ticket baffles me.

Why would you expect this from your au pair? Do you think it's reasonable? Would you seriously expect your au pair to give you this huge amount of money even though you did nothing to deserve it? I don't know, I am so.. Speechless and angry for this. Just wanted to share this to see the opinions of other mumsnetters as DH stopped listening to me ranting about how horrible that is hours ago

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TheAuthoress · 18/03/2015 21:18

If it was my own early 20's child I wouldn't even expect them to share their winnings with me! And it's ridiculous they aren't paying her!

Heckler · 18/03/2015 21:21

She's Deluded. Completely unreasonable.

karmagetsyou · 18/03/2015 21:22

It's slave labour FFS!!!

trixymalixy · 18/03/2015 21:23

WTF!! Totally totally unreasonable.

Toooldtobearsed · 18/03/2015 21:24

Good grief, this is the second thread today about badly treated au pairs!

Obviously a difficult job to be in.

QueQuesto · 18/03/2015 21:25

If I was the au pair I'd be telling the cowbag to fuck off and checking into a hotel.

SurlyCue · 18/03/2015 21:26

I would be calling the AP and telling her to leave that house asap! How dare they do that! Shes a mug if she stays.

HSMMaCM · 19/03/2015 03:27

They think they are wonderful, when they're not even paying her !!!

I wouldn't effn expect a family member to share winnings with me.

NaughtyRed82 · 19/03/2015 03:45

They've got no right to any money and deluded to think they have, esp a figure that big and they've stopped paying her just because she's came into money WTF, surely they can get done for that, employers withholding wages. If anything the AP should see what prats they are if they're that low that they're not paying her now and get out of there as soon as possible and take all her money with her. Can you get hold of her via phone or a letter addressed or passed on to her and tell her that she shouldn't be working for free,bushes entitled to be paid for her work and it's not right and that she's telling people that she goes to get her hands on very large amounts of her money and that she should just leave and rent somewhere for now??? Help see what situation she's in and that she should leave, maybe she's too scared too and if knows someone else sees it too it might be the push she needs.

ArcheryAnnie · 19/03/2015 03:49

I think QueQuesto has it right!

Good grief - if you see the au pair at playgroup or in the park, do congratulate her and remind her that the money is hers, and that she owes her host family none of it.

And the host family not paying her because she's richer? I'm pretty sure Starbucks has more money than me, but I still have to pay to buy a coffee there. Ridiculous.

FeijoaSundae · 19/03/2015 04:00

I hope the au pair has some support here, and won't be swindled into giving these, frankly, thieving people any money.

There is absolutely zero reason why they should get a penny of it, and if she's as lovely as you say she is, she might be convinced to be parted from some of it. She is working for them, and she deserves to continue to be paid.

The only people who have even a tenuous claim to any of it are her actual parents, and that would only be is she wanted to give them some.

And I say this as a host parent, myself.

musicalendorphins2 · 19/03/2015 04:29

YANBU! I hope the AP gives notice and checks into a hotel or B&B.

Nolim · 19/03/2015 05:33

This is unbelievable.

bunnyhipsdontlie · 19/03/2015 07:41

Tell the Au pair to leave!! Why does she stay if she isn't paid? She seems too nice, I hope she doesn't give them money!

ThingummyJigg · 21/03/2015 18:19

why is the au pair still there if she's not being paid?

why hasn't she flooded the bathroom and fed the children sugar lumps and flushed her keys down the loo and painted SO LONG, FUCKAZ on her bedroom walls, like any normal person would?

did she win £30k (wtf can you buy a house for that, I am in London where that is the price of a weekly shop) or is that some random figure this unbelievable host woman is expecting?

Original poster

janetwim · 21/03/2015 19:17

@thing we're in London aswell
That's just the figure the woman is expecting, the ap has won WAAAY MORE than that. I've seen the ap at the park yesterday and went to chat with her a bit - she says that she'd feel guilty if she'd left straight away and left them without any childcare so she's mostly staying only a few more days until the new girl arrives. Also told her how they're expecting money and she just laughed and said she'd rather flush the money down the toilet

OP posts:

nbee84 · 21/03/2015 19:33

Good for her! She's obviously a lovely girl as she didn't want to leave them in the lurch.

harshbuttrue1980 · 21/03/2015 22:10

Totally unreasonable!! I wonder if these awful host parents would have given the au pair anything if THEY won or inherited any money?? If you haven't earned it, then it's not yours. If any of my friends won money, I wouldn't expect anything, let alone a colleague or employee. Some of my friends have more money than me, some have less, but the worst off friend doesn't expect money from the better off ones!

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