Nanny or au pair?

[annepande]

I'm looking to get some help around the house and I really can't figure out what the right solution is. My son is in nursery 3 days a week and I need a back-up help at home, since my husband travels a lot. I'm uncertain about an au pair, as I would like someone who could also do heavy cleaning, cooking etc. At the same time, I like the flexibility of an au pair, as I need someone for those unexpected situations, say I feel ill or need to be somewhere. Plus, we would also like to be able to go out once in a while on the weekends. Does anyone have experiences to share - au pairs/nanny-housekeepers/others - part-time/full-time???
Thanks.

The right nanny with the right remuneration could well offer the flexibility you need. I think you are looking for more than an ordinary aupair arrangement should reasonably cover.

An au pair or nanny won't do heavy cleaning. Especially a nanny, you do realise a nanny is a childcare professional not a cleaner?

I would get a cleaner x2 mornings a week

Then au pair to cover odd afternoons/ some weekends etc. 20 hrs a week will appeal to most. You can say for example that's one evening mon-thurs, plus 3 hrs mon-fri daily. Or decide one Saturday a month plus 3 days 4 hrs etc. whatever suits best

Our au pair cleans the kitchen once a week (full clean inc floors), but she wouldn't be expected to do bathrooms, but is very flexible with regards to babysitting. We have a cleaner too.

They usually do 25 hrs a week + babysitting twice a week.

They live with you and share meals etc, although most don't eat every night with their host families. Having an au pair and a nanny is very different (we've had both), you're much more involved in an au pair's life, but a nanny is very much an employee.

It really depends on how old your child is. Au pairs are usually for wrap around care (before and after school) and not suitable for under 2s. When the child is at school au pair can attend a language class. If you need her/him to look after the child during the day when he/she is not at nursery you really need a nanny (somebody trained and experienced).
From my own experience I found au pairs really hard work as they are usually young, inexperienced and require a lot of hand holding and often took some time to adjust to our culture. I have no time for that now.
If you want somebody who could hit the ground running go for an experienced nanny/housekeeper. Nannies do do housework but be upfront and realistic about it (do not expect much while she/he is looking after your child). Nanny could easily do the housework and cook in advance while your child is at nursery.

If you want heavy cleaning then you need a cleaner.

The rest of it could be covered by a nanny-housekeeper, but you're unlikely to get the flexibility unless you're going to pay them full time hours. You could be lucky and get an older person who doesn't have any other work and could be more flexible, but it's quite a specific requirement.

An au pair would offer the flexibility and be much cheaper, but you can't really expect much in the way of housekeeping/cooking etc. Plus you have the hassle of someone living with you, needing to recruit every year etc. Au pairs really suit some people, other people really struggle. It depends very much on your personality.

I don't see why you could not get a nanny/cleaner as long as you did not expect them to fulfill both duties at the same time. If he/she worked for you full time they could clean while your DS is at nursery and look after him when he is at home. You could negotiate weekend babysitting on a case by case basis as an extra.

How much can you pay? The price differential between a nanny and an au pair is huge. Especially as you have to pay nanny tax etc (au pairs come in below the tax threshold). We switched from a nanny who cleaned to an au pair and a separate cleaner and saved approx £16k a year.

I think this could be suitable for an au pair, providing your child is old enough. Generally over 3 is seen as a good age.

Au pairs will do some cleaning, but maybe get a cleaner once a week to do the heavy work.

boo coz nannies are not cleaners

I didn't spend two years hard studying at college when doing my NNEB to then scrub someone toilet

OP wants heavy duty cleaning which neither nanny nor au pair will do. She needs a cleaner

And maybe a few nannies numbers who can come and babysit /work odd Saturday as and when OP needs someone - onv booked up in advance

Not fair for an ap to look after a 3yr - they are normally for children at school 5+

Good news for me then Blonde as my nanny/groom/cleaner must be imaginary and I don't need to pay her then! You may well feel that some jobs are beneath you, but that is your personal preference.

I think the point is that heavy cleaning is not part of a nanny's job.

That doesn't mean that you can't employ the same person to do both jobs. You can employ someone to be both a nanny and a cleaner, but they are two separate roles.

A cleaner doesn't typically provide childcare. A nanny doesn't typically do heavy cleaning. Some people will/can/want to do both jobs.

In the same way a nanny and a groom are two completely separate jobs, usually done by two different people. If you have someone who is good at both jobs and wants to do both then of course they can!

It's not within a nanny's job to fix your boiler. If your nanny is also a plumber, then by all means employ her to do both nannying and plumbing, but it would be odd if someone asked you for a plumber recommendation and you suggested they contact a nanny agency.

Blondes - au pairs regularly look after over twos. I've never heard anyone say 5+. Most agencies say 2+. Our au pair dotes on our youngest and I've reduced his nursery time do they can spend some time together.

Outraged I really don't get your point. I am not suggesting the OP hire a nanny and then two weeks into the job announce she wants her to do the cleaning or plumbing as well. Grooming and nannying are also two separate skills but there are employees who have both skills and employers who want both skills - in fact there agencies like Nags and Nannies that specialise in such posts. I would not expect my nanny to shovel shit but I would expect my nanny/groom to do so and I don't find this to be in any way degrading.

Yes some jobs are beneath me. In this case the op Stated she wanted heavy cleaning and cooking

The average qualified /professional nanny doesn't want to clean. They want to look after children

OP also wants ad hoc childcare - to me these are different positions

Yes you may find the one person willing to do all 3 - and they may be good at it - but usually cleaners don't make nannies and vice versia

And boo if you have found a nanny who is happy to clean nanny and look after horses then great

You could be my old employer :) I was their sole charge nanny looking after 3 children for over 5yrs.

Now all at school and eldest 12 - roles change and they have a lovely lady who looks after the children - cleans house - walks dogs and sorts out horses - she is a Saint and does everything - but not many nannies would do it all

OP - I suggest a cleaner/hk who will clean and Cook and maybe look around for as hoc temp nannies for as and when you need someone

'Grooming and nannying are also two separate skills but there are employees who have both skills and employers who want both skills'

This is what you said Booboo^ and below is what I said;

'In the same way a nanny and a groom are two completely separate jobs, usually done by two different people. If you have someone who is good at both jobs and wants to do both then of course they can!'

Isn't that exactly the same point? I don't understand why you don't understand my point when your point appears to be exactly the same?!

And I never mentioned the word degrading at all, ever. My mum worked as a cleaner for many years. There is nothing degrading about earning an honest living and paying your bills.

Sorry outraged I got completely confused between your posts and those of blonde!

I never said degrading either - boo did - I just agreed with her that is was 'beneath' me as I am employed as a nanny

I said that cleaning isn't what nannies want to do or what they trained to do

I have 2 friends who run their own cleaning Business and they are flourishing :) just one can't find enough staff to help her as seems people don't want to earn a honest living cleaning

My point was that I don't want to clean as I'm employed as a nanny BUT if for whatever reason I Couldn't find nanny work I would then look Around for a job to pay my Bills and if needed to clean I would - but not as a nanny iyswim

If something is beneath you then it would be degrading to do it, that's how language works.

In any case what is the point of all this? The OP is free to advertise for a nanny/cleaner and if she finds someone good for everyone, if she doesn't she can re think. Clearly you do not want the job so don't apply for it.