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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

G/parents charging to childmind?

17 replies

Babashka · 10/01/2015 10:23

I wonder if any g/parents charge their family for taking care of children while parents work?

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tryingtocatchthewind · 10/01/2015 10:23

Mind don't but I always offer money for activities and petrol

Optimist1 · 10/01/2015 10:26

Yes, because it's been a 5-days a week arrangement over several years. Totally businesslike. Has worked very well, and of course doesn't include ad hoc babysitting or sleepovers.

heronsfly · 10/01/2015 10:30

I look after my dgs three times a week while his parents are working, I don't actually charge them, but they do give me enough to cover his lunch and any trips or activities we may do .

Jinxxx · 10/01/2015 10:58

I know of grandparents who charge for childcare, which is perfectly reasonable in my opinion especially if they are giving up work or the opportunity to work in order to support their own children's careers.

SnowWhiteAteTheApple · 10/01/2015 11:00

I'd like to think that family members giving up their time on a very regular basis are always offered money by the parents but sadly its not the case and they are simply taken for granted.

It's a lot to ask of a person who may have hobbies, freedom etc they don't really want to give up just so their fault child can avoid childcare costs and save the money.

Jinxxx · 10/01/2015 11:03

...that said I also know several families where there have been rows over different issues concerning childcare and where children have ended up in paid childcare after grandparents' care has not worked out. I guess that is more likely to happen where grandparents are paid as the families can obviously afford to pay for care and make other arrangements.

HelpMeGetOutOfHere · 10/01/2015 11:05

My mum used to charge when she had my dc and did the school run etc. she doesn't charge her god daughter now though!!!!!!

HSMMaCM · 10/01/2015 12:08

I think it's fair for grandparents to be paid. I also think it's ok for them to waive payment. In the latter case, all expenses should be paid (at least).

Marylou62 · 10/01/2015 12:37

My DM has never charged my DB for her 2 long days of childcare...but is retired with a good pension...talking with my DD who hopes to have a baby within the next few years (YIPPEEEEE!!!) and has always said that she wants me to childmind...but I would have to give up work (or could be a nanny with Grandchild....NWOGC!!??) I would need to be paid something....so it completely depends on the financial situation of the Grandparents...

batgirl1984 · 10/01/2015 12:51

I am aware some grandparents drop their hours at work to care for grandchildren. I think of it as quite a risky arrangement as if parents then choose to use a different form of childcare it could lead to family tension. Also impact on pensions!
I wouldn't be averse to paying grandparents if they were in a position to offer regular care, I would have trouble getting my own parents to take money from me (they won't take expenses for babysitting).
In summary - parents should offer. Grandparents are at liberty to refuse or accept as they see fit.

wheresthelight · 10/01/2015 21:11

My friend doesn't pay her inlaws for looking after her dd full time.

my mum has offered to give up work but we would have to match her current wages.

tbh I wouldn't expect them to do it for free however we are looking at a childminder as my relationship with my mum is iffy at best

fluffymouse · 10/01/2015 23:52

It is very different if it is one day a week or full time. For full time care I understand payment would be appropriate, but a day a week to save parents money on nursery (and gp can still work) is different.

I have never paid for care from grandparents, however it was very unreliable, and I now prefer to use paid childcare.

Allingoodfaith · 10/01/2015 23:58

My DGM never took a penny for dd1 even though it was offered - her and dgf loved having dd1 there. However dd2 (18 years later) MIL expects spare ribs and chicken curry and rice with a bottle of wine just to baby sit while dd2 was fast asleep. we don't ask her any more.

Jinxxx · 11/01/2015 08:10

A whole bottle! I wonder if MIL would be awake herself in an emergency.

FlossieTreadlight · 11/01/2015 08:11

We covered petrol and the cost of activities

BlackandGold · 11/01/2015 10:07

If you gave up a full time job to do childcare then presumably that would mean you didn't pay NI and that would then have a knock on effect of a lower state pension.

If, however, you're beyond state pension age it wouldn't be a problem.

Mind you, full time child care would exhaust me!

Babashka · 11/01/2015 15:39

Two of my friends childcare their g/children and charge - we don't and its never been brought up, tbh we are happy to be helping them out financially as childcare costs are not cheap. However, were we to be offered some petrol money or a day out occasionally we wouldn't say no!

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