Au pair holidays at Christmas

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I am wondering how much holiday those who have/have had au pairs allow them to take at Christmas? Our latest one wants 3 weeks but will only have worked for us for 12 or 13 weeks by then. In the contract we give 4 weeks paid holiday per year plus bank holidays (so pretty standard I think) so that would be a substantial amount of her year's holiday allowance. We have been flexible with previous au pairs though although that tends to be after they have worked for us for longer. I am wondering what response to give, especially as she told me a couple of days after arriving that she would probably be leaving by March (she had previously agreed to stay until July at least)! It would be helpful to know what is the normal amount of time off for au pairs at Christmas. Thanks!

If she's staying less time, then you should be giving her less paid holiday anyway.

Our current au pair is staying 6 months and therefore we are giving two weeks paid holiday (she's taking her 2 weeks over Christmas and new year). We pay when they return from their holidays rather than before - just in case they decide not to return!

I would offer just to pay for 2 weeks and the other can be unpaid.

Karoleann, thank you for the advice. Yes, I had realised she would be going over her holiday allowance. I think its a practical solution to pay a maximum of two weeks. She will only have accumulated 1 week's holiday by the time she goes away so it seems more than reasonable. The other issue at the back of my mind though is that she may ask for more holiday between Christmas and March so I think I would have to stress to her that she will only be allowed to take any remaining paid holiday she has left and no further unpaid holiday. Does that seem reasonable? For me the inconvenience of having to cover all the extra holiday is more significant than paying for the holiday so I don't want her to think she can take as much time as she wants unpaid (unless this is what everyone else does for their au pair - in which case I may need to rethink my childcare!).

If she's only staying until March you could ask her not to take any further holidays and give her the holiday pay owed when she leaves.

Thanks Countess, this is pretty much what I have said and also that most of the holiday she is taking at Christmas will be unpaid as she won't have accumulated enough holiday. In fact, I had forgotten when I originally posted that she had already asked for 4 days holiday in November plus she is taking a further 4 days off in October which we aren't counting as holiday as we have agreed she can make up time for us during half term hols instead. Now she has also asked for a long weekend this coming weekend (not counting it as holiday but wants to just do extra work on the other days to make up. In fact she more than asked - she told me she wouldn't be available. It is beginning to feel like her expectations on time off don't really match with ours so I am not sure how things will work out after the Christmas break. She is a good au pair overall but it does feel like she is pushing the boundaries more than previous au pairs have done.

Wow that's pretty much four days off every month between now and xmas- that's alot!!

I would absolutely say no to three weeks, and say she can have 5 paid days.

Taking the piss comes to mind...

We always agree for our September - July au pairs:

2 weeks paid at Christmas

2 weeks paid at Easter

plus bank hols.

Any other time off needs to be in school holidays only and is by agreement(i.e. October/Feb/May half terms if I am off work or have other childcare) but will be unpaid. I have no extra leave to take to cover any additional time off, so other requests e.g. in term time are a no.

Ours do work a four day week with a Monday off though, so there is scope for Friday night - Monday night long weekends outside of working hours.

It sounds like yours is taking the piss, possibly due to the short contract/current flexibilty re time off in lieu?

Yes, I suspected she was taking the piss but wanted to check what is the standard for other families before I reached a conclusion. In the contract, she is only allowed holidays during the school holidays and by agreement ( usually timed with our holidays). She signed this well before she came to us and had clearly read the contract as she asked questions about it. I did agree to her taking a couple of days off in November at the time she signed the contract as she had a good reason. However on arrival this expanded to 4 days and since then the other requests have followed , all with arguments as to why she need this time or that time off.

The route cause of the problem is she has a previously undiclosed boyfriend (I always ask about boyfriends during the interview process to assess the possibility of homesickness or of them cutting short their planned stay). This one said she didn't have one but a few weeks later when she arrived had seemingly acquired one she is having trouble living without.??. So since she arrived and announced the existence of the boyfriend everything has been revolving around this, including her plan to cut short her stay to March instead of July.

The latest time off has been presented as a fait accompli because i have already told her she can't take more holiday so she is trying a different tactic instead of asking in advance. I think that probably signifies how things would be post Christmas. Hence I am now reviewing childcare plans for after Christmas! Thanks everyone for your comments so far.

That's a major hassle and annoyance. I would cut my losses and look for a new one to start after Christmas until summer hols - otherwise you'll be mucking about until next summer :(