Settling in..how long?

[missy111]

My LB has been going to childminders for over a month now. He still cries on drop off/pick up but is generally ok during the day. He is there two days a week..
How long before he settles and doesn't cry? It's horrid to see him so upset every time.

I would say that providing your LO is happy within a few minutes of you leaving that I would stop worrying about it (maybe ask the cm to send a pic 5 minutes after you leave). Some children settle quickly and easily, some will always cry at drop off. Transition is tricky for some children and isn't something that will always 'wear' off over time. As a mum too I understand how heartbreaking it is to leave an upset child too though!

My lil one did that for about 4-6 months but it was only for me to see , my childminder said as soon as she closes the door and I was gone he stopped. I used to wait outside and he stopped crying as soon as the door was closed. He has been there 7 months now and he doesnt look back now I'm lucky if I get a kiss goodbye and he nevers wants to leave when i go back to collect him. Just keep at it. It does get better.

Thanks. The CM does send me pictures already, and I can see through the window when I pick him up that he is playing happily until he spots me..just hoping that soon he can be happy to be left there!

It sounds like he is happy to be left there. Like others have said, some children find transitions/handovers hard. If he goes two days a week, that's only about 10 days and he's already happy there.

I am a nanny and have had children go through this stage with me- even though I've had many of them from birth and they are in their own home. As soon as the parents leave then they stop crying and grizzling. Like others have said its the transition. Sometimes the children will also cry and cling to me when a parent gets home. They are fine once I've left.

Children also are very clever and know how to push your buttons in order to make you feel bad I think haha they settle soon because they know they will have a fun day and you will come back. Two days is also a short amount of time, especially if he has rest of week with just you. Unless he is hysterically crying and refusing to go in, I wouldn't worry!! It does happen, some children who I have looked after for a yr occasionally have a moan, especially if mom hangs around to chat longer than normal, but if it's a swift drop off they come in, and play straight away!

Hi, I am going through the same. DS is 3 years old and started going to childminders 5 days a week (2 hours a day as of now). It’s been a week, and he still cries and clings to me at the time of separation. My childminder says he gets settled within 5-10 minutes, once I leave. I believe her because when I go to pick him up, he is usually playing with other kids and looks OK. It seems normal phenomenon with above experiences, but I am just curious to know what she might be doing to stop him crying? And how long will it take to get a happy goodbye kiss, it’s heartbreaking to leave DS in such a state.

My DS started nursery at 18mnths and never didn't cry till he started school. I did stop getting upset by it after a while as I knew he had stopped crying when I was out of sight.

I had to change my mind set when I left