What would be the best childcare and domestic help with newborn and 7 year old?

[MGMidget]

I'm expecting a baby in a few months and have a seven year old so will need to do school runs, homework supervision etc. I am planning to breastfeed so will be pretty much glued to the newborn for much of the time in the early weeks and, of course, sleep-deprived. I'm not expecting any help from family members and DH may not even take his two weeks paternity leave so I really need to look for some paid help.

I'm trying to decide what would be the best form of help and looking for advice. I think a doula would probably be relatively expensive for very limited help and I'm not really looking for expertise on a newborn as I feel I've done it before. Therefore, I'm currently considering whether a mothers' help or au pair might be the best option.

As I see it an au pair could potentially do the school runs and homework supervision and generally keep my 7 year old occupied, thereby giving me more time to focus on the newborn. On the other hand perhaps a mothers' help could take care of the newborn for short periods whilst I do the school run myself and do homework supervision with my 7 year old? Presumably a mother's help could also occupy/play with a 7 year old generally too and help with some domestic chores just as an au pair could. I'm wondering which would be the most useful to me or if there would be much difference? I think mothers helps are young people, like au pairs, without much experience so I wondered if one is likely to be more useful than the other in my circumstances and if a mother's help would be suitable for short periods of care of a newborn? I wouldn't ask an au pair to look after a newborn. Does anyone have experience of using an au pair or mother's help (or other childcare) in similar circumstances and how did it work out? Thank you!

Oh, and just to add, I would plan to get the childcare in place well before the newborn arrives so that my 7 year old doesn't feel pushed aside. He is used to au pairs anyway for before/after school care so I am hoping that will go smoothly.

I see a mothers help as an all rounder, like one mom going to help another. An au pair, unless you are lucky and get an exceptional one, often needs lots of direction and telling what to do. Therefore, I would say mothers help. Also do you want/have space for au pair, when as you say you will be sleep deprived and may just want to hang out in your pjs?

I think whatever you decide, you are right to organise well in advance of babies arrival, so that that is one less thing to worry about afterwards!

A mother's help sounds a good plan consider what you need first do you need all day help a split day won't be appealing to as many people as a full or Half day.

I am due a second in Nov and husband has enough annual leave for 2weeks off (can't afford to take paternity leave) so means only bank hols off over Xmas as well.

I am having an elective section and he will take a week then, my mum will then come for a week then husband another week off and hopefully I will be driving by then as 4yr old school is 1.75-2miles away and he can't walk that far and not so sure I want to use a buggy board so soon.

I am planning to breast feed to as I did before and think can still do things with older one whilst feeding just be next to them feeding while doing homework, book reading etc.

Good luck with new baby :)

Eastmids. I had a section and insurance didn't let me drive for 6 weeks and I needed signing off my doctor. You might want to check whether you'd be covered as it counts as major surgery. It was unplanned due to DS heartbeat so I wasn't bashed around but still found just sitting in a car as a passenger uncomfortable.