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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

Do I buy our nanny a birthday present??

22 replies

mulberrylover · 10/07/2014 15:08

I apologise if this is an odd question.

Our nanny started with us last week- and it is her birthday next Wednesday. I asked my ex about it (as he had a nanny many years ago with his older children) and he told me they never brought their nannies present.

I thought it a bit odd?? My friend gives hers a bit of a cash bonus but she's a "giving" person anyway.

Is it expected? I'd hate to make things awkward.

OP posts:

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Hobby2014 · 10/07/2014 15:11

I have no idea what the right thing to do is, but as she's only, been with you a tiny amount of time I'd just maybe buy a box of chocolates or something. Just a small gesture. Next year if you feel she warrants something more, ie bonus or proper present then I'd get / do something more substantial. But that's just me, I don't have a nanny!

Artandco · 10/07/2014 15:21

I would. As just started just a card made by kids and bottle wine/ or small box chocs would be a nice gesture. A larger cash gift can be given next year if you want to do that

Callaird · 10/07/2014 15:24

My bosses always buy me a present!

I've had spa vouchers, money or something to do with my hobbies (photography and reading) costs from £25 - £250.

However, I don't expect anything other than a card and something from the children (a homemade card from them and/or a small gift that they have chosen or made (cup/photo frame they have drawn on or their hand/foot prints) ) anything extra is a huge bonus.

As she has been there a short time a card and box of chocolates/book voucher depending on how much you appreciate her! (My new boss gave me £200 for a new handbag 6 weeks after I started as I broke the zip on mine and she said that she is so happy that I am working for her! Which is so lovely and I did tell her that there was no need!)

LadderToTheMoon · 10/07/2014 15:24

Don't have a nanny, nor ever had a nanny, but I certainly would give her a card and something small as mentioned above. Who doesn't like receiving things on their birthday? It'll make her feel welcome.

donkir · 10/07/2014 15:31

My bosses get me presents but they are in no way expected. I also get their ds's pressies for bday and Christmas. I spend about £15 on them each but my bosses go overboard on me (which is lovely) but I can feel uncomfortable. It shows how much they appreciate the effort and extra hard work I put in. As sometimes at the end of the day there's not enough time to say thanks

I'd definitely get a card and box if chocs and then see how you feel next year.

chocoholicanon · 10/07/2014 18:08

As a nanny I've always received a present from my bosses on birthdays, but then I always buy for my charges.

On my birthday this year I was 4 weeks into a temp job when my bosses surprised me with a lovely orchid and box of chocolates. I think a small gesture this year to your nanny does help build good relationships and will show that you appreciate a hopefully good start to the job.

Blondeshavemorefun · 10/07/2014 19:20

Have always had card and pressies from my bosses - tho some nannies I know their bosses forgot/got nothing :(

That is hurtful

A card is a must and yes your nanny hasn't been with you for long but flowers or wine and finishing even an hour early is nice if you can

itsazoohere · 10/07/2014 19:49

Ummm...I guess you could flip the question and ask yourself would you feel it a nice gesture if you or your dcs received a gift/card from her?
My eldest is a nanny, and bought thoughtful gifts for the family she works for, although she has been with them for much longer.
They (rightfully) adore her and reciprocate.

justdance01 · 10/07/2014 19:59

Lovely idea from Blonde to give an hour off work early - if possible.

Crazyblonde · 11/07/2014 07:33

I've been working for the same family for 5 years, my birthday always falls when they are away on holiday and I have never received a present from them - I get a card through the post - just one they bought, not made by children or anything. It does upset me because I buy for all 3 of their children and whilst I don't expect them to buy me something, a homemade card or even an hour off would be so appreciated, given the amount of time I've been there.
So in response to your OP, I think it would be lovely if you got her a small gift.

Karoleann · 11/07/2014 09:10

I always did, usually a voucher from her favourite shop and a card made by the children.
I actually don't like receiving a present from our nanny on my birthday though, so I make it clear when giving her a gift that I don't want one in return!

Crowen85 · 11/07/2014 11:09

My previous family, hired me a few weeks before my birthday and they bought me a lovey selection of cakes from a bakery.

I think it's a nice way to show appreciation for your nanny by giving a small token.

Crowen85 · 11/07/2014 11:10

I always give free babysitting as a present, and a card from the baby.

Blondeshavemorefun · 11/07/2014 13:25

i dont buy pressies for parents, but always give a card, as i buy pressies for the dc i look after

MaryWestmacott · 11/07/2014 13:29

As she's only just started, then something small from the DCs, box of chocolates would be good.

In the future, then yes, a birthday (and Christmas) gift would be appropriate.

MaryWestmacott · 11/07/2014 13:29

oh and it might be nice if your DCs are old enough to make a card for her this weekend.

eurycantha · 11/07/2014 15:10

I have always been given a card and gift from the families I work for and always get the children a gift.I usually give the parents a nights baby sitting,I live out and rarely baby sit for them.

rootypig · 11/07/2014 15:11

Yes! it's a lovely opportunity to get your relationship onto a warm footing. Agree with card, chocs or wine, and an hour off. Marvellous.

barewith · 13/07/2014 14:12

In a word ..yes. Get the children to make a card at least.

Happy36 · 15/07/2014 14:48

The children make a card and cupcakes to eat at our house for their "afternoon snack" which they have with their nanny. We also buy her a bunch of flowers from the whole family and 50 pounds of department store vouchers.

With our old nanny the children wanted to give her a "party" and her birthday is always during school holidays so they always had an afternoon out (usually going to see a kids´ film then getting milkshakes or ice-cream - probably not her idea of a perfect birthday but really it was just an opportunity for the kids to enjoy a treat with her). With the new nanny we will see what feels right but I imagine the "gifts" will be similar. Her birthday is around Easter time so may sometimes fall during school holidays.

PhoebeMcPeePee · 15/07/2014 14:50

Card & a cake to have with the children seems ideal

TheIronGnome · 19/07/2014 14:29

Presents are always appreciated! I was always jealous of a nanny friend of mine who always had a party thrown for her by the family she worked for, like a kids birthday party type thing with surprise presents, and party food and music.

I've had my birthday fall between nanny jobs 3 times now, so often miss out... It's lovely to feel appreciated, especially when you buy presents for he children on their birthdays which I always have done.

If you don't know what to get you can't go wrong with amazon or department store gift cards.

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