Nanny Advice - some Qs please

[WantToGetItRight]

I am about to employ a FT live in nanny for the first time (it is also the first time the nanny has worked as a live in nanny) and want to make sure that I get it right.

What is the norm with meals? I would expect the nanny to eat with the children and mostly eat what they are having during the working day but what about weekends? Would she expect to be invited to eat with us or left to her own devices? Is it normal to pay a food allowance or simply add her requests to the weekly shop?

We dont have a seperate kitchen for her so she will need to access ours as and when - this is fine but would it be helpful/appropriate to have her own fridge/kettle etc in her room?

Also the DC are at school in the day - what do you expect your nanny to do, if anything. I was thinking that in term time I will tell her she is mostly free to do as she wishes although I expect her to be available to work if required (kids sick, or child related chores). Is this standard?

I am planning on having a very frank conversation about expectations since it is new ground for us both but would be interested in employees comments on things they'd done differently and nannies thoughts on things that have particualrly worked/not worked for them.

TIA

Hi,
When I have had my own separate kitchen, I have eaten lunch with the children but bought/made my own breakfast and tea every day (and lunch at weekends obviously).
When sharing a kitchen, I have been welcome to eat with the children or the parents for all meals during the week if I choose to. I do my own thing at weekends.
I have been allowed a microwave, mini fridge and kettle in my room which is a really nice touch if I wan my own space, but it's not a necessity.
I have been told that I can add things to shopping list if I wish, but I generally just eat what everyone else has and what's around. If I really fancy something I will just pop to shop and get it. But sometimes employers learn what things are my favourite and buy them without me asking occasionally, which is a really nice treat and a pleasant surprise when unpacking shopping :)

With duties when children are at school, I was always told to just relax while I can! It's not time off because you need to be local incase school ring etc, and nothing can really be planned incase you need to stay home with sick child last minute. I would normally take them to school, come back and clean up after breakfast, go to gym, come home and prepare dinner to save me doing it later, have a tidy up and maybe hang washing out etc and generally potter. It's also a good time for the nanny to go to appointments to save you having to miss work To cover nanny when she needs to see doc, dentist etc.

Just be completely clear and upfront about everything you need from the beginning. Better to start off with 'worst case' and things you might need 'just in case' rather than having a rose tinted view of job and having things added to duties all the time.

When live in nannying I mostly eat with children while on duty however it is nice to be able to prepare snack after work as well. One family made me feel very uncomfortable using kitchen after work and 5pm was very early to have tea and nothing for rest of night, I ended up spending a fortune in Starbucks on cups of tea in evening. Good idea to have kettle and mini fridge if space allows in bedroom. For the weekends I used to add things to online list or pick things up with kitty money, maybe good idea to put a limit on it although most nannies will respect how much to buy. Maybe ask her a few fav things to get in every week and things like fruit ask if she will eat so you can order extras in.

I would expect nanny to do all nursery duties and even some freezer meals for children which may be good for weekends or during holidays.