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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

Is this the done thing?

26 replies

rockybalboa · 04/04/2014 20:06

A friend of mine is utterly stuck for childcare for 3 days in Aug (her CM is on hols, work won't let her have both weeks off and she has no family help). She's a single mum who doesn't earn much and I was wondering whether I could ask our nanny to have the little boy for the two days she does for us. The week in question she won't actually have my two older DC as they are off staying with MIL that week so it would just be the nanny and the baby (he'll be just 1 by then). There would be no school run to worry about and my friend would drop her son at our home and pick him up again. Is it appropriate to even ask our nanny to do this? Are there any special rules about looking after children other than those of your employer (even if just for a few days)?

Thanks!

OP posts:

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nannynick · 04/04/2014 20:37

Would be a bit odd with your own children not being there. Your nanny would have been able to request the time off as part of annual leave, or you may have given it as additional paid leave, or you could have asked them to come in during that time and do non-childcare duties. So whilst it is a bit unusual, you could certainly ask.
The childminding regulations would not apply, as it is not a nanny caring for children from three families at the same time.

If there is some form of written agreement, then I suspect insurance would still be valid. Your home insurance may not cover it but it might fall under the same thing as if any other visitor came into your home. That sort of thing you don't really know until a claim is made.

The child does not know your nanny. Maybe that needs to be thought about - how could nanny and the child/baby get to know each other a bit before hand?

Does it involve any change of working hours for your nanny? Does it affect their plans for taking some of their annual leave? You nanny may expect to have time off whilst your children are not present - though there is not a legal right to that to my knowledge, though I feel you should discuss it with your nanny with the aim of getting their agreement to care for your friends child.

NannyR · 04/04/2014 20:54

I think this sounds fine, I've done the same thing in the past.
Meeting the little boy beforehand sounds a good idea, maybe invite him round for tea one day.

Original poster

rockybalboa · 04/04/2014 21:39

Nannynick, my DC3 will be with the nanny, it is just the two older ones (who are at school and nursery during term time). We have already discussed annual leave and the nanny is actually off the following week and the previous week. No change to hours because my working hours wouldn't change. It would just be the extra child at our house for two days with my DC3.

OP posts:

Original poster

rockybalboa · 04/04/2014 21:41

Sorry, that should have said that it is just my two oldest DC who will be away with their grandmother, DC3 is too little to go.

OP posts:

nannynick · 04/04/2014 22:07

Sounds fine, plus as you have quite a young child as well, your nanny will have the baby/toddler experience.

MoonRover · 04/04/2014 22:13

Will the nanny be paid?

PhoebeMcPeePee · 04/04/2014 22:34

I'm not sure why but this feels a bit cheeky to me but as it is actually a practical solution to a (presumably) one-off problem, why not offer her time & a half with other mum picking up the extra cost as a sweetener to having a new child.

NannyAnna · 05/04/2014 07:56

I would hope/expect for a pay increase for having the extra child. Your nanny will feel difficult saying no as she won't want to upset anyone but she is taking on extra responsibility in doing this and will deserve to be compensated with at least an extra £5 per hour. The other mother should pay for this.

Blondeshavemorefun · 05/04/2014 08:27

I'm sure if you ask the nanny nicely and offer payment she won't mind

Your friend would have had to pay the cm so maybe what she would have paid her your friend can pay your nanny

We are talking 2 days - not a lifetime

The nanny may enjoy earning extra money while still having less then 3 children as usually does

But ask don't tell :)

slowcomputer · 05/04/2014 11:01

I think it depends how much give and take you generally have.

I give my nanny an afternoon off every now and then (if I get off work early, or my Mum wants to pick up my daughter from school) - I'm often back 15-30 minutes early and I gave her the day off work for a hospital appt with no pay docked and didn't ask her to take it as annual leave. In return she sometimes does an extra hour for free and I'm sure she'd do this without wanting extra money. But if there was no give and take from me, there would be less from her.

GoAndAskDaddy · 05/04/2014 13:01

I think this is perfectly reasonable, especially ad your nanny has 2 less children than usual. I can't see the logic in being expected to pay your nanny more than usual. In fact I think that is a cheek - but then I'm not a nanny.

Blondeshavemorefun · 05/04/2014 13:52

its not working extra hours/5 mins late etc which can be give and take

its having another child who probably has never met the nanny before for maybe 10hrs a day

could be hours of hell for her

Runoutofideas · 05/04/2014 14:17

I think she should be offered extra money, as this is not a child she is contracted to look after and could be much harder work for her than the family's older children who she already knows and has a relationship with. She is employed to look after those specific children, not random children of the parents choosing! If she is asked nicely and paid a bit more then she probably won't see it as a cheeky request, but it should be the nanny's choice whether to do it or not.

eurycantha · 05/04/2014 20:34

I am a nanny and I look after three if two were away I would be happy to help your friend out but to be honest I would expect some cash for helping out .perhaps you could offer her what your friend would be paying her childminder.I have done this for employers friends several times but only for one day,I don't really expect money when it is one day but as it is three your friend should definitely give her something.

Laquitar · 05/04/2014 20:47

She is probably looking forward to having just one child.
Imo is very cheeky. If you run a Restaurant or a shop and there are not customers would you tell the waiter to clean your kitchen in your house instead?
The way you put it that she has less work on that week it doesnt sound very nice tbh. But if you ask her nicely and offer extra pay then it is ok.
As she doesnt know the child it is going to be hard work for her and stressful.

OutragedFromLeeds · 06/04/2014 12:50

It's fine. You need to ask, not tell and she needs to be paid extra, but it's a perfectly reasonable request.

thedrunkenduck · 06/04/2014 12:55

So all you nannies who think it cheeky- would you not let your charges have friends round for the day? As surely that's looking after an extra child without additional reimbursement

NannyR · 06/04/2014 13:55

I don't think it's the same as having friends around. I quite like having kids round (who are friends and the same age); it makes my job easier, as the kids have company and it's usually reciprocated, so one extra this week but one less when my charge goes for a playdate at their friends house.

If I'm having a child round purely as a favour to help out with child care problems, that's fine as long as I've been asked about it but it would be nice to be acknowledged that you are helping someone out. Sometimes parents give you some chocolates or wine (for example, a school friend who may well have come round for a playdate, but I end up keeping them all day, because of parent needing last minute child care).

In the OPs situation, whilst I wouldn't mind at all having the child, I think it would be appropriate to be paid as its a bit different to having school friends round.

Laquitar · 06/04/2014 14:32

Thedrunkenduck
when my nanny (who is my dn and works as my nanny) have playdates she usually has an invite back so the next week the eldest will go to the other house for tea so it balances out. In this case op's nanny doesn't gain anything so she should get extra pay imo.

OutragedFromLeeds · 06/04/2014 14:55

Any playdates that happen during my working hours are at my discretion. I choose who, when and for how long. That's completely different to being told that you'll be looking after an additional unknown child for the whole day.

To answer your question, no I probably wouldn't allow them to have a friend round for the whole day, a portion of the day sure, but 8am-6pm? No.

2468Motorway · 07/04/2014 23:07

I think you ask the nanny whether she wants to do it first of all. I do also think she should be paid extra for it. I appreciate your friend may not have lots of spare cash but while the nanny may be happy to help, she is not obliged to.

ceeveebee · 07/04/2014 23:24

My nanny would do this and has in the past, i would expect to pay her some additional money to reflect extra responsibility - maybe an extra 25% of her usual hourly rate?

Blondeshavemorefun · 07/04/2014 23:46

Check with nanny and surely whatever the friend is paying her cm she can pay your nanny the same extra

Very diff from organising play dates with similar ages friends for 2/3hrs an am/pm - which you hope will be reciprocated then having to look after 10hrs a child who will be a stranger and may be unhappy all day

NomDeClavier · 08/04/2014 08:41

You're asking her to undertake a nanny share so she should be paid to reflect that. It's not less work, it may in fact be more to balance different routines (siblings have always had to work around each other but this may be a long morning nap for one child and a long afternoon for the other) and different preferences.

I'm sure your nanny will do it but it would be unreasonable to dump it on her last minute and with no incentive.

emily94 · 14/04/2014 17:33

As far as the Nanny agrees i think it's fine. I've done the same in the past.

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