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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Original poster

late to collect, so I didn't wait!

57 replies

happydazed · 11/02/2014 23:35

I'm a cm and one of my parents is always late to collect. I have fined her, complained, explained impact on me, my family, other kids. It makes no difference, she apologises but is then at least 10 mins often 40 mins late.

I was going out tonight so waited 10 mins, didn't show so I left and took her child with me. I texted address and said to meet me there, the place is hard to find and she got lost, she wasn't pleased said why can't you just fine me.

I know I can fine her but it's not effective, and I don't want the extra money I want to leave work on time! A friend has said she would be furious if she went to her children's nursery and they weren't there even if she was late. I ended up delaying her an hour tonight when she was only 10 mins late, however I still feel it's fair enough really, am I wrong.

OP posts:
SoldeInvierno · 12/02/2014 12:08

5 pounds is very little. I would happily pay that for the flexibility of turning up whenever, but I would not do it, out of respect. In her mind, she pays you the fine and that makes it all ok. Total disrespect so you will have to be firmer for her to understand.

LingDiLong · 12/02/2014 13:26

God, how annoying. I'm so lucky that my parents never do this. On the rare occasion they are a bit late it's only a few minutes and they are very apologetic.

I would at least double that fine and, yes, write it into your policy that the child might have to go with you to wherever you need to be. Was the parent contactable at all within the time she was late?

Mojang · 12/02/2014 13:34

I do think you were (a bit) unreasonable actually - but not as much as her.

For some working families though financial penalties will never work, as they can be cash rich, time poor. If your fine of £10 or £20 means they can finish the work they needed to, or grab 30 mins to themselves, then they're happy to pay.

From your POV (I imagine) it's not about the money either, it's about the impact her lateness has on the rest of your life.

I think it would be entirely reasonable to have a three strikes and you're out rule. That's what we do at the out of school care that I run. Penalties cover costs (2 staff member's wages) for the over-run time but be late 3 times and you don't come back!

PeterParkerSays · 12/02/2014 13:41

My DS went to a nursery. If a parent hadn't picked up after 40 minutes at the end of the day, their policy was to phone 2nd or 3rd contacts, grandma, dad etc then phone social services. Would she rather deal with social services instead?

Why should you fine her? She'll see it as a way of her paying for additional childcare from you to fit in with her crap time management.

I know that you love having the child but this woman is taking advantage. I'd seriously be looking at giving the mother notice if this continues. You'll be able to make a place for another child who fits in well, but who also has a parent with decent time keeping.

Blondeshavemorefun · 12/02/2014 15:29

so £30 per hour late, i can understand why some busy working parents may take advantage of that - in the long run £30 isnt much

i would up your late fees

glenthebattleostrich · 12/02/2014 17:02

My late fees are £1 per minute. If the parent isn't there after 30 minutes then I call the other contacts to come get the child. If they can't I call social services

This did solve my late parent, who also used to take up to 30 minutes at handover to get out of my house.

The hard bit is standing firm, the parent in question was furious I'd called her mum to get the kids especially when she was Presented with a £63 bill. She was told if I had to go to those extremes again I'd solve the problem by giving notice.

Harsh yes, but as much as I love the children on my care, I love my child more and when my job impacts negatively on her something has to change.

NatashaBee · 12/02/2014 17:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bilberry · 12/02/2014 17:39

I remember this as an example on a management course; a nursery started fining parents who were late but found this actually increase the incidence of late pickups as parents simply saw the fine as a payment for an additional service! Depending on your ease at finding clients, it might be more effective to say 'three strikes and you are out'?

Paintyfingers · 12/02/2014 17:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mojang · 12/02/2014 17:48

Yes, we've found that Billberry, a "what"s your problem, I paid for it" attitude.

I also think that if op makes a habit of telling parents she's taking their child tiher dc's swimming lesson etc they'll see that as an excuse to be the full hour or more late and collect when you get home.

handcream · 12/02/2014 17:49

I am really surprised at the number of issues around pick ups. And also late payers. Who do these people entitled people think they are! I agree 5 is neither here or there. Our old CM had an issue with a family who would just turn up when they like. Child booked in for afternoon and then granny would turn up give a tenner or what ever she had in her purse and pick up just as tea was being served.

You sound lovely to have around children but sadly people will take advantage of you. Why not have a formal conversation with her. Say it has happened say 3 times in the last 2 weeks and it cannot go on. If it continues sadly you will have to give notice. I suspect she will become all snotty and then try and do exactly the same to her next CM (if she can find one!) CM's do talk.....

WhoWasThatMaskedWoman · 12/02/2014 17:56

DCs' after school club charges a quid a minute late fee. I agree that you can get trapped into a "what the hell, I'm paying for it" mind set, but expressing it per minute does focus the mind a bit more perhaps?

Paintyfingers · 12/02/2014 18:37

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

caroldecker · 12/02/2014 19:00

Generally fining parents increases late pick-ups as many can afford it and stop feeling guilty (as you are earning, so no problem), calling secondary contacts is better as exerts social pressure on the Mum, rather than economic.

WhoWasThatMaskedWoman · 12/02/2014 19:07

Oh I like the idea of calling back up contacts. That's sneaky.

Blondeshavemorefun · 13/02/2014 11:41

If a parent is late then do they ring and tell you or you just have to wait for them to turn up

I like the calling contacts - as then they will collect and have a go at parent parent will understand hopefully what they are doing is wrong

Calling ss seems a bit ott

Maybe 3rd strike and out?

Original poster
happydazed · 13/02/2014 11:51

she was late again yesterday! New plan is to knock it off next day, so if she's 10 mins late to collect I'm not letting her in till 10 past 8 in the morning,will make her late for work but I can't think what else to do, this child is my ds best friend and really don't want to give notice. She's always on time for drop off!

OP posts:
tiggytape · 13/02/2014 12:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PeterParkerSays · 13/02/2014 12:12

happydazed, that is a fab idea. What did she say?

Will you be able to work it so this doesn't impact on other mindees / she doesn't sneak the child in with other mindees arriving at the same time?

anewyear · 13/02/2014 18:58

ForgetableTampon - please dont forget, not all have a qualification, especially those that have been minding a long long time! you were not 'required' too 10, 15 , 20 odd years ago.
I myself, only gained my level 3 April 2013, despite my working in Childcare for many years.

ForgettableTampon · 13/02/2014 19:22

Good point, anew

Apologies to OP Flowers

Mrscupcake23 · 14/02/2014 10:38

Surely you wouldn't leave a mother and child outside for ten minutes ?

Think this is all getting a bit petty now think you should just give her notice.

LingDiLong · 14/02/2014 11:04

No, no, no. NOT a good idea, really, really not a good idea. You will be in breach of your contract with her if you do that. Plus, think how upsetting it will be for the poor child to be stood on the doorstep confused about why she can't just go in? This will destroy your relationship with the parent altogether if you get into this kind of game playing. You might as well just give notice as the end result will be the same.

I really hope you haven't done this.

Mrscupcake23 · 14/02/2014 11:25

I agree lingdilong. I feel sorry for the child it's not her fault.

LauraBridges · 14/02/2014 12:00

Up the fines. Some of we mothers earn over £200 an hour. I don't see why the poor childminder should be put out. We always were back in time for our nanny whatever it took as she has her own life to lead.