Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Flip

Original poster

interviewing Au pair face to face

22 replies

celtic66 · 03/08/2006 17:45

This is a rare opportunity for me to be able to meet a potential Au pair, I have done this once before and it was a disaster!Need some advice.

This girl has not been AP before but has relevant experience. At this stage i don't want her to meet my present Ap as I'm furious with her( just found out she has been taking in a neighbours washing and ironing using our facilities when i'm at work)as a result she is very moody.
Would you interview her to your home or meet somewhere?
With children present? I have four and is usually hectic/
She has no real check-able reference so want to get as much info as poss, any suggestions welcome.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

SSSandy · 03/08/2006 17:58

If current AP can cope with all 4 dc, I'd arrange for them to go somewhere and then invite the prospective AP to your home for the interview. She's also curious to see where she'd be working

Original poster

celtic66 · 03/08/2006 18:40

She can't really cope with all 4 out and about, and really needs two adults, which would have been perfect as current AP would be out as well. It would normally be AP's day off, and she is usually at home Saturday afternoons.

It would be nice to see how she relates to kids but i know she would be really put off. IME I find when new AP arrive the kids behaviour is TOO MUCH ( Even I feel like leaving)for the first few days, then things calm down, and poor AP usually looks worried and overwhelmed.

OP posts:

SSSandy · 03/08/2006 18:44

Could you meet this AP at a cafe with an indoor playground? Do you know the kind of thing I mean? It would be fairly loud of course but she would see the kids and you'd hopefully be able to have a conversation. Not ideal I know.

Alternatively, could your mum look after the kids in your home and you meet the AP somewhere?

ks · 03/08/2006 18:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

SSSandy · 03/08/2006 18:53

How did you find the (new) AP? Agree with ks, surely there is someone who can vouch for her in some way even if not specifically as a child minder?

ks · 03/08/2006 18:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster

celtic66 · 03/08/2006 19:09

What really wanted to say was no previous check-able refs with family. She does have employers refs from a hotel, and refs a nursery in her country, which I will follow up, I found her on gumtree and got really good vibe's, she was the first AP to actually ask relevant questions about the children. The only thing she can't fully explain how she came to be in the UK.... have a feeling somthing may be revealed like boyfriend situation.

OP posts:

Original poster

celtic66 · 03/08/2006 19:36

KS in some situations I have not really followed family and character refs but just really too and chance but checked passport and official documents with home address on in case anything goes horribly wrong.

One of my friends is an ex nanny and reminds me of horrible stories of what Au pairs when breached family trust ect ? and insists that we should install a ?nanny cam? in the playroom when Au pair has sole charge after school pick of 2 children?. I guess that?s another thread.

I?m really disappointed with current AP ? and washing and ironing has been going on for ages

OP posts:

SSSandy · 03/08/2006 19:45

celtic, think drop in unexpectedly in the beginning is the way I would play it. Thing with camera is she'll be with them in other rooms too and you won't have a camera in every room, will you? Hope it works out and you like this AP.

Don't think much of your neighbour. Surely he/she should have checked with you?

Original poster

celtic66 · 03/08/2006 20:17

Sandy ? no i don't think much of neighbour,Au pair was doing some cleaning for her once a week ( she?s an Air Steward) and Au pair was desperate for extra cash, so offered to do laundry in my house so neighbour could sleep during the day, but I think she was doing other peoples ironing as well.

I think the camera idea was because I never get chance to check up, and I?ve had a bad experience with another AP, and now, our so trustworthy Au pair has had the cheek to run a laundry service ( could be a lot worse). I am just not feeling very trusting at the moment. But yes, can?t install one in every room but generally kids spend hours in playroom ? all toys are there, and if AP is never with then, then she not doing as per agreement.

OP posts:

Alipiggie · 03/08/2006 20:20

I would meet her in neutral location i.e hotel reception or something. That's how I was interviewed many many years ago. Put several scenarios re: childcare to her to see what answers are. For example if child is seriously naughty, hitting how would she deal with it. If child was ill - choking how would she deal with it. Try not to prompt her and see how she handles it. Then if you like her, arrange a second interview at the playground so you can gauge your children's reaction to her as mummy's friend. Hope this helps.

thechildsslave · 03/08/2006 21:08

I have to ask how did you find out she was doing the washing. ?

Original poster

celtic66 · 03/08/2006 21:32

Alipiggie thanks for ideas. I thought about taking one my youngest with me and she how she reacts ? but may be too distracting. Just really want to make most of the opportunity!!!

I found someone else?s washing in the machine, Au pair tried to tell me it was a friends
Excessive amounts of washing soap I was buying on each shop
Iron always in Au Pairs room.
Was finding unknown clothing trapped in door of the machine (too small to be AP)

OP posts:

SSSandy · 03/08/2006 21:34

Makes me wonder what else she's been up to.

thechildsslave · 03/08/2006 21:50

So as well as being sneeky she was bloody stupid as well . Dozy mare .

thechildsslave · 03/08/2006 21:51

OH just a thought do you know any thing about body language . (some one on here must do ) That might give you a few clues on her .

thechildsslave · 03/08/2006 21:54

OH just a thought do you know any thing about body language . (some one on here must do ) That might give you a few clues on her . Or there is this address . I found it really interesting
www.handwritingwizard.com/login.phtml

Original poster

celtic66 · 03/08/2006 21:57

Makes me wonder? but very, disappointing she?s been here for 12 month with no real problems but must admit have been too busy to notice what goes on when we're all out.

Au pair said she needed extra cash, we pay her the going rate plus extra for other hours, she also has does some cleaning and regular babysitting for another family, However since arriving most of her free time is spent shopping (or running laundry services)and has loads new clothes, shoes designer glasses ect and is frantically trying to save for trip to see a her friends

OP posts:

Original poster

celtic66 · 03/08/2006 22:00

basically this happened because of the shopping issue!!

OP posts:

thechildsslave · 04/08/2006 11:08

being nosey!!!! What happened?

whiffy · 04/08/2006 12:20

PMSL at current au-pair turning your house into chinese laundry . Have to say I think you are v restrained in your reaction. How did the interview with the new one go?

Original poster

celtic66 · 04/08/2006 21:01

Was furious at the time about laundry service, and AP is very remorseful, said things got out of hand, it started as a one-off request but said she ended up trying to please everyone, (whilst netting a good income). Things have blown over and differences ironed out!!

Au pair interview is on Saturday meeting in a café with no kids on this occasion, but will still keep at Gum tree and the great au pair website and so far rejected 6 aupair applicants and being rejection 5 times ? not good

OP posts:

Flip