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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

2.5 year old wanting to be carried all the time

14 replies

LingDiLong · 06/02/2014 21:30

One of the children I look after has suddenly decided he doesn't want to walk anywhere, ever. With the weather being awful I am driving on a lot of the school runs so he literally doesn't want to do the short walk from the car to the school gate. I'm insisting that he walks - but gently, lots of distraction and trying to make it fun. He often starts crying though and shouting at me for a cuddle. I'm a bit worried that people will think I'm some awful, neglectful childminder for not picking him up but he's heavy! And I usually have other little ones with me who will also want picking up if he's being carried.

I can't get my pram in the car with all the kids I'm picking up but I am debating getting a small umbrella fold so I can plonk him in there. Although at this age I'd expect my own kids to walk short distances....

How would others handle this?

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ForgettableTampon · 06/02/2014 21:36

okay

stupid question: do his shoes fit/feet need measuring? tried him with wellies?

Original poster

LingDiLong · 06/02/2014 21:44

His shoes seem fine, his parents check them regularly. He's also very forward verbally so I don't think he'd have any problem telling me if his feet hurt! He's not a naturally very physical boy - he loves books and jigsaws rather than running around.

Thanks though, not a stupid question at all.

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Ifcatshadthumbs · 06/02/2014 21:48

My ds was like this until he was four used to drive me nuts? What about a scooter?

Original poster

LingDiLong · 06/02/2014 21:54

Oh blimey, I hope I don't have another 1.5 years of this!! His parents say they haven't noticed him wanting to be carried a lot but he's with me full time so he doesn't really have to walk very far with them.

Not sure about a scooter, I have 2 other pre-schoolers with me on the school run and it would be absolute chaos if they were all on scooters. Plus, we're literally talking about walking a few 100 yards from the car to the school gate! If we walk the school run I take the pram and cajole him to walk part way before letting him get in. That seems to cause less fuss than walking from the car does!

OP posts:

invicta · 06/02/2014 21:54

Is he feeling poorly? Maybe he is under the weather and his legs feel a bit shakey.

If not, stay firm. If you give in, then he'll want to be carried everywhere. Also, don't make a huge fuss. Maybe he's attention seeking.

Original poster

LingDiLong · 06/02/2014 21:58

Invicta, I don't think he is unwell because once we arrive on the school yard he's perfectly happy to run around and play with the play equipment they have out. He just doesn't want to walk! I guess I'll have to just be firm like you say.

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Clearlymisunderstood · 06/02/2014 22:24

Is it safe for the children to "race" from car to the school? My dd is 2.5 and when she starts flagging we generally have a race or I'll hold her hand and we'll run to jump in a puddle or something

FootieOnTheTelly · 06/02/2014 23:02

How about telling him you have injured your back, lots of groaning and clasping of your back should help.

Original poster

LingDiLong · 07/02/2014 08:05

Clearly, I tried that yesterday, he was having none of it! Footie, I might give that a whirl today, it might make him laugh if nothing else!

OP posts:

colditz · 07/02/2014 08:14

Is it not acceptable to just say no?

Ds1 always wanted to be carried, and I just said no!

Karoleann · 07/02/2014 11:45

I'd just get a buggy. DD (who is 3 in April) is exactly the same and I don't really need the extra hassle during school run.
She does plenty of walking with encouragement at other times when the boys are at school/.

anewyear · 07/02/2014 14:25

I wouldnt be carrying him
But then Im horrible and make them walk come rain or shine, we're only a 10 minute walk from school.

Reinette · 07/02/2014 23:27

The 2yo I nanny for has been pulling the "must be carried everywhere" for about four months - before that he insisted on walking everywhere himself.

A few months ago I was diagnosed with a brain tumor which was affecting my balance; it was no longer safe to carry him. So although I had tried and tried to get him to walk by himself for the previous four months, I guess something in my voice changed at that point because now I simply say, "Nope, we are walking today. Take my hand please." and off we go. It's legitimately not possible for me to carry him so I don't entertain any whining or complaining. It's just how things are. I think kids get that pretty quickly if you're consistent (and firm) enough - maybe try less gentle coddling with him and more "We are walking your sister into school now, here we go" while plopping him on his feet is your next method to try?

Original poster

LingDiLong · 07/02/2014 23:40

Reinette, I'm so sorry to hear about your tumour, I hope you're doing ok. I think you might be on to something actually. He did drop his nap a couple of months ago and I do worry that he's genuinely tired at times - even though I'm not asking him to walk far. I'll try a bit more of a matter of fact approach.

Colditz, I probably worry more than I would normally about saying no because he's a childminded child rather than my own. I worry about what people must think of me dragging this sobbing toddler along.

Karoleann, if the no-nonsense approach doesn't work I'll get a buggy I think. Thanks anewyear, that's what I'm like with my own kids! I'm too soft on the others some times I think.

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