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Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Childcare

Do your mindees call you by your first name?

19 replies

mawbroon · 25/07/2006 13:13

That's my question really. Would I be a pompous twit for insisting that they call me Mrs Broon? Also, do you call the mindees parents by their first name in front of the mindees?
I have loads to do getting my business organised and I'm worrying about this!

OP posts:
MrsBigD · 25/07/2006 13:16

mawbroon, when dd was little I used a childminder. To start off with dd called the cm 'mama' simply because that was the only word she could say , after that she progressed to the cm's first name which made cm really sad because she liked being called mama again. DD referred to cm's dh as daddy and my husband as papa. . We were on first name basis with the cm and were all happy and comfortable with it.

However, if you feel more comfortable with the mindees calling you Mrs Broon, go for it. Prepares them for nursery/school . Probably also depends on how old your mindees will be I guess.

Good luck with getting everything sorted

Jimjams2 · 25/07/2006 13:24

erm, I wouldn't place my children with someone who insisited on mrs X. Sorry!

dmo · 25/07/2006 13:29

my mindees call me by my first name
i also hate when c/m want to be called aunty
i call parents by their first names
and my mindees call dh big chris as my son is called chris

Greensleeves · 25/07/2006 13:30

I wouldn't be happy with it either. I think the reason most people choose a childminder as their childcare setting is because it's the closest thing to family life for their child. It would be a bit weird for a childminder to insist on Mrs X IMO.

motherinferior · 25/07/2006 13:31

All the childminders I know are referred to by their first names.

mawbroon · 25/07/2006 13:31

Jimjams2 - can I ask why not?

OP posts:
Mascaraohara · 25/07/2006 13:31

I wouldn't have sent my child to somebody who insisted they where called Mrs < >.

I wouldn't expect my childminder to call me anything than my first name either, if she's talking to my dd about me she will call me mummy if she is talking directly to me she will call me by my first name.

looneytune · 25/07/2006 13:33

Have to agree. First ever mindee called me mummy until she learnt more words and finally realised my name. Always been first name terms with everyone and would never ask to be called Mrs xxx. Mindees mum commented when our kids started nursery and some wanted to be called Mrs xxx. We're used to that now and it is start of school but I think it's odd for a childminder!

Sorry

Xena · 25/07/2006 13:34

My mindees call me by my first name and dh. It would be very strange imo for you to ask them to call you mrs. Not really the home from home childcare that childminding should be. ALl preschools and day care nurseries that I have had contact with the children all call the adults by first names. IME its only when they get to school nursery that they don't.
I wouldn't leave my children with a carer who expected to be called Mrs xxx

looneytune · 25/07/2006 13:34

Same as Mascaraohara, if I talk to mindee about her mum I refer to her as Mummy but I always use first names. You become like 2nd family and Mrs xxx is a bit formal imo!

Mascaraohara · 25/07/2006 13:35

Oh so many posts while I was distracted between writing and posting. bum.

Mascaraohara · 25/07/2006 13:35

and again - D'OH!

CarlyP · 25/07/2006 13:37

think its too formal.

zubb · 25/07/2006 13:41

agree with lots here, wouldn't send my kids to a CM who asked to be called Mrs. X. Far to formal for what's meant to be a second home for them. My childminder calls me by my first name, and the other mindees there do as well. Otherwise it smacks of just being a business transaction to me and not very personal.

mawbroon · 25/07/2006 13:53

OK, well that seems to be pretty unanimous.
I had assumed that mindees would call me by my first name, but when talking to my Dad about childminding, he reckoned that it should be Mrs X. I disagreed with him and said I would put it to the court of MN. In fairness to my dad, he was a teacher for a hundred years and is of a generation where any adult was Mr or Mrs So and So, so I suppose I can see where he was coming from.

Thanks for all your replies ladies.

OP posts:
Bozza · 25/07/2006 14:01

Yes does sound like a generational thing. DS's CM is called by her first name. She refers to me by my first name or "mummy" when talking to DS - eg "we'll have to ask mummy about that". The other mindee's refer to me as "DS's mummy/mum".

Jimjams2 · 25/07/2006 15:17

As the other's have said its too formal. I would imagine it wouldn't be a very easy relationship and I would just not be happy about placing my yyoung children who thought that being called MrsX was important. I guess I would treat it as a sign that we would be unlikely to see things in the same way. Which sounds a bit OTT, but is how it would make me feel! I think it produces a different relationship. DS2's nursery teachers are first names, ds1's school teachers are first names (although ds2's school in Sept will be Mrs X), and ds3's childminders are first names. ONe of the things I liked about switching ds1's school was that we went from Mrs X to first names, and it made the constant communication we need with the school to be easier, and also makes me feel as if we are working together (he has SN).

ThePrisoner · 25/07/2006 19:00

One of my mindees calls me "Evil Childminder". Goes down well at the school gates.

Katymac · 25/07/2006 19:02

I'm cultivating

"O illustrious ruler of the universe"....however most of mine seem to be preverbal atm (or at least they can't manage that)

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