What am I looking for?

[rockybalboa]

I have 3 DS aged 5, 2.5 and 4m. I will be going back to work next year and the oldest two will be at school/nursery and the younger one potentially with a childminder (Ds2 and DS3 with my parents two days a week). DS1 and DS2 are at after school club at the moment but I am considering other options as we have housekeeping types jobs that need doing. I don't know what the correct job title is for what I am looking for or whether my 'ideal' is simply too pie in the sky for anyone.

In an ideal world, two days a week someone would come to the house at 2pm, spend an hour doing light cleaning, (we have separate cleaners), laundry, changing bedding etc then pick DS1 and DS2 up after school, bring them home and supervise them whilst getting on with other cleaning/housekeeping tasks plus making making tea. I would then be home at 5/5.30ish. Current plan is that DS3 will be with a childminder on those two days until he's old enough for the school nursery so whoever we used would pick him up from the childminder after the school run but I guess that if they were a nanny they could have him all day and we wouldn't need the childminder.

What am I looking for? Am I being unrealistic? Any hints/tips would be gratefully received as we've only ever used private day nurseries before so this is a whole new area for me.

Thanks!

Does your requirement for childcare and/or housework change when the children are not at school? What start time, finish time?

With 3 children, cost of childcare can be quite high and thus it can make sense to have a nanny as they are not paid on a per-child basis.

Your 2.5 year old goes to after-school club?

Would you only be working 2 days per week?
Are your parents long term committed to doing care of older two children, or do you think they would prefer not to have the commitment of doing it on that regular a basis?

Any budget for childcare? A rough figure may help determine what is and is not affordable.

So, in answer to Nanny Nick's questions:

Requirements would stay the same for most of the school holidays as DS1 and DS2 would go to holiday club (although obviously DH and I will take time off for family holidays throughout the year). The 2.5 yo is at nursery at DS1's school (paid for as he's not eligible for his 15 hours yet) and the nursery session finishes at the same time as school so they go to after school club together until 5. I don't actually need them at after school club at the moment as I'm on maternity leave but was told that if I didn't put them in at the start of term we were unlikely to get places for when I go back to work. They both love going, especially being there together as they get on really well and play together. They get tea there and school dinners. Holiday club is run by the after school club and is available from 8-6.

I will be working 4 days a week and will be doing school drop off and start work at 9.30. My parents are committed to having DS2 and DS3 for two days a week unless anything untoward happens to them. My dad has only just retired but my mum has been having DS1 and then DS2 as well two days a week for 4.5 years and absolutely loves it. DS3 will start at the nursery at the school in 2 years time but would continue with my parents until he starts school in 4 years time.

In terms of costings, we have lined up a childminder for DS3 which is v close to our house (instead of adding extra time to my working day in dropping off/collecting at DS1 and 2's old nursery). The old nursery cost £61 per day and they were there 8.45 ish til 5.30ish. Childminder is £5/hr and DS3 would be there from 8.15 pre-school run to about 5.15 post after-school club pick up (if we go down that route). Childminder plus afterschool club x 2 works out at £58.50 per day term-time. If we got a mother's help/housekeeper/additional cleaner to come for 2 hours x2 per week to help with housekeeping that would be around £10/hr so looking at total term-time spend of £78.50 per day. Obv more in school hols when 2 days of holiday club would need to be paid for.

If we had a nanny, DS3 would be at home with the nanny all day from 8.15 when I leave to take the bigger two to school/nursery/my parents until about 5pm as I will probably work 9.30 - 4.30. The nanny would need to collect DS1 and DS2 from school/nursery and probably give them a snack or maybe tea. They used to eat at 6pm when we got home from nursery before DS1 started school so a nanny may not need to do tea (although I fear they are now used to tea at 4.30 at after school club)Would a nanny do light cleaning/laundry/putting away of clean laundry/tidying/dishwasher loading & unloading etc? Can these things be fitted around looking after a child of 8m upwards as well as taking them to groups/out to the park etc?

Yikes, it's a minefield isn't it?!

Gosh I think school, nursery, childminder, grandparents, home, nanny, after school club and holiday club are far to many childcare settings for such small children.

A nanny full time would be best.

Would your existing clearer(s) do other tasks? Putting on a wash load, then doing the cleaning, then hanging the washing to dry perhaps?

Would a nanny do light cleaning/laundry/putting away of clean laundry/tidying/dishwasher loading & unloading etc?

Yes, well I do. However a nanny could cost you £100+ per day based on 8am-6pm, possibly less in some areas, more in cities.

I think your current plan is very good and it has some backup in it, such as your parents being able to help out (say a child is unwell enough not to go to school/minder but not so unwell you feel you need to stay with them). Childminder may (if space and commitments permits) be able to care for your other children.

So at this stage I would look at finding a cleaner who will do some of the other tasks as well as cleaning. See if that's an option that could work.
The washing mountain with 3 children is the big task (I nanny for 3 children) so any dent a cleaner can make in that the better, though you and DH will need to help with that as well. Does your DH help out with that sort of thing?

A 2 day a week nanny is an option, it will cost you more than your current figures. Employers NI on a nanny working 20 hours a week won't be a lot, possibly around £10 a week. Mileage, activities, that sort of thing can add up to quite a bit depending what is done. Though I would say if you budgeted for say £250 a week total cost, that should cover it. Where as your current projected cost is under £160 a week, so even adding a couple of hours more to your cleaner would not get you that near the nanny cost.

Think I'm getting confused with all the days thing. Are you after 2 days childcare, or 4? A nanny being paid £400 gross per week, would mean Employers NI of around £35 per week. So about £23,000 a year total cost before adding on activities/mileage/food/heating etc.

Where as your parents don't charge. So with them helping out, the costs are lower. Though it does mean the children go from one thing to another more.

I need 2 days cover as my parents will still do their usual 2 and I will only work 4 days. DH used to make a lot of headway with The Laundry Mountain as he often worked at home 2-3 days a week. But new job means he's out most of the week, often away 2-3 nights hence the change in circumstances. All the baby does is add to the laundry (esp as he's a puker).

Both DS1 and 2 love after school club and show no signs at all of being tired but I guess things might get harder for DS1 next year in Y1 hence why I wondered whether it would be better to give him a break from after school club (on the two days when his brother is at the school nursery) by having them picked up at the end of the standard school day and brought home to chill out a bit. I agree that it's a lot of childcare settings but DS1 and 2 were v happy splitting their weeks between day nursery and my parents and I'm sure DS3 will be fine splitting his week between my parents and a childminder.

I might look into nanny costs round here. Are agencies the best way forward?

It sounds like you are looking for someone to come in from 2-5.30 two days a week and do the school/childminder run and some housework before the school/childminder run and while your children are at home.

Is that correct?

Breathe: that is one option. The other option is someone who does all you say but also looks after the baby all day instead of him going to a childminder. I think the latter is definitely a nanny role based on what I've read on here and elsewhere.