Our nanny seems to have been using our tumble dryer...

[PacificDogwood]

She has been working for us for 2 years.
She's had some upset in her personal life in the last few months which she has kept close to her chest as is her right of course.

On 3 or 4 occasions now I have noticed that the tumble dryer is still warm when I come in, there had been none of our laundry to be done and the fluff filter was thickly coated in fluff including what I can only assume is dog hair (we have no pets, she has a dog and a cat). I empty the fluff filter after each use so have a fair idea what is usually in there.

Now, if she has a problem getting stuff done at home, I'd be happy for her to use our appliances (we are trying to reduce electricity bills and I only use the tumble dryer for a few minutes to fluff things up and then hang everything on our ceiling pulley thing, but hey ho, if she is stuck I'd be happy to help).

It's the fact she's not asked that does not sit right with me .
And I don't know how to approach this: "According to our fluff filter you have had unauthorised use of the dryer"??

Any words of advice?

I am now finding myself unable to even think the word 'fluff' without giggling

Yes, it is a new thing, in the last week or 2 and her H left probably about 6 months ago - or thereabouts. She only mentioned it a couple of months ago when I specifically asked how he was (small village, we had met, they live/d close by - just friendly chitchat).

Ah well, thanks for everybody's thoughts, I shall sleep on it.

I giggle at moist and my friend hates the word moist and I will use it at every chance to make her cringe mean friend

Moist fluff would send me over the edge !!!!

If last week or two maybe she's got wet on school run etc

I got soaked and jeans saturated and horrible so put in dryer and borrowed mb dressing gown (with her permission she was at home and told me to change into it)

Other times child been sick on me so wash clothes - usually have spare top in car

Maybe say to nanny regards dh - that if she wants to ever talk you are there - that's if you want to hear/get involved - some employers don't

Tbh I'm surprised she didn't mention dh leaving to you or even sending via a text to let you know - but didn't want to cry in front of you

Think I sent my mb an email explaining my situation - so she knew but so I didn't have to tell her and burst into tears iyswim

I would be upfront with her and simply ask her to not use the dryer. They use a lot of electricity.

If you are nervous of being too direct you could say something about being worried about the electricity bill.

You can tell her that you don't mind if she does it she is stuck but that you would prefer her not to do it routinely.

Don't be a wuss OP otherwise it will bug you.

As an ex employer of nannies over several year, and with varied success, I would just ask. Honesty and straightforwardness are the best policy.

You can have a look HERE to see how much it costs to run. If it's an A rated dryer it doesn't look like it costs that much?

It's very petty imo to bring up cost of running a tumble dryer - if op can afford to employ a nanny im assuming she's not living hand to mouth??

Parents underestimate the amount of time and work that goes into a childcarers day and i do free bregrudging someone who had cared for your most treasured possession daily for 2 years a bit mean tbh especially when you know she is having a rough time.
You say she is mature and staying with het mother a lot - perhaps she is drying her mothers clothes?

If it really bothers you i would (as someone else said) remove the fuse or pretend it's out of order - that way she will probably take the hint without you having to make yourself look mean!

Honesty and straightforwardness are the best policy.

I agree with this and will speak to her when I next see her. I will ask her to clear the filter if and when she uses the dryer and ask her whether she is struggling with anything in particular.

Reet, no, we do not live hand to mouth and we are in a position to justify the expense of a nanny. It's the underhandedness of not having been asked that bugs me, not simply the expense.

I have no idea what energy rating our dryer has - it is not exactly new

Reet - it doesn't seem quite the case for PD but some people have to cut back on some expenses to be able to afford a nanny. Cutting back on the power bill might just be enough to make the difference in some families. Just because people use a nanny, it doesn't mean they're rolling in money.

PD

FLUFF BALLS<

Maybe you can use the lint to knit a rug??

I could! Easily.
It'd be itchy due to the dog hair

Why don't I know what a fluff filter is?

I have never changed ours ( don't know where it is) and we have had the same machine for 11 years!

Arctic - really??
Your machine will not be running v efficiently then.

Ours is in the door, I pull it out from the top of the inside of the door.
Taking the fluff out is one of the free pleasures in my life

The filter at my mum's machine is at the bottom rim of the opening of the machine, also gets pulled up.

A friend of ours has just said to present our nanny with 1st written warning - seem vair harsh to me ! DH is in favour, I am not. Informal verbal chat telling her I'd rather be asked, written warning if ongoing seems less disproportionate to me

Artic - it's a wonder it hasn't blown up!!

It can be at the front on the inside of the door (dinner plate size) usually held in place with a spring type clip, it can be down the bottom near the 'seal' usually a plastic bit that slides up.

What make & model is it?

PD >itch< >itch<

It's a washer/dryer, not sure what make/model.

I'll ask dh perhaps he is the fluff fairy.

Don't listen to that pair of idiots! You cannot give her a written warning for possibly/maybe using a tumble dryer for possibly/maybe her own things - maybe.

Yes - somewhat more appropriate to ask her if she has been using it and not to without asking in the future!

Hmm - I'd be concerned if my DH was a secret fluff fairy

That's definitely harsh Pacific.

I would just mention to the Nanny that you have noticed she is using it and you would prefer her not to because you are mindful of bills etc. No need for talk of disciplinary warnings at this stage.

OH MY GOD I thought this thread was going to be going down the road of 'Our nanny seems to have been using our tumble-dryer... to get herself off.'

Phew.

Arctic - really??
Your machine will not be running v efficiently then.

Ours is in the door, I pull it out from the top of the inside of the door.
Taking the fluff out is one of the free pleasures in my life

The filter at my mum's machine is at the bottom rim of the opening of the machine, also gets pulled up.

A friend of ours has just said to present our nanny with 1st written warning - seem vair harsh to me ! DH is in favour, I am not. Informal verbal chat telling her I'd rather be asked, written warning if ongoing seems less disproportionate to me

No idea why that posted twice. With a gap.

Don't be stupid tracey

Everyone knows that washing machines are far superior for that!!

Not, not even the most tenuous trace of evidence to suggest any kind of 'getting off'

Oh, yes, I will ignore the overreacting harsh menz

When people used to talk about getting turned on by washing machines I thought they meant that they had sex in the washing machine .

I never even considered how difficult it would be to get in a position where that was possible.

Chipping