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Mindee taking toys home? Do you allow?

27 replies

jellyjelly · 14/06/2006 21:59

Feel like i have got myself into a losing battle with this one.

Mindee gets displined at our house but doesnt so much if any at home as they have told me so until she cant talk and understand (she is almost 2). She gets in a strop if she doesnt get her own way and wont often strop with me but will if her mum is coming to collect.

Her mum always says 'give him a toy to take to stop him having a strop otherwise my evening is awful as she sulks all night', today she went for a really big toy which is much loved by my own and it causes problems as my child wants to play with his toys and not get them taken home by mindee.

I know it isnt fair on mine when this is done and i wouldnt like it but the mum thinks it is ok (taking our toys home, always come back in the morning). When she wouldnt leave because i wouldnt give her the toys she started to strop and mum said 'did you take the toy away' and had to say yes because it goes upstairs with mine for play. Mindee got another one and almost went happily.

Advice please, think i want to stop the toys going but will feel belittled about it as it doesnt sound a big deal.

OP posts:
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handlemecarefully · 14/06/2006 22:02

I think if she wants to take a toy home with her and it doesn't bother your children then that's fine, but if your children are upset by her taking a particular toy then she must choose an alternative. They are your children's toys after all

Katymac · 14/06/2006 22:06

his has happened occasionally - I just say

"these are Katy's toys, they are here for you to play with, you can't take them home"

if I get a stroppy child I just pick them up and put them in their cars seat with a "now strap him in safely" and "see you tomorrow" then go in the house

But then I'm horrid Wink

HenniPenni · 14/06/2006 22:06

If it bothers you and your children (it certainly would mine),I think I would suggest to mum that she buys a few little toys that can be kept at yours for her to take home in the evening.

Katymac · 14/06/2006 22:09

Hennipenni's idea is much better than mineGrin

jellyjelly · 14/06/2006 22:10

They walk, i know they want a quiet time becuase i get mum saying 'child go get a toy to take home'

Advice on that.

OP posts:
Katymac · 14/06/2006 22:13

erm....a quiet word suggesting that your toys should be left for your children?

or "no - don't, leave my toys here"...wellmaybe not

HenniPenni · 14/06/2006 22:13

Thanks KatyGrin

jellyjelly, why don't you charge? Think that would put them off!!
I sound a hard hearted cow don't I, I'm a right softy really.

jellyjelly · 14/06/2006 22:16

charge for taking the toys home? or should that have been on another thread?

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jellyjelly · 14/06/2006 22:17

I am a softy especially when people are veryassertive as i can be but try to please hence getting into these problems.

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HenniPenni · 14/06/2006 22:20

I'm afraid I'm the least assertive person around, "Of course Johny can take a toy home" but at the same time I'd be thinking GRRRR did I really say that!

Katymac · 14/06/2006 22:20

I agree charge them a hiring fee, deposit and insurance

It'll soon stopGrin

We are being mean to you tonite...I just feel contraversal

cat64 · 14/06/2006 22:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

jellyjelly · 14/06/2006 22:24

I know that bounderies are great and child doesnt normally act up unless it is hometime because said child get own way so does it. Child is not told off at home for anything and they give in for an easy life have tried to explain that it woldnt take long to make child relise that stropping doesnt get anywhere.

OP posts:
handlemecarefully · 14/06/2006 22:25

I think a suggestion of charging for taking a toy home is hideous. Actually far better to say just 'sorry, no'

HenniPenni · 14/06/2006 22:26

IT WAS A JOKE!!

handlemecarefully · 14/06/2006 22:27

That's okay then, I was getting all indignant there for a second. Your delivery is very dry Grin

jellyjelly · 14/06/2006 22:27

ok tips for dealing with it tomorrow when mindee goes to pick a toy when mums comes.

'Sorry my son gets very upset with his toys going walkabout? So the toys will have to stay here if your child wants to bring one thats fine btu cant take mine home.' How does that sound?

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Katymac · 14/06/2006 22:28

hmc - it really wasn't serious...it's just "my house.....my rules" seems to get forgotten by parents at going home time

Jelly doesn't like something that started innocently - prob as a once off - which is now every day

HP & I were messin' jelly round (cos we're mean)

handlemecarefully · 14/06/2006 22:28

Yep that's sounds fine jellyjelly

HenniPenni · 14/06/2006 22:29

I do have a very dry sence of humourSmile and an inability to spell correctly!

Katymac · 14/06/2006 22:30

Just say - like cat says "it's not a good idea for him to think he can take other people things.....so it's better to set a precedent and not take things from here"

or even that old chestnut

"my insurance doesn't cover it" (os that was ajoke tooWink)

HenniPenni · 14/06/2006 22:33

Katy Stop it! Grinthis thread has cheered me up after the trials I'm having with eldest DD.

Jelly, I think that is the right thing to say

Katymac · 14/06/2006 22:40

Sorry I am being nortie tonite

jellyjelly · 14/06/2006 22:46

Yes you are, go and sit in time out.

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Katymac · 14/06/2006 22:51

That'll be 38 minutes....I think I'll go to bed, can I have my time out in my bedroom with the door closed?

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